Ten month old cot dodger and general non sleeper.

[TheHubblesWindscreenWipers]

My ten month old son is a bit of a nightmare, sleep wise. He fights sleep every time, tries to stay awake as long as he can, screams blue murder if he's taken for a nap etc. He's also very alert. Last night we'd allllmost got him back down at one am and dh put the monitor gently down. It made the tiniest, softest click and ping! Eyes open, back to square one.

Any ideas why he might hate sleep so much? any tips on making him more relaxed and less vigilant? We do a routine of bath, milk, pjs, walk round and say night night to various inanimate objects then cuddles in a darkened room. We've tried white noise. He doesn't have a comfort you, despite great efforts to introduce one.

He's a dreadful sleeper and we've kind of resigned ourselves to that. But I hate the idea that he's afraid of sleep. He often wakes screaming both truly awake and not really awake - can they get night terrors?

Any ideas?

We've tried cc ( don't flame me we were desparate and our baby clinic doc suggested it.) it didn't work, we tried it for five nights but we just couldn't bear to do it any more.

He just never calmed down between 'checks' - he cried ( well, screamed, scratched himself until he bled etc) all night. Then was up by five and ready for the day. It was utter hell. In the end we had to stop because we were both so tired and Ds was getting afraid of even going near the bedroom.

It took us three weeks to even be able to put him in the cot without him freaking out after that :(

I feel like I'm failing him

No flaming here it's a valid method when you have tried other things and usually works
Very quickly leading to much less crying overall. I am so sorry it did not work for you And that sounds like a really distressing experience. Have you tried Andrea grace? She has had success with some sleep refusing babies that have not responded to cc

Although it sounds very extreme and I do hope the specialist can get to the bottom of it. Assume you have ruled out allergies, ear infections? Etc?

One last suggestion, I know you said he was a dummy refuser so was my ds until 7 months when I successfully got him to take one attached to a soft toy bunny thing. I had given up on it but he took it having always refused. May have been as it was the same time we moved from breast to bottle.

I'll wait and see what the consultant has to say tomorrow... Then I'll maybe contact her :/

He's had his ears checked and I did give up dairy and soy for six weeks to see if it was that. It wasn't (thankfully... Gallons of decaf tea is about my only vice right now...)

I will also try the dummy again. Can't hurt! I keep trying to give him a comforter too but he's not bothered at all. Contrary little monkey.

Good luck, sleep deprivation is awful and colours everything.

Thank you. It does indeed. Everything looks worse on no sleep.

Oh we do.... We cuddle up and feed lying down. He won't stay latched if he's upright or in my arms

So you feed lying down, presumably on your bed? Could you just leave him there, nipple in mouth? What's your rationale for transferring to cot ?

Well he goes to bed at 7 and I need an hour or two of alone time before I go to bed or I'll go nuts :)

I can't leave him there because as soon as he wakes he's up and climbing and could fall (high bed, hard floors.) we used to build a wall of cushions round him but he can be over them now in seconds (even in a sleeping bag, child is seriously agile!) he's got to go in the cot. I don't have space to put a mattress on the floor which was our other idea.

Also the little angel bites in his sleep

How knackered are you? Would it do you any harm to go to bed at 7pm just for the short term to get him sleeping? He wakes every 10-60 minutes and takes ages to settle, you must be in and out the room anyway.

If the transferring is the problem, I wouldn't transfer.

If feeding to sleep is the only possible thing that will ever work, I'd feed to sleep.

If feeding lying down works, leave him there.

An option would be to put your mattress on the floor.

I can certainly give it a try - just get him to sleep any way I can?

Yes. That's absolutely the point.

Any sleep. Anywhere. Any way.

Well, just got back from the consultant. She thinks it's a physical issue. Possibly gastrointestinal, possibly neurological.
We have had a bunch of tests sent off, some reflux medication, a referral to gastro and a referral to the neurological chap.
I feel vindicated in a way that there is an issue, but pretty upset. Poor little guy :(

Wow only just reading this but it has made me feel lucky to only be up every 1-2 hrs! Glad the specialist took it seriously.

I've never had it and don't know of any evidence to support it but I assume you are desperate to try anything and I notice no one has mentioned trying cranial osteopathy? In all honesty I'm a bit sceptical about it, but, if I was in your position, I'd probably be willing to try anything. When I was struggling with infertility, I tried reflexology, acupuncture, eating Brazil nuts and kiwi fruits etc etc...none worked (ivf did!) but it made me feel like I was doing something. Plus osteopathy helped me massively with some neck injuries so I feel like it would be something I'd be comfortable trying.

Might be worth looking in to?

I really hope you.get some sleep soon, you have my complete sympathies. I'm struggling on 1-2 hourly wake ups...

I go to bed really early to try to help combat the sleep deprivation. In fact, off to bed now! X

Ah your poor little man. Hope the reflux medication makes a difference and you get seen by the specialists soon, do keep us posted how he is. My son is under neuro and on a medication that seems to make him hyperactive so there are defo additional factors to contend with than just being a baby trying to learn to sleep sometimes I think.
Absolutely feed to sleep do what you need to do to both get some sleep.
Re dummies I've just remembered my health visitor told me about Dutch dummies- it was the one dummy my son would have albeit not for long, I could only find it in a local independent health shop (they aren't easy to find) but might be worth a try
Thanks for sharing how you did things fatedestiny it made me really try harder to think of how my son is feeling not me easy to forget when stressed! last 2 nights my ds not easy to settle but it put me in a good mindset to cope with it better and felt much better all round, he loves having his hand stroked to sleep haha