Help! Not sure how to deal with 16 month old waking

[Ilovecrumpets]

Hello everyone. Was just wondering if anyone could give me some advice on how to approach my DS2s crap sleep.

He is 16 months and has never been a good sleeper. He had for a couple of months though been waking only a couple of times a night and could be settled very quickly. This however has now changed to multiple times most nights - so I am often up for up to 4 hours. I am on my own most of the time and just really need a plan tomatoey this as am feeling quite desperate.

Basically what happens is he wakes up crying. I go in and he is standing in his cot. I lie him down, pat his bottom and say 'sleepy time' and he settles most times straight away. As i said this used to work fine. Now however 10 minutes later he is up crying again. If I go in do the lie him down and pat he will resettle again straight away. However 10 minutes later the same thing will happen. This can then go on for hours. It is also starting to happen once after he has been put down to bed for the evening.

I can see the lying him down and quick pat has now become his sleep crutch ( I guess no different from having to put a dummy back in!). I'm just a bit unsure about how to deal with it though. Should I not lie him down and pat at all? Should I do it the first time but then the next time not? I'm also a bit unsure what I should do instead - I was wondering if I should maybe just talk to him - I know that without the lie and pat he will become very upset and I don't want to just completely leave him.

Anyway if anyone has any ideas what approach to take id be really grateful!

Do you think he could be hungry/thirsty?

My 16 month old still feeds two/three times in the night. It is probably partly for hunger and partly for comfort, but is settles him back to sleep :)

Thanks for replying Happy. Am pretty sure he isn't hungry as he doesn't really want to have any milk when he gets up in the morning. I did try feeding him one night, he drank the bottle but still didn't go to sleep!

A 16 month old shouldn't need any night feedings.

My dd is like this lately she is 15 mo..and it is really draining.
She will wake up I give her the dummy she goes quiet then 5 mind later she is up again and will only go quiet if I stamd next to her and she can see me so you'd not the only one

Thanks cherry - it may indeed be another phase. Let's hope it passes quickly for both of us

Could it be teeth? Dd2 is 17 months and since 6 months has been a rubbish sleeper but sometimes goes bedtime to 23:30 without waking & other nights is awake 4-5 times in that period. I do the sleepy time & lie her down with similar mixed results as you.
She's got 3 teeth all coming through at the moment which I'm hoping is the cause.
It seems endless but they get there. DD1 took til just around 3 so comparatively Dd2 is a breeze (and I just shove Dd2 in bed with me if the waking gets too annoying!)

Twisted I wondered teeth as he unbelievably only has 4! Calpol didn't help but then it doesn't always I guess. I may try nurofen this evening instead.

It does seem never ending - my DS1 used to wake at 4.45 until he was nearly 3 but is a fab sleeper now so I do have ( some) hope!

Hi I was going to suggest teeth too. Especially if he only has four, there may be a number of them grumbling away just under the surface. Dc3 is 17mo and has about 11 cut through I think, including the molars, which can be really painful if they're on the way. DS also has angry red bumps which show the eye teeth are on their way, which my mum always said were the worst. Possibly got a lot of pain in one go?

If you see the gums are red, you could possibly try calpol if he seems in pain and see if it helps? Obviously I'm not suggesting you give it every night, but it might ease the pain enough to help resettle and break the cycle?

(Disclaimer: dc3 still wakes often and co-sleeps, so I feel your pain re lack of sleep, am trying to sort it myself, but not sure where to start!)

Sorry noticed you said calpol doesn't help

Thanks daisy - it may very well be teeth moving that aren't showing as yet.

Sadly he won't co sleep anymore otherwise I'd do that - although then I'd eventually be looking to sort that too, so maybe it is a blessing in disguise!

I do find calprofen aids sleep much more than calpol but I'm still not 100% madam's digestion isn't an issue so try not to give it too much.
Is 4 teeth not "normal"? Dd2 only had 4 til about 6 weeks ago & now has 5 and 3 more part through & DD1 was nearly a year before she had any.

Iguess - how is it inconceivable that a 16month old child may be thirsty during next the night? The majority of adults unknown take a glass of water with them to bed and take a sip or two during the night.

OP I agree with others it could maybe be teething? DD is nearly 18months and her sleep got worse a couple months ago when her canines came through, she's settled back now and although she still wakes more often than not sometimes she's much more easily settled.