Hi
I never intended to properly co sleep (we did have the arms reach co sleeping original cot attached to my side of the bed) but did on a part time basis from when LO was 3mo until 12mo. Was fantastic. DH swears we got more sleep than our non co sleeping parent friends. I think he is right.
UNICEF and la Leche league both produce guides on safe co sleeping. The NHS used to give them to new parents via your HV.
LO would start the night in the co sleeper cot and come in with us when he woke or needed a feed (could be as early as 8pm! Or as late as 1am)
As a result of my research LO slept between me and the co sleeper cot, with a towel stuffed down the gap so he wouldn't slip down. This also meant daddy could not roll onto him.
LO slept with his nose at about boob height, so well away from the pillow.
LO wore his usual nappy, vest and PJs but no sleeping bag.
I slept with a thin cardi on over my vest top
I got rid of the duvet until LO was about 9mo (when he could crawl and stand, as well as sit up unaided). Instead We used a super king sheet and super king blanket(s) on our king size bed. Was toasty warm but safer than a duvet.
I didn't drink more than a glass of something in the evenings, didn't smoke, was overweight but not grossly obese and generally we followed the unicef guidelines. LO was bf on demand way past 6mo.
I did everything to make it safe. I also read the james McKenna articles. Basically co sleeping safely is safe. Many of the stats people try to scare you with don't take into account that deaths caused by parent and baby sharing a sleep surface do not record whether that was a safe sleep surface or a sofa or with a drunk parent.
Follow your instincts and enjoy!!
We loved co sleeping. There is also evidence that sleeping in close proximity with dad really aids their bonding and I would say my 2 are closer than any other dad / child we know. LO is now nearly 4!!!