Baby wants to latch on all night - how to break this habit

[Sparrowlegs248]

Anothe night of constantly disturbed sleep. Ds feeds to sleep around 7. Wakes 9.30-10, feeds, back in cot. Was sleepung til around 1 then feeding and co sleeping. Currently lucky if he goes another hour in his cot after hus 9.30/10 feed.

Co sleeping - stirs at least every 45 minutes rooting and pulling at my nightie. Latches on, back to sleep.

Will NOT take a dummy. Oh how i have tried. I do have a husband. He gets up at 4am 7 days a week and works two jobs. No days off. So trying to keep things quiet overnight.

Any suggestions re the boob addiction? I feel i need to try to settle him without latching on. Obviously i am happy to feed him.overnight but he isnt really feeding until around 3am.

Hes 6mo. Help. I'm knackered and back to work in april.

P.s. Wont take a bottle either but is starting to drink feom a sippee cup.

If he's waking that often even with cosleeping it may be wind/gas and he's uncomfortable. When you feed make sure it's not just his head that's turned towards you and you're lining his head, shoulder and hip, i.e you're belly to belly if you see what I mean. He could be swallowing air. If you're happy to feed overnight can you get into a comfy position and fall asleep while he's suckling? I end up falling asleep while dd is latched on.

A few thoughts:

Is he used to falling asleep whilst feeding? Could you break the link by putting him down at 7pm and not feeding then? Or giving him milk in a cup?

Shh/ pat method works during the night.

Could you gradually cut out the 9.30 feed? The way to do this is time it and reduce it by 2 mins each night. When you want to stop the baby from feeding, pop your little finger in its mouth. Give it a few seconds to see if he goes to sleep.

Once that feed is gone you can cut out the next one.

I found a book called the no cry sleep solution was good on reducing breastfeeding at night.

Thanks for your replies. He is used to feeding to sleep, he doesn't self settle as a rule. Only very very occasionally. Its not wind. He just searches for the nipple every time he stirs. Its not so much the actual feeds that are a problem but stirring and wanting to latch on so often. Sometimes he literally latches on, two sucks and sleeps again. But if i dont let him he wakes noisily. I feel like i have to try to quieten him due to the husband getting up so early but its not helping.

I don't know whether to persist with the cot all night, if a bit of distance between us would help. I am not sure it would though as when he is in his cot he wakes/stirs and rolls over to where he expects me to be, with his mouth wide open!

I'm stuck with this but with a ten month old!

Oh o fond !! I am back to work when he is 9months!!

Does your dc just latch on or is it actual feeding? I am sure he could feed at 10, 1, 5 or less than that even. But how!? And some babies sleep through much younger than this.

I have got the no cry book, just not read it yet......

We do feed face to face too, and again, i am happy for him to feed a couple of times in the night but am currently not getting more than 45 minutes sleep at a time.

Six months was the age I gave up breastfeeding and dd went into her own room. I couldnt take any more latching and the lack of sleep. It made such a difference for us both. She started to learn to sleep independently and by age one she slept through the night. What a relief!

Did you switch to formula then? Did it make a difference quite quickly? I am considering formula in a sippee cup at night, as he won't take a bottle.

The cot is in my room. The room is pretty big, my redhead against one wall, his cot is along the opposite wall, there's a space of about 5feet between the foot of my bed and the side of his cot.

I'd switch to bottles completely - by expressing or formula. Start now before work starts so he's fully converted before as it could take a while for him to accept bottles

He won't take a bottle fug I have tried with ebm for ages but have given up now as he was getting so distressed about it. He's normally a very content baby but really got very upset about the bottle. He's starting to drink water from a cup though so going to try milk in it next (sippee cup)

Try the book 'teach yourself: baby sleep' and follow it. If you do exactly what they suggest: it'll work! No need to stop bf unless you want to :)

Dd wouldn't take the bottle until I gave up b feeding but then she took it fine. Be sure to get a faster flowing teat. Your child is no longer a new born so will want to feed faster probably. Formula was fine. Do what works for you.

Read no cry sleep solution.
It's not as bad as when she was 6 months I think 6 months they are feeding almost like newborns ready to sit up and change alot.
I'm going to follow no cry book soon and put her in own room and be strict about co sleeping.

Also don't tighten the bottle too tight. You need to hear some bubbling when baby is drinking otherwise it makes bottle feeding frustrating for the baby. Ie air needs to get into the bottle to replace the milk being drunk. I didn't know this until I was told and it really helped. Hope I'm making sense.

Thanks, i will try both the book and a faster that though if he will drink it from a cup i will be happy.

Last night he woke within a couple of minutes of putting him back in his cot at 10ish. Picked him up for a bit and he fell asleep on my shoulder. Put down, woke. Picked up, asleep immediately.

Put in bed with me, fed (only fed 20minutes before and i did try to keep him awake feeding) and has indeed been attached much of the night. Wide awake at 3.50. Just feeding now almost asleep but the usual problem at this time of day is i think there is no milk.

This is totally normal.

My DS fed through the night until 2.8. I eventually night weaned him using the Dr Jay Gordon method (Google it!) - it's very gentle and involves a bit of protest from the baby but works over the course of a couple of weeks.

I will look into that too, thank you. Everyone i speak to considers it highly abnormal. How on earth did you cope for that long?

Is it possible to still do a night feed or two without this constant latching on?

His daytime nap are cap too so i don't get the chance to nap with him.

My DSis had exactly this. It's pretty common I think. She used No Cry Sleep Solutions to night wean/stop feeding to sleep at about 6 months (kept a dream feed for a while) and it worked well. Was really tough for about a week but helped baby to learn to comfort with fingers/a knotted muslin and reliably sleep through in his own cot. No need to stop breastfeeding if you don't want to. I hear good things about The Gentle Sleep Book too.

Have looked Dr Jay Gordon up - he says not to start til at least 12 months. Thinking maybe i could do it for less time - he suggests 7 hrs. I'd be happy with 4!

Hey @nottalotta are you still there by any chance?! Currently going through what you were going through... baby is also 6 months! Did anything help you? What did you end up doing? Thank youuuu xx

Hello, I am still here! That baby is 4.5 now and has a 3 yr old sibling! I really can't remember much between 6 and 12 months tbh, except I went back to work at 9 months.

I do know at 12 months I started offering cows milk at bedtime, and he soon chose that over a bf, by 13 months I started gradual withdrawal which worked brilliantly, I did it very very gradually though. By 15 months he was going into his cot awake, falling asleep with me sitting outside the door (10/20 minutes) and sleeping til 4.30/5am. It must seem a lifetime away to you now though.

Wow! Congratulations on the arrival of number 2! We’ve started weaning so I’m hoping that when she’s having 3 meals a day she’ll need less through the night? This breastfeeding business is hard! Did you breastfeed number 2 as well? Haha 15 months does seem like a little way away 😂

Haha thank you, number 2 was so e what accidental, it really does only take once

I went back to work at 9 months, and ds1 dropped day time feeds quite quickly after that, as I work 3 full days in a row. He still fed at night though. I started the gradual retreat because I was pregnant and needed to do something! It was really good though, very laid back, no crying. Took it really slowly ds1 dropped his last early morning feed 6 days before dc2 was born. Dc2 stopped his night feeds in October, so about 2 yrs 8 months. But he sleeps very well and just had a couple of small feeds overnight , as we co slept.

It will pass, it seems like another life to me now!

Hi I am having the same issue with my 8 month old and I neither know what to do. I’ve been told by the breastfeeding helpline that it’s the baby whose a mammals natural instinct to stay latched. As in the animal kingdom mothers don’t put their young down until they’re 2 in fear of a lion eating them. So it’s the baby’s instinct to stay latched. They said they tend to self soothe between 12-18 months. My worry was if I didn’t stop am I creating a bigger problem. It’s a tricky one.Shes same won’t take a dummy/ bottle, feeds to sleep. Can be rocked to sleep but then wants boob when put down.