Anyone Help??? Im being silly I think.....

[JARMgotstuckupthechimney]

As most of you know, I knew the 3rd murdered girl in Ipswich, Anneli Alderton.

We went to school together, but lost contact at 16.

The news has shaken me anyway, being a local, but Im finding it really hard to sleep.

I have started having flashbacks every time I close my eyes, of Annie as I knew her at school.

I dont know if Im being silly, and to just put it out of my mind, but after only 9 hours sleep in 3 nights, its annoying me slightly.

Any advice? sleeping tablets? counselling (surely not?)

Please?

Anyone?

Sorry to hear this. Maybe you should seek some kind of counselling or perhaps there is a support number for friends and relatives to call. The fact that you knew her years ago doesn't matter you probably need to share your memories with someone who knew her too.

I dont know of a phone number.

Its all really strange, I just dont get it.

All I want to do is sleep and not have images flashing infront of my eyes.

you're not being silly. i would think it is something that will pass. about 6 months ago a girl i was friends with at school was murdered in her home which is also fairly close to where i live and it really shook me up.
what a horrid world

I remember being particularily disturbed (mind you, who wasn't) by the Jamie Bulger murder as my nephew was the same age at the time and looked like Jamie Bulger. Not got much advice, sorry, except to say just to talk to people about it. Are you still in touch with other people from school who also knew her? Obviously this case is getting a lot of coverage because of the probable serial killer angle so it's going to be in the news a lot. It may be hard but try not to read every little detail about it.

JARM, you're not being silly - it's a really awful thing to happen to anyone, but the fact you knew her must really bring it home. Apart from talking to someone close to you about how you feel and warm drinks before bed I don't have any suggestions for now you've had some mental 'trauma' and it'll probably improve with time.

I've used muscular relaxation with patients I've had that struggle to sleep because of pain - maybe it might help, give your mind something else to concentrate on while your going to sleep? If you're still struggling in a few nights you could give it a go - link here

Apart from that there's a few herbal remedies around - try your local health food shop or holland and barrett - places like that.

Hope you get some sleep soon. x.

Jarm, when I was pregnant with DS I went on friends reunited and got reacqainted with my first 'school' boyfriend. We exchanged a couple of emails, filling in the gaps etc. He was going through a break up at the time, 2 little girls etc.

Then about 2 months later a friend rang me to say that he had been murdered by his wifes new boyfriend..........

I was horrified and I couldnt stop thinking about it, hadn't seen him in 20 something years, but it haunted me for ages, I too kept having flashbacks of his face etc...

It's strange isn't it. I never went to the funeral but I sent some flowers. I still think about it 3 years later. It does fade with time honest.

Thanks guys

Have been to sleep but awake again

Am going back to bed again in a minute. Lets hope as you all say, time will make it easier.

Guess Im finding it hard tonight as I am actually in Ipswich now til Monday and it all feels a little eeerie.

Fingers crossed for at least a little more sleep.

Hello JARM, sweetheart - I'm sorry you're having trouble sleeping

I would suggest going to the doc if you keep on having flashbacks - or perhaps trying Nytol or something similar - might help break the cycle?

Can you send a condolence card? Might help you to channel your energy into making one?

Thanks all of you.

Sleep has got better, still feel very shaken, especially as bloomin reporters seem hell bent on getting something from me - they can all sod off. One of them has even emailed me via Friends Reunited so a huge THANK YOU to COD for telling me to delete my profile on there as it gave away too much info really.

Devastated that she was pregnant at the time, and am harrowed by the latest CCTV footage of her.

Im sure my flashbacks will pass, they are less frequent, so thats a bonus.

I am now the proud owner of a rape alarm and the leaflets the Suffolk Police are handing out in town.

I am maybe niaeve (sp?) for thinking he has stopped for now, but who knows.