fed up with hourly wakings and not settling- help

[kbaby]

Can someone help?
DS is 19 weeks old and up until 3 weeks ago was sleeping from 8pm to 2am and then to 5am, however he is now waking almost hrly and in between that its getting really difficult to settle him in his cot.
Last night he went to bed at 8pm, woke at 9 I fed him at 10 and he wouldn?t settle in his cot until 11pm, then he woke at 1am where I fed him but again he didn?t settle until 2.30am then woke again at 3.20am until 4.05. Its taking us a number of attempts at getting him to stay asleep in his cot. As soon as you pick him up he falls asleep in your arms but he just wont seem to accept being put down. Im feeling really disheartened with it all as were all so tired and I cant seem to find a way to get him to sleep for longer stretches or at least go down in his cot so we get some sleep between feeds.

He is bf and currently is held until he is asleep and then put down.
Does anyone know of any way I can encourage him to go to sleep on his own? Hes too young for cc and co sleeping isn?t for me.

I completley empathise - my DS is 15 weeks old and has just started doing exactly the same - also breast fed and falls asleep while I am feeding so I put him down when he is asleep already. He had been sleeping from 7.30pm til 3am and then again until 6-7am but the last week he has started 'whingeing' soon after being put down and won't stop unless I am in the room. May sound harsh but last nightI knew he wasnn't hungry and I had just changed his nappy so I braced myself and ignored him. He stopped after 7 minutes, started again 10 minuts later but then stopped and went to sleep after another 5 minutes. Part of me thinks he is just trying out a new 'noise' to see what response it gets him but at the back of my mind I do still worry that he is genuinely upset about something...
Would love to know if anyone else has had the same....

Exactly the same thing happened to me - right down to the times and everything. I felt neither of us were ready for CC but it did get better naturally, particularly after I changed the structure of DS's daytime naps. Apparently at 4 months their sleeping patterns change and become more adult, and they can no longer survive on 30 minute catnaps in the push chair or car. They need fewer, longer naps of 45 minutes or more and at least one a day should be stationary sleep. I had got so used to having a portable little baby I was letting DS nap anywhere and everywhere without realising that he wasn't getting the sleep he needed. Paradoxically bad daytime sleep makes for worse nighttime sleep as they get overtired.

I instituted a very rough routine of wake at 7am, nap either in the cot or in bouncy chair at 9am for about 45 minutes, nap in the cot at 1pm for about an hour and a half (DS usually requires resettling halfway through this) and finally a nap of about 30-45 minutes at 4pm in the buggy.

The two short naps are moveable and do take place in the buggy or car, but I try to keep the midday nap sacrosanct. It didn't cut DS's night waking but reduced it considerably, he is now back to once or twice a night, which is bearable.

HTH.

oh my god - I am experiencing exactly the same thing at exactly the same age kbaby. I thought it was due to lots of travelling but I now realise its a developmental thing at around 4 mths.

All I can do is sympathise - it's really tough but I can't offer any solutions.

We experimented with a later bedtime - that increased his daytime sleep but the night was the same. I'm loathed to do any crying stuff - now or later- he just gets hysterical.

I'm just gonna suck it and see for the time being and see what transpires.

have you heard of 'the no cry sleep solution' by elizabeth pantley?? fab book for those of us who don't want to go down the cc route. the author breastfed and co slept and still had babies that slept well. give it a go, worked wonders for us.

MistletoeGolightly- DS sleeps in his cot for his naps but wakes after 30 mins and no amount of resettling him makes him sleep longer.

Bizzy- I do have that book but didn?t find it offered anything to help. I don?t want to co sleep and the book suggested trying things and if they don?t work try again soon.

Tonight its taken me over 1 hr to get him to stay in his cot. Each time I lay him down his eyes sprung open and he started crying, then it took me 10 mins to calm him down again and another 20 mins to get him back to sleep.

Just wanted to say Kbaby, I have exactly the same problem with my 15 week old. I absolutely can't get her to resettle after a 30 minute nap during the day and her previously good night sleeping has gone absolutely haywire. I haven't got any suggestions for you just thought I'd let you know you're not alone.

I also didn't find anything in NCSS. I bought Baby Whisperer and tried for a week but still couldn't get her to settle. I won't do CC so I suppose I just have to stick it out.

Just been to the Doctors for Henry's injections and the nurse thinks his waking is due to teething... I hadn't thought of that but would make sense.

Ladies, I have the answer!
I have been through all of this, so much so after 4 weeks of hell, I turned to Millpond the sleep clinic as my health visitor was no help and I refused point blank to do cc or co-sleep ( I personally think that just starts another problem and having a 4 year old ds know how hard it is to break).
What you need to do is to teach them to settle by themselves. The wakings are nothing to do with hunger, teething, too hot, too cold etc. When you think about it, if they are being put in their cots deeply asleep after being rocked, fed etc, when they stir into light sleep they think "Help, come back and do that again!"
I was up three times a night for an hour and half each time - not anymore! Still up twice breastfeeding, but I fling him back in the cot awake after 15 mins and leave him to it and there are no tears! He is 16 weeks today and for the first time EVER, I put him in his cot awake and he quickly and easily fell asleep all by himself - so proud!
Get the Millpond book from their website or contact them about their Gradual Retreat programme - it works! Be warned - gets worse before it gets better, but I'm only on day 7 and already so much better.
Now going to work on gradually and gently stretching feeds at night to get him sleeping through.

hi Tidders

I would be interested to know how it works. I'm getting pretty run down as I'm back at work and not getting much more than a few hrs sleep a night.

I did think, however, teeth were an issue last night as he was moaning and seemed better after some calpol. However, I commit all the cardinal sleep sins of rocking him and feeding him to sleep and he never goes down awake ( apart from in the pram)

Would like to know more about your experiences.

thanks

tiddlers did you speak to a sleep advisor or just use the book.