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Original poster

HELP - Dummy keeps on falling out!

52 replies

meiko · 05/12/2006 20:55

I have 13 week old twins. One of them is totally dependant on his dummy. He goes to slepp at 8pm and falls asleep fine. If dummy falls out he keeps sleeping. He then wakes around 2.30am and for rest of night keeps dropping dummy out every 10 or 20 mins and crying. What should I do - think i am going to crack up!!

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vickersnoknickers · 14/01/2007 12:10

watching this thread with interest as trying to summon up the courage to get rid of dummy for DD (12wks). I've just put her down for lunchtime nap without dummy but spent 10 mins with my finger in her mouth which although not a dummy still means that she's not putting herself to sleep... and i can hear her waking up now probably wondering where her dummy is! She tries to put her thumb in her mouth but can't keep it there for very long. Also interested to hear how you managed Hanlou?

dcb · 15/01/2007 15:08

hanlou are you there???

becksmummy · 15/01/2007 18:01

is there anyone else out there who has weaned their dd or ds off a dummy when they were still a baby not a toddler?

Looks there are are a few of us who would like some advice on how to go about it!!

dcb · 15/01/2007 19:18

managed to get her to have 2 daytime naps without dummy today. she cried a lot this morning but went to sleep with me shushing her/rubbing tummy instead plus i gave her a muslin to suck. she went to sleep after about 20 mins of this. we were out at lunchtime though for dh's b'day so gave in to dummy v quickly! then teatime nap it only took 5 mins of the same - i was amazed. we've also not given her her dummy in between sleeps today if she was a bit grizzly - distracted her instead. it was easier today though as dh was off. don't know if i will manage in the middle of the night. i tried for a while last night at 3am after a feed and before i knew it it was 4am - then brought her into bed but was determined not to give her the dummy as well - that went on 'til 5am when i gave in. was pretty pissed off as kept thinking i could've had 2 more hrs sleep! dh back at work tomorrow so will prob go for the easy route. but maybe tackle the daytimes first and then go for it??? she seems to like sucking the muslin at least.

dejags · 15/01/2007 19:22

Hi all,

I should have mentioned (if I didn't) that I didn't try the muslin square until DSs had the coordination to put the dummy back in themselves circa 6 months +

Good luck

becksmummy · 15/01/2007 20:18

I have been using the muslin square idea and I think it has definately reduced the amount of times dd wakes for the dummy during the night but hasnt stopped them altogether,

Well done dcb for at least making a start, I would like to wean dd off her dummy but I think I am at a loss how to go about it and know there will probably be a lot of crying which puts me off trying!!

vickersnoknickers · 15/01/2007 20:56

Good to hear that you're having some success DCB! If it's any consolation I also gave in at 5am last night and gave my lo the dummy after her feed. How old is your DD? I'm trying to get mine to go to bed in the evening which she hasn't yet done so I think I'm trying too much at once. Anyway, perserverance is key... got to keep telling myself that!

dcb · 15/01/2007 21:23

VNK - dd is 6 months. am shattered so don't hold out much hope for tonight. i'm not expecting her to sleep through the night (although i think that's what everyone else expects at her age). wouldn't mind getting up once a night most of the time - it's not too much to ask is it/
????

san2 · 15/01/2007 21:34

Hi!
I have read your thread with interest I used a dummy for my DS (now 8 months) to get him back to sleep in middle of night and for naps. For some reason he would go to sleep fine at night. He started waking at night with tummy ache/wind at 8 weeks and then it became habit and I didn't want to do CC.
Anyway got really knackered from getting up so much and felt v low.
A friend was having similar issues and bought an amby baby hammock which helped her DS.
I got one at 5.5months and it really helped. Straight away he started waking far less i.e went form 4-5 wakings to only waking for 1 feed.
Now not feeding in night. We get some squawks but he has worked out how to bounce himself off again. Also he goes to sleep in day without dummy.
Anyway - thought this may be another option for you sleep deprived mums to try.
Only thing is I am now having to think about when he will go back into cot. I am still not into CC so may well be resorting back to dummy and hoping he can pick it up himself!!

dcb · 16/01/2007 09:15

well, managed without the dummy overnight , however she did come into bed with me ater feed at 3am as she was very alert and showed no signs of going to sleep. she "sings" to herself in her cot but if left alone this turns into crying. i know she's seeking attention and comfort and i know that i am rewarding her by getting into bed but i guess 1 thing at a time for now. she's also just gone down for morning nap without dummy - result! i think it's partly because we had some sort of pre-nap/bed routine already but mainly because she has a muslin to suck instead. will definitely persevere with this. then will tackle the getting into bed with me issue.

dcb · 16/01/2007 09:17

also meant to say that there hasn't been too much crying which i'm glad as i can't bear to hear her cry and would readily give in. may just have been a flukey couple of days though.

becksmummy · 16/01/2007 10:38

Well done DCB!!! Its great to hear it is working for you!
from what you have said it looks like you have swapped the dummy for a muslin and am interested in how you did this, did your dd take to it straight away or did you have to sort of show her what to do? if she is sucking this instead does she not loose it in the night like she would a dummy?

Sorry for the questions but I really think weaning off the dummy is the solution, great to also hear you didnt have much crying as that was putting me off!

becksmummy · 16/01/2007 10:41

also meant to say, I agree with the tackling one issue at a time, at the minute dd falls asleep in my arms and then I put her in her cot so need to start getting her into the cot awake but cant do this at same time as taking dummy away as I know this will just mean a lot of screaming!!!!!

sparkymummy · 16/01/2007 11:12

Hiya becksmummy, we are trying the same things here but in the opposite order. The sleeping in the cot, then when thats sorted we'll get to work on the dummy. Have borrowed No Cry Sleep Solution from library and that has advice for very gentle way to get rid of dummies but it is long process as she doesn't believe in letting baby cry

becksmummy · 16/01/2007 13:14

Hi Sparkymummy I have the no cry sleep solution book too but it seems a very long process which I didnt know if I could stick to, have you already started it? if so how is it going??

I havent tried getting dd to sleep in cot yet I have tried the suggested way to get rid of dummy but not been able to make it work!!

dcb · 16/01/2007 17:18

hi bm - late morning nap not so good - started to get into a rage - she does a good wildcat impression - so i gave in - but hey, can't expect her to just drop it like that so i don't feel too disheartened. we've been out in town today so afternoon naps in pram. i just gave her the muslin - she tends to put whatever you give her into her mouth to suck/chew (except dummies that is, otherwise there wouldn't be a problem...). i tucked 1 end of it under her bum and laid the rest on her chest so she could get to it easily.

will persevere with this anyway-will let you know.

oh and the ncss book. haven't tried the pantly "pull-off" as i'm not sure it would work with dd - i think i would just make her v angry. as for the rest of the book, we were doing most of it anyway (routines etc)- not sure there is anything in there for us at the mo.

sparkymummy · 16/01/2007 19:47

We've been putting DS down for naps as soon as he shows the first sign of tiredness and doing the waiting outside to get to him as soon as he stirs to extend naps as he never slept more than 40 mins ever! Both have meant daytime naps are much more successful. He even slept for an hour and a half the other day which is unheard of. We've also been putting him in his cot when very sleepy but not totally asleep which seems to have made him be able to get himself back to sleep a couple of times as he has sort of whimpered and then gone back to sleep, which he never did before either. Could just be his age etc but we feel the ideas are helping him. Not really started the pull off but will eventually (when we are feeling stronger and less tired!!)

becksmummy · 17/01/2007 09:46

Hi sm, sounds like you are doing well with the sleeping in the cot, I have tried putting dd down when almost asleep but it just doesnt work as soon as I lay her down she is wide awake again and have tried the suggested ways of settling but last night she was still awake 2 hours later!!

dcb, sounds like you are definately getting there with the muslin instead of the dummy, is she sleeping for longer at nighht now?

Dont know what i'm doing wrong but will keep ttrying as you are both doing so well hope I will get there eventually!

dcb · 18/01/2007 10:08

rough couple of days - the dummy has become our friend once again. dd is v. constipated - crying when she has a "rabbit" poo and passed a little bit of blood - now on lactulose. i've pulled a muscle in my back from holding her all the time as she is inconsolable with her bum and to cap it all ended up with a blocked duct as she wasn't feeding as much - agony. so the dummy stays for now. i did manage a night without it and she still woke up as often. we're on holiday next week in somerset so we're thinking of trying pu/pd whilst we're both together. 1 friend has had good results. anyone else tried this? not sure it's exactly what we had in mind for our "holiday" but don't want to carry on as we are.

becksmummy · 18/01/2007 10:13

Hi dcb, sorry to hear you are having such a bad time at the moment! I dont blame you for giving in to the dummy for the time being!!

Let me know how the pu/pd goes, hope it doesnt spoil your holiday!

Think i have got to get stronger with the night time dont know if you read my earlier post but I cant really do pu/pd as dd doesnt cry so think I may have to just let her stay in her cot for as long as it takes and hope she will eventually tire and go to sleep?

dcb · 18/01/2007 10:32

hi bm - what does she do then? does she wimper or fuss? not sure about dd with pu/pd as she doesn't stop crying when pu usually - but not sure if i just need to hold her for longer

becksmummy · 19/01/2007 09:03

I think dd would cry if I put her into the cot wide awake but what I have tried to do is get her really sleepy in my arms then put her in her cot to do the last bit herself, as soon as I lay her down she is wide awake but doesnt cry she seems to think it is playtime as she starts kicking her legs and rolling onto her tummy!

I tried just staying in the room and thought she may start to tire but 2 hours later and after turning full circle in the cot was still awake so I gave in and picked her up, she was asleep in my arms within minutes!

kiera · 31/01/2007 10:16

we had this with ds1 and someone suggested tying the dummy to a muslin square so he could find it more easily in the night - worked a treat. he soon learn to untie it so at one point we had four dummies one in each corner! he is now 3 and can find them ok without the muslin. i'm not worried about him having a dummy as he doesn't have it in the day unless he's napping (very rare these days) and since the introduction of the dummy at around 6 weeks old he has been a great sleeper, and still is, they are worth their weight in gold. wish ds2 would take one! he will only take the breast. ds1 was bottlefed from 7 weeks. hth!

becksmummy · 01/02/2007 14:50

Hi Kiera, how did you tie it to the muslin, did you tie it to one corner and left the rest loose or tie it all? just ask as it seems to have worked for you but someone had already suggested this to me but it didnt seem to work when I tried it!

dejags · 01/02/2007 14:54

I think the muslin idea was mine.

The secret it to tie one corner to the dummy and then make several large knots in the remaining cloth.

It makes it very easy for the baby to grasp. Did this with both of mine and it worked well.

My chidren are not allowed dummies at any time other than bedtime and sometimes in the car.

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