Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

Flip

Original poster

4 week old daytime sleep advice...

11 replies

WineandDine · 07/10/2015 18:36

DS is 4 weeks and won't sleep during the day, any advice greatly appreciated as I'm a FTM and finding it hard to cope.
He is ff (bf didn't work for us after a traumatic emcs) and feeds every 3-4 hours during the day and every 2-3 hours at night. He feeds pretty well but can become fussy halfway through the bottle and during the day he is wide awake after most feeds. I try to look out for the signs of tiredness and put him down in his moses basket (downstairs with me) as soon as I spot them but he cat naps for around 30 mins at best and sometimes refuses to go down at all. I've tried letting him sleep on me first before putting down, swaddling, rocking the basket, hand on his chest, white noise etc but nothing seems to improve his daytime sleep.
By around 5pm he is obviously so worn out that he does eventually sleep but by then I am completely worn out after trying to sooth him all day and I am starting to dread the next day of it starting all over again.
He isn't always distressed for all of the day, we tend to have the odd good day but I'm sure a baby of his age should be sleeping much more than he is currently (today he totalled 2.5hrs from 7.30am to 5pm)

He sleeps fairly well at night, goes down in his moses basket after his final feed at 11pm ish and wakes every 2-3 hours for a feed but generally goes back down fairly quickly.

I've been reading up on silent reflux and colic and wonder if he has either of these. I wind him during and after each feed and give him Infacol, we also use Dr Brown bottles.

HV hasn't been overly helpful and suggested I wind him more and give Infacol (both of which I was already doing!) and suggested trying to get him off to sleep by walking in the pram but I'm hesitant to get into bad habits.

Thanks in advance.

OP posts:

Original poster

WineandDine · 07/10/2015 18:48

Just to add that he doesn't show signs of 'normal' reflux. He keeps his feeds down and isn't it discomfort when he's laid on his back. Can silent reflux just occur at certain times of day? (i.e. during/after daytime feeds when he becomes fussy, arches his back, becomes stiff and distressed?)
He suffers with wind, has a poo every 1-1.5 days (which health visitor assures me is normal) but is a very noisy sleeper and generally seems quite nasally. He also sneezes and hiccups a lot which may or may not be connected.

Apologies for the long post!

OP posts:

Fluffy24 · 07/10/2015 19:04

I can only give you my experience - DS didn't really nap during the day (2.5 hours would've been good going) and was for 30 mins at a time, I know how wearing it is to be permanently on duty. We put him to bed at 6pm though (sometimes earlier) and though he'd wake for feeds every 2-4 hours it was good to have a child-free evening!

I just went with it, put him down for a seemingly ridiculous number of naps during the day and praying for bed time (by which point keeping him up long enough to see his father getting in from work was a nightly challenge).

But the good news is that by 7 months he had sorted it out himself, sleeping from 6pm-7am, a quick morning nap and, normally, a 2 hour afternoon nap (though sometimes just 2 x 1 hrs).

So I would stick with it, but if you can work at making the 5.30/6pm nap bed-time (maybe do a bath so it's obvious it's different), in usual night-time plac, and great any waking like you would a night feed, it'll help you keep your sanity!

randomsabreuse · 07/10/2015 19:12

Maybe consider some babywearing? Sling at least gives you the option to potter around and I find my 8 wo sleeps really well in it. Also good for keeping them upright post feed and it's not too hardcto extract them and put in the basket once properly asleep...

mintbiscuit · 07/10/2015 19:47

I think it's unlikely to be reflux from your post. I think it's overtiredness. Your ds sounds like a typical baby! Some babies need more soothing to settle than others. All mine have been difficult and I chose to carry them in a sling for the first 12ish weeks for naps. 4 weeks is still really tiny and instinct for them is just to be close to you all the time.

2.5hrs day sleep probably isn't enough. At 4 weeks my dcs would have only been able to handle 45 mins/1 hr of awake time (this included feeds). Literally it was feed, change nappy, quick cuddle and settle for nap for the first 6 weeks. Evenings they tended to be awake a little longer and feed more (and whinge more!). I would find a way to soothe and settle your ds - maybe rocking, wearing in sling, trying dark room and white noise - and then make sure you really limit awake time to avoid the cycle of overtiredness.

trilbydoll · 07/10/2015 19:51

Getting him to sleep by walking in the pram isn't a bad habit, it's a really good idea that will mean you're not trapped in the house by naptime!

Honestly at 4w what works one day suddenly doesn't work the next. I would go with whatever works (prram, car, bouncy chair) to resolve the overtiredness and worry about bad habits and routines later!

Original poster

WineandDine · 07/10/2015 20:23

Thanks all. Some good tips especially around putting him down for the night around 6 which we may try - thanks Fluffy
At the moment we're doing bath, bottle, bed at 6.30/7 and normally have to wake him for his bath. Could this in anyway be adding to the problem? Likewise waking him for the last feed at 11pm?
Mint i do try my best to soothe him & will give the sling another shot. At the moment I have no way of limiting awake time as I don't know how to get him off to sleep but hopefully we will get there.
I know I shouldn't compare our situation to others but i see friends with babies the same age who wake, feed, cuddle then drop off to sleep again contented whereas my DS is always so grouchy & doesn't seem interested in cuddles most of the time, presumably as he's so overtired.
Can't help but think I'm doing something wrong.

OP posts:

mintbiscuit · 07/10/2015 20:37

You aren't doing anything wrong! You are doing a great job! Some babies just need a bit more tlc from mum to get to sleep. All of mine were like this. Don't compare yourself to others either. You will crack this eventually!

FATEdestiny · 07/10/2015 20:45

I try to look out for the signs of tiredness and put him down in his moses basket (downstairs with me) as soon as I spot them but he cat naps for around 30 mins at best

Short naps are normal at this age - 20 to 40 minutes. Don't concentrate on time asleep, concentrate on time awake.

Instead of looking for tired signs, settle baby to sleep before those tired signs. Tired signs mean over-tired. At 4 weeks old babies want very little awake time before going to sleep again.

Nap (20-40 mins)
Wake
Feed
Nappy check
15 minute cuddle
See if baby wants any more of bottle that is left
Put down and settle back to sleep
Nap (20-40 mins)

Repeat, repeat, repeat

All of that ^ would be maybe 30-45 minutes or so awake,, that's all. Only a short 15 minutes is time when you are not changing/feeding baby.

This would also give your baby much more frequent daytime feeds, tiny babies have tiny stomachs so frequent daytime feeds can suit them.

EffinIneffable · 08/10/2015 02:51

I agree with the by the time he's showing signs of tiredness it's too late and he's actually overtired and more difficult to settle, at least that's how it works with my 8 week old ds. After a couple of days watching I realised he yawns after 90 mins of waking so I start trying to get him to nap after about 60-70 mins. Not that I am very successful at that with anything except the sling!

random what sling are you using? I have a moby wrap and there is no way I can get ds out without fully waking him up. But I must admit there are times when I just don't want to be tied to my baby for hours on end every day...

randomsabreuse · 08/10/2015 16:35

Close caboo is easy to extract but can also manage from the back up baby bjorn original so long as I don't forget to undo the little buttons.

Close caboo is just hands under arms and lift out and place in basket.

Sparrowlegs248 · 09/10/2015 04:52

I had the same problem and posted here for advice. DS would only nap on me and would wake every time i tried to put him down. I was caught up in trying to 'get stuff done' and in reality was getting nothing done and had a tired baby and was frazzled myself.

I concentrated on him sleeping any way he could for a few weeks. So if it had to be on me then so be it. He would also sleep in the car and the sling/carrier. Once he was sleeping better like that i started putting him down - taking him out of the carrier (Baby bjorn 'We' was easiest) or laying him down with the feeding pillow. Also at this stage he started tolerating the bounce chair and i could bounce him to sleep for short period.

We are now at the stage at 11wks old that he will fall asleep in the bounce chair for an hour or more, or i can put him down on the bed and he will sleep for up to 2 hours. Am going to start putting him.in the cot/Pam for naps this week. He will also sleep in the carrier for 1-2hrs and doesn't wake when i take him out of the car so will nap in the carcseat once we get home. Its a huge improvement but it took the initial 'effort' of establishing daytime sleeping by letting him sleep on me. Get a good book!

Flip