Can't sleep with my baby!

[MissTwister]

Try as I might I just can't sleep in the same room as my baby. I am constantly awake and every time I drift off, every little noise she makes seems me wide awake and alert.

I've taken to sleeping in the other room whilst my partner sleeps in with her. Is this bad for her health wise? What are the reasons we need to be in same room - I know it reduces SIDS but does anyone know why - and whether me being in another room will affect this?

Not sure what else to do!

My son was like a warthog, he was so loud and every noise had me jumping out of bed to feed him. I was stressed beyond belief. They do quieten down as the weeks go on. How old is your bundle of grunts joy?

Not an SIDS expert but as long as they are in with someone and following other rules, should be fine. Someone will come along and tell you. I think it's important to sleep near them for feeding cues but your partner can feed or bring to you for bf depending what you're doing.

Thanks for reply, she is 9 weeks, 5.5 weeks adjusted.

Yes he feeds her one expressed feed in night then wakes me up to feed so she's being looked after very well. I just feel so bad but not sure what else to do.....

Is she your first baby? Honestly, sleep becomes so precious the longer you are a parent that it does become easier to sleep more soundly with baby next to you.

Did you have problems being hyper-alert when trying to sleep before you had a baby? If not, trouble sleeping can be a sign of post natal depression. Even if not full PND, it does sound like general new-parent-anxiety and it won't last forever.

For practical advise, swaddling helps baby get into a deeper (quieter) sleep and a dummy is also useful for getting into a deep sleep.

For you, have you thought about foam ear plugs? Ear plugs won't stop you hearing her cry when she wakes, but it will block out the little noises and shuffles keeping you awake. Team this with an eye mask and you might find your senses dulled enough to sleep next to baby, but still being able to hear her when she wakes.

The Lullaby Trust is the leading voice in SIDs statistics. According to their website:

www.lullabytrust.org.uk/infographic

"Sharing a room with your baby can halve the risk of SIDS"

But sharing a room can mean either parent being with baby. It doesn't have to be Mum, it can easily be Dad.

Thanks Fate. Yes this is my first. I don't think it's PND as I sleep like the proverbial baby when in the other room.

I could try ear plugs in the same room but wasn't sure if this negated the being there. Will give it a go!

Anyone else got any thoughts/ advice?!

9 weeks is still young. It will ease. I think you're doing all the right things, splitting responsibility fairly so you're both doing a feed. Don't feel bad, as you say, your daughter is cared for and safe so just sleep as best you can. If you are rested that's the best thing for your daughter.

Hi I have a preemie 15 week old (8 weeks corrected) and when we first brought him home didn't sleep a wink. He was so very noisy grunting and neighing. Prior to having him I used to wear ear plugs to sleep.

However a few more weeks later I can sleep through anything, we have a Snuzpod and so he is right next to me but I must have magically got used to it and he is definetly quieter. It's something to do with sleeping deeper as they get older.

I think you should give it a few more times then see how you feel.

Would earplugs help? It will cancel out the snuffles/grunts but you will still be able to hear the cries.