What is causing the unsettled nights?

[myrtlemaggot]

My 6 month old DS has never been a great sleeper - he has always woken 2-3 times per night but was starting to show progresss, going up to 6 hours been wakings until 2 weeks ago when he caught a cold, since then he has been waking up every hour to 2 hours, and often won't go back into his cot - he'll fall asleep in my arms but is wide awake the minute he makes contact with the matress, or seems to be asleep but wakes 5 minutes later. (Despite the frequent wakings he used to always go back to sleep easily, and so did I!)

Is it the cold that has caused this - he now seems fine in himself and his happy and cheerful during the day. As well as the cold, in the last 4 weeks we have also started weaning him, been away for a weekend and he has had his pneumococcal jab. Is it a phase that will pass, and if not what should I do. I really really don't want to do controlled crying. Help!

Could be all of the above, also teeth at his age can start rumbling about. It mighjt be a phase but you might need to help him grow out if it. Try E. Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution.

I wouldn't do anything too drastic and confuse matters more. If you are willing to grin and bear it then he could well grow out of it and/or the underlying cause (whatever it is) could go away. I had a really rough patch for quite a while and am now coming out the other side - I didn't need CC, I probably could have fixed it sooner if I had but so glad I didn't need to.

Some thoughts are....
Does he appear to be hungry or in pain when he wakes?
Are you breast or bottle feeding him?
How do you get him back to sleep?
When does he first wake?
Is his room warm enough?
Does he have a favourite cuddly toy in his cot?

gotta dash but will try to help if I can...

I think he's probably got into a new habit after the cold. I doubt a cold room or whatever would cause it (ime children sleep better in slightly cold rooms anyway).

If I were you I'd leave it a week more to see if it's a phase/let him recover fully. then if he's still bad, try either pick up/pit down or controlled crying. pupd doesn't feel as brutal as controlled crying but is very hard work (basically you pick them up when they cry, then put down again the instant they go quiet)

(my qualifications: ds was a very bad sleeper and I tried everything. cc was the only thing that worked at 9 months. dd and ds2 have both always been great sleepers)

Thank you all for the advice, I had already been thinking of doing the NCSS and will also read up on PUPD. We actually had a better night last night - still 5 wake ups, but settled back down straight away each time and didn't seem so upset with the idea of his cot, so hopefully he is on the mend.

Popeye, the answer to your questions are:

-Not really in pain, just seeking reassurance, he does feed but more for comfort I think
-he is breast feed

• I get him back to sleep by either feeding or rocking him
• the first waking is normally about 10.30pm
• his room is quite warm and he never feels cold when I pick him up
• he does have his cuddly toy in his cot with him

Hi,
Just a couple of thoughts...

When he falls asleep in your arms - try to stir him before he goes down. Keep the light on or dimmed so he is more likely to stay awake. make a big thing of giving him cuddly toy maybe even having it between you when you feed him so when he wakes up and you're not there (a) he knows where he is and (b) at least teddy is with him.

Introduce/re-introduce dream feed if can. I found that when we starting weaning it was hard to get the right balance between food and milk and DD kept waking up to make up for shortfall in milk. I know the books say at 6mths they shouldn't need it but she did (she didn't read the books).At 9mths I started giving her a bottle of formula at dream feed and this helped alot - not sure if/when you were thinking of stopping b/f ? I just found that I stopped producing very much so she was genuinely not getting enough. As he's waking at 10.30pm anyway just try to make sure this is a BIG feed from both sides. After this, and depending on when next waking normally is, try to avoid feeding him back to sleep now you're confident he's full. Hard if you are shattered but it means that if you feed him back to sleep in the early hours at least you're not ALWAYS feeding him back to sleep.

To be honest though - as things haven't been normal recently I'd wait for things to calm down and providing you don't get into too many bad habits i.e. feed him back to sleep ALL the time(I think its ok to mix and match "bad" habits so rockings ok in my book ) then things could still work themselves out.

It sounds like your gut feeling is that he needs reassurance - maybe he should get it. You could maybe just let him know you are there by ssshhhing rather than feeding/rocking? If he's upset re cold/teething/holiday/jabs/developemental changes then when once he senses things are OK again he might settle down.....

Sorry if this all sounds a bit wishy washy but during my bad patch I posted on here and people gave me the confidence to go with it and that I didn't have to do CC if I didn't want to, and sure enough we got through it.

Thanks Popeye,

I will try to implement some of your ideas tonight, but I think what you have really done is confirm my gut feeling that I should go with my instincts not books or the health visitor. It is reassuring to know that other people think the same way so thanks for the moral support!