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At what age was your child able to just get themselves off to sleep after you leave the room?

16 replies

AvocadoLime · 31/07/2015 10:02

At bed time and nap time too, where applicable.

I'm just wondering for the future really, my DS is only 10 months. I used to baby sit an 18 month old who you could just read a story and sing a song with, put him in his cot, leave the room, you would hear him singing a bit and then he would go to sleep. I'm not sure if that's unusual though because his parents did hardcore cry it out (they were from the US, I think it is more common there).

My DS is still very much a baby (though I'm lucky that he's slept through for a while now), he breastfeeds (or is some times rocked) to sleep. Sometimes if he's overtired but fighting sleep he gets left to fuss for a few minutes and often it works but I'm not really very strict about it compared to some. When did you stop needing to rock or feed to sleep, if you did these things?

I am wondering if when children become verbal and able to understand stories, "good night, see you in the morning" etc it becomes possible?

I know some children take a long long time, but just wondered what your experiences were!

Thanks.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Asuperwittyquip · 31/07/2015 10:14

Mine were both about 3, they are now 6 and 9 and given the choice would both rather DH or me stay with them until they fall asleep. Although DS at 9 is starting to ask to read after I go down.

Asuperwittyquip · 31/07/2015 10:16

Forgot to add, I stopped feeding to sleep when I stopped breastfeeding at around 9 months but they were cuddled to sleep either in my arms whilst in the cot or me in bed with them until 3.
I still do bedtime story in their beds cuddling them.

BuyMeAPony · 31/07/2015 10:19

DD2 was about 3 days old, God bless her.

DD1 was shhd and patted for years. She was probably about 3 yrs when we could start to reason with her, say it was bedtime and consistently fall asleep on her own at night. Daysleeps were earlier. Probably around 16 mths when she went to one nap.

AvocadoLime · 31/07/2015 10:32

Oh interesting, later than I was hoping expecting then.

DS still needs some kind of motion to get him to sleep without feeding, he'd just wriggle and cry if I cuddled him in bed for very long. But already he makes my arms ache if I have to rock him in my arms, so it would become very difficult when he grows into a toddler!

OP posts:
WorldsBiggestGrotbag · 31/07/2015 10:33

About 15 months. We did a night of 'pick up put down' and that was it! Would have done it much sooner had we known it would be so easy, I cuddled her to sleep before that.

SellMySoulForSomeSleep · 31/07/2015 10:35

My nearly 14 month old gets put in her cot and will eventually go to sleep. I sit in the corner playing on my phone and leave when she is almost asleep. I reckon in the next couple of months I'll be able to dump and go leave her to self settle fully

Lj8893 · 31/07/2015 10:35

Probably about a year old for dd, she is now 21 months. However, she doesn't always fall straight to sleep and sometimes we have to go in and out of the room to settle her.

Kewrious · 31/07/2015 10:41

Around 18 months with the gentlest of sleep training. Co slept for a year while breastfeeding. But between 8-12 months taught him to fall asleep without the boob. Then at 12 months moved him to a cot in our room. First night he cried for 10 mins while I stroked his back, next night 3 minutes and then not at all. Then did a form of very gradual retreat between months 14-18 and by then we could do bath, milk, story, a big cuddle, 10 pats on his back and then leave him to it and he would fall asleep. Moved out of our room just after age 2 and sleeps without complaint in his own room. We have had roughly the same night routine since he was 2 weeks old and has never made a fuss about going to bed.

bishboschone · 31/07/2015 10:46

As babies . I always left mine awake with music .. Works a treat .. Even my prem poorly ds went off to sleep
On his own from pretty much day one .

Mulligrubs · 31/07/2015 10:46

My son has done this since birth - thankfully for me, because although up til a year he was easy to put down and would go to sleep himself, he would wake every 2-3 hours for a dummy! There was the odd time I'd have to rock him but that was not often at all.

Since 12 months(ish) I've been able to put him in his cot and leave the room and he has slept through the night. He is 21 months now and I know people with children his age who still breastfeed or rock to sleep, so I think it is very individual to each child.

CainInThePunting · 31/07/2015 10:58

I can't remember what age he was but he slept in my bed for probably the first year when I breastfed. When he did go into his own bed I was very strict with myself about consistency and did what I think is called controlled crying the days. He didn't actually cry but made demanding noises for a short while for a few days and then he just started going to sleep himself.
One of my favourite memories is of listening to him 'singing' himself to sleep.

Happilymarried155 · 31/07/2015 15:06

My little one from about 4 months, always did the same routine, had a story and feed them put him to bed. He normally talks to himself for ten minutes and then falls asleep x

GothicRainbow · 31/07/2015 15:10

My DS was about 10/11 months when we could leave him to settle. This continued until just after his 2nd birthday this May and now he needs us to stay in his room with him for bedtime (but is fine with naptime).

Archer26 · 31/07/2015 15:10

From birth pretty much. He has always preferred to fall asleep like this. I put him in his cot and put on his nursery rhymes and leave the room. Some nights we have to go up once/twice but most nights straight off.

He's 14 weeks now. I know we're lucky.

Paddingtonthebear · 31/07/2015 15:12

About 10-12 months.

lexyloub · 31/07/2015 15:37

All 3 of mine have self settled from very early on they'd have a bottle wind and put down into the cot awake they'd sometimes fall asleep straight away sometimes cooed and kicked about it 1st but I never got them out the cot. Ds3 is 5mo I've just started to put him down and walk out but more for sids reasons than he actually needed me there. I think sometimes you can pander a bit too much to them and they need to be left to some extent, my friends ds is 9 and he insists on her being in the room as he goes to sleep with her stroking his head and even wakes her in the night to turn his pillows over for him and make his duvet comfier for him I think this is ridiculous tbh

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