Daytime sleep routine for 5 month old

[shish]

My 5 month old ds doesn't have any set daytime sleep routine. Should he have one by now?? His Night routine is getting there - he goes to sleep during a feed at around 10ish and wakes up 8-8.30, with feeds in the night. You can't force him to stay awake in the day when he's tired, or force him to sleep when he's not. Will it automatically fall into place??

It sounds like your LO is doing really well. My 24 week old DS, eats when he is hungry and sleeps when he is tired in the day. It sounds like you know your LO pretty well and i bet he does have a "routine". Do you note down the times he does things - I bet he is doing stuff at pretty much the same time each day - maybe not to the minute but that isn't soooo important (IMHO). Don't worry about trying to get your LO to do things at the time books/other people say - if he is happy, thriving and healthy then that is great. My DS changes all the time - i have learnt to embrace these changes rather than worrying about them ... sorry if that sounds a bit patronising, it isn't meant to, but it is only when i stopped trying to bend DS into a routine that we both got a lot happier.

My baby is 20 weeks old and sleeps really welll at night ( 6 p.m. - 6- 7.30 a.m.) however day sleeps are a battle, he only ever sleeps for thirty minutes at the most but the probelm is that he seems constantly tired and grunpy as he has not had a refreshing sleep. This means if I stay in the house I have to try and get him to have naps every hour to one and a half hours. Does anyone have any advice on getting him to sleep longer? at a baby group today people were advsing me to let him cry and set sleep times, the latter of which I'm not convinced will make a difference as he sleeps at more or less the same times.

Shish, I agree with taylormama - I was constantly trying to get my DS into a routine and we're both much happier now I relaxed a little - I think they find their own 'routine' in the end and will start to do things at roughly the same times each day.

G3org3, I have the same problem, and so have other mums I've spoken to. I'm trying to put him into his cot when he looks as though he's getting tired and leave him there for an hour even if he wakes up first (unless he's crying and then I just get him up) so hopefully he'll get the idea that nothing exciting happens when he's in cot so he might as well go to sleep! Have you tried making the room really dark so its like his night time sleeps?

The only other thing that works for me is trying to go for a longish walk every day - he normally sleeps well in his pram so at least I know he's getting some sleep.

g3org3 - no advice, just to say my ds (15 weeks is the same, sleeps well at night but often in a foul mood during the day - he fights sleep to the bitter end! He doesn't have much of a daytime routine - if I try to put him down at the same times every day sometimes he will sleep, other times he will scream the place down in outrage at being put in his cot. Watching for his tired cues is really hard as he seems to go from alert to overtired in about 5 seconds. Will be watching this thread for advice...

I have this with dd. I read the "Baby Whisperer" and it really helped, but still struggle at times.
G3org3, that 30 mins business is in the book. It is because babies sleep cycles are about 30-40 mins long. It suggests waiting outside door just before the time they wake, and going in and settling them STRAIGHT AWAY. This is really important, leave it for a min or two and there is no chance. It does work very well. DD now slepps for 3 hours in morn, although ALWAYs wakes up after 40 mins, ansd sometimes 40 mins after that.
Afternoons are less succesful-things tend to get worse as days go on. DD usually absolutely knackered by bedtime.
There are other tips like patting and shushing, but it is hard work all the time, BUT it does work.

The book also talks about sleep cues which is really helpful, and wind down time. As I said it does work, but get really pissed off having to do it all the time

Thanks for all the messages. I've not really tried to set a sleep routine as I couldn't see how you could force it. I've been told babies fall into their own routine, but I just wondered. There are so many messages on MN where the baies seem to have exact times for everything from a really early age!!

My ds is the same as the others below. Usually only manages half hour naps during the day - whatever the conditions - so I just go with the flow.

Guess I wanted reassurance that this is normal and I'm doing the right thing

Fizzbuzz thats interesting what you say about the waiting outside then immediately resettling. I think I might have a go at that today.

If she doesn't resettle after say 5 minutes, do I then get her up or try again? Was thinking of resettling, waiting 5 mins, resettling, waiting 5, then getting her up. Any comments?

You are not meant to get them up before the end of the nap (minimum 2 hours). You are meant to pat them back to sleep at the rate of a ticking clock. I do do this but dd loves having her head stroked which works just as well.
When you put the down, you are meant to have a bit of wind down time before, eg cuddles books etc
Also babies under 3 months can only go about 1 and 1/2 hours without a nap. At 4 months they can go a bit longer about 2 hours. Have so so been there with never ending grizzling
Dd is not predictable in nap or feeding times, so I just use the 1 and 1/2, 2 hour thing. This is a pretty good guide. When you realise this it makes reading the sleep cues much easier.
i sorted dd out at about 9 weeks, but it was v hard work. For 2 weeks I rarely went anywhere and spent all that time trying to make her learn about napping in cot. Very tedious, but it did work. Also spent the first week sitting outside her bedroom, waiting to go in at first sign of a murmer. Again very boring, but it did work.
I don't think you have to as strict as that, but I became OBSESSED by it.
She is much much better now, but STILL wakes up after 40 mins, and woe betide if I forget, because then she is wide awake and grumpy. Absoulte instant response is the thing.
Don't leave them to cry at any point, as they just get worked up. Sometimes leave dd now to grizzle herself to sleep when I put her down, but always have to intervene after 40 mins. Leaving her to cry then doesn't work.
It's all in the book and does work, but cannot ever let vigilance slip, as she returns to type straight away.

Just re read your message.

They should go back to sleep pretty fastish if you get there early enough. Don't do 5 mins and then walk away, and then another 5 mins etc. The aim is to not get them worked up. Stick with it until dc falls back to sleep

Having said that 20 mins of patting can give you RSI (true!), and I sometimes get pissed off, when dd hasn't settled and then get her up, usual time limit is 20 mins. However if I do get her up she grizzles and it's back to sqaure 1 etc etc blah blah.....