Feeling low

[SenoraPostrophe]

Finally decided to "get tough" with ds's sleeping habits. The nights have been getting progressively worse - last night he went down at 9 (although he was obviously tired at 8 and I started trying to get him to sleep then), woke up at 10, again at 12 (and was too tired to feed so kept up a cycle of feed/sleep/wake up screaming 2 mins later till 1.30), then at 3 (at which point I brought him into bed with me so don't know how many times he woke up after that - lost count). Then he woke for a half-asleep breakfast at 6.30.

In short, not enough sleep for him, me or dp. He even woke dd at one point, but she went back to sleep, bless her.

So this morning I'm trying to get him to sleep on his own in order to break the pattern. Since dd is only small (she's 2 in a fortnight) I have been putting him down for his daytime naps in the spare downstairs room in his pram and rocking him to sleep - that way I don't have to leave dd, and she can "help". But it occurred to me that it might help if he learns to asscoiate sleep with his cot and being in a dark room. So this morning as soon as he was tired, I put him in and left him. He screamed for 10 mins.

Now he's asleep for his second nap, having screamed for half an hour (but I was stroking him and shushing him for at least 20 minutes of that). And I feel really mean - but it did have to be done. I tried pu/pd a couple of weeks ago, but he just screams in my arms if I do that, and keeps screaming.

That's all really - just wanted a moan. But what do you all think about the plan for tonight? should I feed him to sleep as usual or stick with this getting tough business until he gets the idea?

How old is he Senora? I think that will determine the level of toughness as much as anything.

Hi SP,
Read this earlier,went away to contemplate, and have come back..
I have 2 DD's - both of which had completely different sleep patterns as babies.
If it were me now I would decide on a "convenient" bed time - convenient to your other DD's routine and to you.
I would establish a bath/feed time and then try to settle to sleep. AS you say, 8/9 pm is too late for him.
How many feeds is he having a day
I would also put down to sleep in the day in his cot, ie cot = sleep IYSWIM.
After re-reading this it makes me sound like GF. I neither love or hate GF. I found her book useful with DD2 BUT tended to take the principles of regular day time milk intake, regular daytime sleep, regular bedtime/routine and adapt it to my own daily life and the needs of DD1.
DD2 use to become overtired and then would be dreafully difficult to settle druing the following night time.
I do hope you mamage to sort it out...good luck

apologies for the typos's - typing quicker than my brain...

sonnet - thanks.

It is a self-feeding cycle. He gets a crap night's sleep, is grumpy, doesn't sleep properly, gets overtired and then gets a crap night's sleep.

That was why I decided to try to do something about it now, rather than wait for it to get worse. He's 16 weeks (dd was sleeping through at this age - I don't expect him to do that, but 3 lots of 4 hours sounds like heaven just now! ).

I take GF in a very general way too - he always has a nap 2 hours(ish) after getting up and he has had a regular bedtime of sometime between 8.30 and 9.30 since he was about 3 weeks - this fits as dd goes to bed at 9 (remember this is Spain! - that's a v early bedtime).

The better days are the days when he sleeps an hour and a half at the first nap - I don't wake him. But he hasn't done that for a couple of weeks now. Today he had an hour, then 3 half hour naps in the afternoon.

Anyway I went with leaving him at bedtime. Well, I left him for 2 mins while I put dd to bed, then stroked him while he screamed. 10 minutes. Hope it gets better tomorrow!