2.5-year-old napping in minutes, and taking HOURS to go to sleep at night

[EggyBreadAndBeans]

Hi

Am posting again re: ds's sleep habits ...

Ds - 2 years 5 months - usually settles for an early afternoon nap quickly; within about 10-15 minutes of us snuggling down together (we co-sleep). BUT, on a day when he has napped, he takes a long time to go off at night: always over an hour, often closer to two, and tonight nearer three.

I turned the lights out at 7.15pm tonight, and after several episodes of pretty grim, out-of-character behaviour (hurting Mum, saying he doesn't like me, shouting that he does not need a sleep), ds finally nodded at 10pm. I was in , pretty and sooo fed up by then.

I thought, when a toddler was ready to quit their nap, they just didn't fall asleep for it - rather than what ds's doing. And I also thought most kids still nap at 3, so I wasn't expecting to be wondering about this just yet!

I trialled a no-nap week last week and mostly, ds zonked out by 7.15pm every night, and really quickly. He woke after 8am most days, and only had one day of being especially ratty in the evening. But I'm wondering if this evening's horrible and unusual behaviour was due to ds becoming really overtired having not napped for a week.

So, any thoughts? Nap to stay or go?

Thanks all. EBAB

Thanks SittingBull. Yes, we're doing a similar thing to you. Shorter nap (yesterday's was 1.5 hours, up by 2.30pm) - and asleep by 10pm at night! When ds doesn't nap, he is also out by just gone 7pm.

Like you, I thought most three-year-olds still nap, so I wasn't expecting this yet. I wondered the other day, because ds is a big lad and a chatterbox and often gets mistaken for being a year older, if he's maybe reached that stage biologically/developmentally/whatever already. I don't know - but I do know I am not having a repeat of last night again! Today I'm trying no nap again, and will do for the week, with quiet time (with milk, blanket and book/telly) in the middle of the day. We'll see ...

Thanks for your advice. I hope your little one continues to sleep so well for a while yet.

EBAB

Since my daughter was able to climb out of the cot at the age of two - bedtime has always been around 10pm.

Sometimes a bit sooner - sometimes a bit later! 12pm has been known. Any earlier sleep from a withdrawal of the daytime nap leads to wakenfulness from 4am in the morning.

She is now nearly 3. She gets up at 7.30am. Nap 30min at 1.30pm - otherwise she hangs at 6pm and gets up at 4am. Bed at 10pm.

I have tried absolutely everything. Less daytime sleep. More daytime sleep. Earlier mornings. Lots of excercise. Less excercise. Baths. Stories. Less TV. More TV. More milk. Less milk.Staying in the room adamant for up to an hour. Silent. Shouting. Even sedation once - which was paradoxically worse. I am exhausted and have not watched TV hardly for a year. I cant do the tying the door thing.

Absolutely nothing will alter it. Her father was the same. There may be a gentic element to the sleep routine.

She also is quite stimulated. We have moved to Switzerland. She goes to a French nursery. She has lived in three homes. We have travelled a lot around Switzerland, France and Italy. She is an only child. She has been skiing. She loves life ...

It could be these things. I have racked my brains. But - I do tend to decide that it is JUST THE way it is. Not to have endless nights of screaming and crying and misery. Maybe she is so strong-willed that she has out-exhausted me? But - even finally managed earlier nights will lead to very early mornings ... which doesn't uphold that theory.

I wonder, though, if it is a bit more common than we think? It is hard to admit than your child wont go to bed. You feel like you have somehow failed. That you might have an exhausted, weary-eyed child that has won over its weak parenting.

Well. If its any consollation -mine is very lively and healthy. Just has an adult sleep pattern! Any advice would be really useful though!!

My dd has been doing this - and she isn't quite 2 - even if she has half an hours sleep she takes an hour or more to go to sleep at night (and usually requires back rubbing).

So, I have dispensed with a daytime sleep and it works fine.

DS is 2.9 and still has a nap 3-4 times a week, but doesn;t really need one every day.

From friends who's DC have already dropped their nap, one of the main signs was they were taking longer and longer to fall asleep at night.

Most people have a natural dip after lunch when they feel sleepy, so I think most toddlers would nap then, but it's the staying awake in the evening which becomes the problem.

I thought DS was going to drop his nap about 3-4 months ago when he stopped going to sleep after lunch, but afetr a week of no naps at all he was such a horror, that I went back to it.

If I was you I would try dropping the nap for some of teh time, letting him have one a couple of times a week so he doesn't get dog tired.

blimey, ds hasn't had a daytime nap since he was about 2.3 - is always ded to the world by 7pm ... I'd guess he's ready to drop his nap - does he seem tired at (eve) bedtime - ie do you think the tantrums are tiredness or 'what the hell are you doing woman, I want to play not sleep'???

I am having a similar problem with my nearly 2 year old
Yesterday he had a long nap > 3hrs and we finally got him to bed at 9pm
Today's nap was shorter but alas he is up still

He will go to bed fine then approx 30mins later we have crying

Do I really have to ditch the daytime nap in order to get peace in the evening?

My dd gave up her daytime nap at around 18 months but she goes to sleep wonderfully at night.
(doesn't always stay in her bed all night but you can't have everything)

same problem here, ds 2.3 years can have a 20min nap in the afternoon then wont go to sleep till 10pm and thats hardwork to get him off.

today i just managed to keep him awake till 5.45pm and hes been asleep since, im just hoping he wont wake at 9 and be up till 2am

Why not play it by ear?
If he is particularly tired one day, let him nap, if not then keep him going.
I only say this because it was around this age that my ds stopped wanting a day time nap, so i followed his lead and maybe every other day he had a sleep.
I did this for a few weeks then cut it to every 3 days or so.
TBH my boy is ready for his bed at 6.30~7pm each night any way so if i kept him up any longer then he would be evil in mood and temper.
Just follow his lead.

I'm hoping it's just a passing phase or that he's trying to stay up to see DH
I'm pg and could do with an afternoon kip myself so don't really want to lose the nap