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Anyone done/doing Shush/Pat with their newborns?

9 replies

MAZinOZ · 10/11/2006 23:56

Have read baby whisperer and have tried desperatley to absorb the teqnique, do you shush/pat until they are asleep, until quiet? And how long does it usually take, anyone had experience in using it? Need inspiration to keep doing it. Nearly 6 weeks DD totally associates BF with sleep and feeds poorly, hence grumpy, hungry and dosen't sleep. Have been giving her formula which has really helped, sad about not BF but It's been just awful in our home for last 6 weeks.

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hamstermunker · 11/11/2006 00:00

Are you trying to get her to sleep through?

IMO there's nothing wrong with them associating bf with sleep at this age.

Sleep deprivation is awful, but she's still very little.

MAZinOZ · 11/11/2006 00:55

Don't care if she dosen't sleep thru, I accept that she needs to feed regularly, her best night has been 6 to 1130 then awake at 5pm and I was absolutley thrilled. I want to teach her to go to sleep without being fed.

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Chandra · 11/11/2006 01:06

MAZ, I can not help but smiling everytime the shush/pat thing is discussed. There is no much science to it, you just pat your baby on the back as if you were burping her and follow the rhytm with a repetition of "Sh".

As for poorly feeding, I might be bombarded for what I'm ging to say but... when DS was that age I tried to keep him awake while feeding him just to ensure he had a long feed (hind milk thing, etc.), it helped a lot, although I have to say that keeping him awake was not perticularly easy.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 11/11/2006 01:15

MAZ she is too young - IMVHO to learn anything. She is a bundle of insticts atm.

Apparently, due to developmental type things - babies can't pick up bad habits as such before 12 weeks anyway.

B/feeding her, and her falling asleep is not terrible. It really isnt.

Tidders · 11/11/2006 09:54

I also tried shush pat at 6 weeks and just found it totally distressing. One night I spent 3.5 hours doing it! In the end we gave up, chilled out and bought him downstairs with us. Meant we were all very tired but happy. Don't worry, by 12 weeks it all starts to get easier. You have to accept that newborn babies aren't very good at sleeping at first and find a way to relax and enjoy your baby. I'm still having problems at 11 weeks but life is soooo much easier and I always b/fed mine to sleep. He has for the last 2 nights gone to sleep by himself with no tears despite 11 weeks of rocking, feeding, swings etc! I agree with previous post...too young to worry about what books say! These blooming books !!!!

oops · 11/11/2006 10:02

Message withdrawn

LucyJu · 11/11/2006 10:19

I used shush/pat very successfully.
It usually took about 15-20 minutes for dd to fall properly asleep.
When she was tired and getting tearful and grumpy, would take her to a darkened room and shush/pat her on my shoulders until she started to relax and nod off. Kept going after she appeared to be asleep because she would often startle after 5 minutes or so. When this happened , would reassure her, and carry on shushing and patting until she nodded off again.
Then I would try gently putting her into her cot, still shushing and keeping patting her as she was lying down. Gradually let the pats get lighter and lighter until I was just shushing. If she stirred, would go back to gentle patting.
Once she had lasted a couple of minutes without either shushing or patting, I would leave the room.
My main tip for using this method would be:
be prepared for baby to stir or startle a couple of times whilst they are falling asleep and shush/pat thenm through this. Withdraw from them very slowly and gently - if they seem to be stirring or getting at all distressed, pat a little firmer. Keep the heel of your hand on the baby's body all the time, so they can always feel your contact.
Within 2 weeks of starting this method, dd would go to sleep quite happily in her own cot without any need for the shush/patting. Continues to do so today.

jambot · 11/11/2006 20:32

This worked well for me from the start. DD slept on her side between wedges which made it very easy for me to pat her bottom. Used to pat and sshh at the same time until she seemed calm. Tried to stop before she fell asleep, but sometimes it was easier to carry on until she was out for the count, especially if she'd been really grizzly. That, along with a very fixed bedtime routine enabled me to start putting her down happily awake and let her go to sleep on her own from about 10 weeks. I also introduced a tag blankie from early on to act as a comforter and now at 20 months, she uses that to help get herself to sleep.
You'll find with the patting thing that you'll pick up when it's not going to work that particular time. I could tell from DD's crying if she was just grizzling or really upset. If they're really upset, I found no amount of patting and sshing would settle her. I would then pick her up, walk around in a darkened room for a bit unti she'd calmed down and then put her back in her bed.
I also didn't have a good time with breastfeeding, but felt guilty for one split second until DD responded so well to the bottle and that feeling soon evaporated.

MAZinOZ · 13/11/2006 00:20

Thanks everyone, we are going pretty well with the settling so far, getting on the routine has helped.As for the BF, I would have happily fed her to sleep, but she was literally AWAKE ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT. I have a 3 year old DS also and I was so totally totally knackered and never been so miserable in my life. I've kept my milk going and now give her both breast and bottle, life is a bit nicer! My best to you all and your bubs.

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