7 1/2 month old won't sleep- controlled crying?

[TiredEuansMum]

My DS has never been a good sleeper, would only sleep on the boob/in the car early on, and then would wake 3-4 times a night to feed until he was 6 months. We tried delaying feeding which worked a treat and over the last few weeks he had slept much better, even sleeping through for 4 nights. But things have broken down again in the last week. He goes down no problem but wakens sometime between 10 and 2 and then after I feed him takes 2-3 hours to settle. I thought it was teething at first but he will go back to sleep if I stay with him, it's when I leave the room that the problems start. He self settles really well for naps, sometimes grumbles a bit but can get himself off to sleep after a couple of minutes.

All my instincts tell me not to do controlled crying but I'm getting a bit desperate as DH works away a lot so I'm in my own during the night and I have a very stressful job. Any advice gratefully received!

I meant to add- during the day he's the happiest, brightest little button and I'm terrified doing controlled crying will change that!

My 9 month ds was similar settle if I was there would fall asleep then 10-15mins later cry and we would cosleep rest of the night. We did controlled crying and within a week he was sleeping through. It's also helped with naps as he struggled to settle by himself!

I'm really against CC.
Have you tried co-sleeping or having hit cot in your room? He is very young, pleased don't try to break his little spirit.
I know sleep deprivation is horrendous but remember this too shall pass

Silly typos, been up all night with poorly baby girl

Co sleeping saved our bacon, at that age both of mine were pretty frequent wakers and having to get up killed me so we coslept - with the first after a few months but the second straight away. My first is now four and a champion sleeper, the second is nearly two and we are working on it ....

I had to use cc since i was going back to work and the baby was a really bad sleeper. We felt like the worst parents in the world bu letting our baby cry. But now he sleeps like an angel :)
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I did cc with my first, (the Jo frost one where you leave them 2 mins, then 4, then 8 etc) worked brilliantly, slept through night 2 and still does aged 2. He was 7 months.

Did it with my second, at 8 months, and she totally panicked and threw up and then turned massively clingy during the day with quite bad separation anxiety. I felt bloody awful.
She's 9 months now and back to normal self.

So if you'd asked after my first id say yes, go for it! But now....I wish I hadn't done it with the second.

Disclaimer - I was outside the door the whole time and as soon as she sounded panicky I went straight in and didn't leave her again. She is now sleeping much better but comes into my bed from about 5am. And I still feel awful about leaving her.

We've had to do CC too for the simple fact that DD is 11 months old and I'm expecting DS in 2 months. Co sleeping was a no go unless me and DP don't want to share a bed for the next 2 years (no thanks!) we did it about 3 weeks ago and I have to say it was the best thing I ever ever did. DD no goes for naps in her cot during the day with no fuss and up until recently (as she's a bit poorly with a cold) she's pretty much been sleeping through and goes straight in her cot at night with her teddy. I don't think it breaks their spirit at all and in all honesty DD is much happier than when she was afraid to sleep in her own cot. You can tell this from how she is during the day too, she's a much brighter little girl I say go for it but you must stick to it otherwise that's when the mixed messages come in and you just end up confusing them which makes it a whole lot worse for all of you involved. My DD was going in her cot no crying from night 4 and sleeping through.

I forgot to put as well that what works for one child may not necessarily work for all. Unfortunately a one size fits all theory doesn't apply with babies and sleep! By all means try it but if you don't get the results you want then try something that works for you and DC

Thanks for the replies... We used to co-sleep when he was small but I moved him into his own room as I felt like I was disturbing him. He did start sleeping much better when I moved him. I've ended up bringing him into my bed the last few nights when I've got desperate! But it doesn't seem to make much difference. He still cries for ages....

Thanks pixiechops. If you have the time and energy would you mind telling me how you did the c&c? I've read different things about leaving them 20 minute intervals which seems like a lot... Thanks x

Thanks wizard.. That's what I'm worried about! He is just such a happy wee guy during the day...

We did the same as the poster above - cc but making sure we went in every 2 mins, 4 mins etc. when he was 6 months old. The first night was difficult but after that he has slept really well - it improved his nap settling loads as well. I made sure my husband was about every evening for the week we did it, so deffo worth getting support from someone else. We had co slept before that for 6 months which was lovely but we were all ready for a new arrangement. Xx

Hi, Just wondered if he had any symptoms of cows milk protein intolerance as this can cause night wakings/difficulty settling - other symptoms can include eczema, reflux, lack of enthusiasm at feeding time etc. We had this with DS2 - he'd only ever fall asleep on a feed and then wake every 2-3 hours thereafter, was "colicky" and refluxy but only at night and some nights, he did sleep through. I had a very similar starting point to you but cc would not have worked as there were underlying issues and reasons for his night waking. We did cc with DC1 so am not opposed to the idea. Just wanted to raise the possibility of an allergy as it took us months to get DS2 a diagnosis and I wish someone had flagged up the possibility earlier as I'd put all the symptoms down to individual things. Hope things improve soon for you soon either way and good luck!

I had wondered about that as he is allergic to bananas and I have quite a few food allergies. The HV is coming to talk to me about it in a few weeks. Did you go through your GP or how did you get the allergies diagnosed?

I have a Euan - great choice of name and spelling

I would say that if sleeping was better a week ago and then it changed suddenly this week, that it is unlikely anything is broke and nothing needs fixing. The problem will probably resolve as suddenly as it started without any of the need for distress and upset.

I understand the feeling that you have "broken the baby" and that sleep feels like it will never be good again. But honestly, if it was fine not very long ago then it will go back to being fine in not much time at all.

Coping strategies to get through these blips are a better plan, that large-scale sleep training.

My Euan (now 5 1/2 years old) still on occasion has periods of poor sleep. When he's poorly or for whatever reason. We might have him in with us several nights over a week every now and again. But soon enough he goes back to his normal (very excellent) sleeping habits.

These inexplicable short-term periods of poor sleep happen, and will happen for a long time to come. They don't last for long though.