Problems with 3 week old

[lozzy1982]

Hi ladies, i have an adorable 3 week old baby boy whom i am breast feeding. So i know my nights are gonna be really disrupted and im fine with this. However, he hates hos moses basket. Last night he would just not go into it. He sleeps in it ok in the day. But last night, and on others, he had a good feed before bed. I think, yes! Hes gotta go down now. He falls fast sleep on me, but as soon as his head hits the moses basket all hell breaks loose. Weve tried swaddaling, making a nest with muslins and towels, putting a hot water bottle on the matress to warm it up, waiting longer for him to settle after a feed before putting him down, nothing seems to work. Last night we only got through coz i let him stay next to me in bed after hos feed. It is becoming a real stress point and im not sure what else i can do. Any suggestions?

Lots of young babies like to sleep next to their mums - less than a month ago he was inside you, after all :)

If you are happy with this and accept it as normal, then check out the guidance for safe-co-sleeping.

If you are not happy and don't want to accept it, then....um, life will be a bit harder for you. IMO :)

Congratulations!

I had the same problem. We solved it by co-sleeping and it was a great to be able to sleep! The only other option we had was to hold DS through the night. He just wouldn't sleep in his basket. Co-sleeping isn't for everyone and I never thought in a million years would I do it but it was well worth it.

What tiktok said!

It won't last forever. I got mine out of our bed and in his cot by 5 months,

Bad form tiktok to make the OP feel such pressure to accept your opinion:

If you are not happy and don't want to accept it, then....um, life will be a bit harder for you. IMO

No it won't. Not at all lozzy

If co-sleeping is stressing you and/or you don't want to, it's not a problem. There are loads of things you can do to help.

I never bothered with a moses basket, far too restricting anyway. This (IMO) is the reason why lots of babies don't like a basket or crib. Straight to full sized cot for us.

• Take one side off the cot and butt it up to your side of the bed. This makes it like an extension to your bed and allows for easy access to cuddle and feed while baby stays in sidecar cot.

• Sidecar cot + swaddle or sleeping bag for nighttime. Bouncy chair for daytime sleeps. Easy peasy foot bouncing to sleep that allows for bouncing back to sleep if baby stirs.

• Dummy. Once feeding is established of course. May take some perseverance, but worth it for the babies well being and sleep.

• Swaddle. I'd preserver at this age. Like marmite some babies hate it and some babies love it. But at 3 weeks it is too soon to give up on what will be an excellent sleep tool for the newborn weeks.

• Feed, feed, feed. Almost all sleep problems at this age are down to feeding issues or a desire to suck (hence the dummy)

Absolutely no reason that you should feel you must accept co-sleeping. No need at all and it is wrong and bad that anyone (here or elsewhere) should make you feel you will need to.

I 2nd what fate said don't give in to co sleeping just yet it will take perseverance but imo co sleeping should always be a last option purely for safety reasons. Your baby is brand new it takes time to get settled into a routine that suits you both. Try the things fate suggested,with regards moses basket my ds was the opposite I wanted him to go straight into a cot but he didn't settle at all and seemed to prefer the closeness of the moses. Every Child is different you just need to work out what suits you both in the end that may well be co sleeping but personally I'd try other options 1st. Try putting a t shirt or vest you've worn over the moses mattress it will have your smell on this may or may not help your dc settle if they can still smell you.

I did the same as Fate, made life so much easier. Don't think DD felt secure in her wobbly basket, hated it all the time.

Sorry to have committed a bad form, or whatever the expression is :)

lozzy, I hope you didn't feel actual pressure....this was my opinion as I made clear.

I am sticking to it, but it is, of course, only an opinion and all FATE's suggestions may well appeal to you more.

Co-sleeping is not unsafe, if guidance is followed. No need for it to be a 'last' option on safety grounds.....:(

Congratulations on your new baby! Mine did not want to go down in his moses basket either. They just love being curled up on top of you, which is lovely for them but not so lovely for you if you're exhausted at 4am and all you want to do is sleep! I eventually bought a bedside crib which allows you to have him sleep next to you as if in the same bed, only a lot safer. Also white noise really helped us. There are several free white noise apps that you can get for your phone or tablet. The vacuum cleaner was a winner for us - I didn't like the noise but I did like that I was getting some sleep :)

Good luck!

I found the book 'Save Our Sleep' by Tizzie Hall really helpful.
She showed me how to tell which cries are 'feed me/I really need you' and which were more 'I wanna be hugged til I sleep'.
A friend recommended it to me, I followed the sleep advice to the letter (and used the weaning/health advice as necessary) and it really worked.