2nd baby sleep problem again!!

[PreemieBlessing]

I once posted on MN and was hit with backlash re Cio, well here I am again with issues with my second baby lol! My eldest sleeps through after letting him CIo. My second baby was also a premature boy (6 weeks early) and I vowed never to bring in bad sleep habits (ha)! Here I am in exactly the same position. Baby came home after 2.5 weeks at hospital, was fine to self settle until boom, COLIC!! this was 3-4 hours of solid crying every evening till midnight. Now the crying has gone down but because I was exhausted from the crying, he'd end up sleeping with me. Now he still sleeps with me as I tried to settle him in his cot but he wouldn't settle. Hes 4.5 months old and I have been advised to let him self settle but he screams blue murder! I tried in 3 naps today and he cried for 40 mins on first two naps, 5 mins in final nap, 10mins at bedtime but he then woke up after half hour and cried for almost an hour. I felt so bad and immediately took him, I just feel hes too tiny for this. I'm also worried he'll always settle just by sleeping with me and its obviously affecting my time with hubby. Hes a cat napper as well.

Should I sleep train him after hes on solids?
Why does he get up after half an hour and cry so much at bedtime?

I did sleep training with DD and it is difficult, however even when I struggled, I knew deep down that it was necessary. I hadn't felt like that when she was younger, but I hit rock bottom when she was about 7 months and I knew we had to do it. I'd say to go with your gut, whatever it says.

A baby who doesn't sleep affects a whole family, so do talk to your DH and make sure he understands that you are aware it is affecting your time together, that you know it is not a long term thing and that you are also being affected by impact it has on your time together.

Hey, I was in similar position. Sleep trained first baby at 5 months and he has been an angel ever since. Had second baby, also 6 weeks prem and was a nervous wreck about getting into bed habits (although neither baby has ever slept with us). I obsessed about schedules and routines for weeks etc, I even posted on here about it. Anyway I kind of decided I would just go with the flow- so hard for me. She started to get a little better on her own, about ten days ago I decided she was going in her cot at 7.30 awake. I did it and let her cry, went in after five minutes. Longest was 25 mins, last few nights I haven't been in and last night I didn't even hear a murmur and I have just got up with her. I think the above poster is right, sleep deprivation is bad for the whole family. The crying is protesting to change- as long as you pop in to reassure the baby then he will be fine.

There are lots of people on here that will say it's a terrible things to do etc, but those people may be perfectly happy to have their children in their beds until they are 2 or 3 which in my view isn't healthy. My eldest is a loving, well adjusted, confident, clever and sociable boy- I don't think a week of letting him cry at bedtime did him any harm. Last night I even got a cheeky smile from my baby girl when I put her in her cot!! I think just try not to think about what others think, be consistent at bed time and it will all fall together.

I must add I don't do it for naps- I'm out all the time, so at the moment she catnaps where she likes!

X

Not sure how to do links, but try reading this, it's a great summary of why babies are not designed to sleep through - not too extreme, either, just solid facts. Good luck! Sounds really challenging. www.buzzfeed.com/patricksmith/its-evolution-baby