Self settling - is it possible?

[LittleMissPear]

My DS is 7 months, he is ebf. He doesn't self settle, ever. I feed him to sleep every night and for any naps that aren't in a buggy or the car. His day time naps are very short (30 mins) and he wakes frequently at night and can't get back to sleep without a hug or feeding (although he is better now he's in his own bed). Do people think that he would sleep better/for longer in the day if I tried to get him to self settle? Or will it be a lot of trauma for not much gain? Any thoughts?

I do think that if they can self settle then yes, their night time sleep at least will be better, as if they stir awake they dont need you to get back to sleep.

Not too sure how to go about it, Ive been lucky and not needed to feed/rock mine to sleep, but I do swaddle, so that helps I think.

DS is a similar age and sounds similar in his sleep patterns. I don't think there's much you can do to genuinely get them to fall asleep alone if they don't do it spontaneously. ( sarahockwell-smith.com/2014/06/30/self-settling-what-really-happens-when-you-teach-a-baby-to-self-soothe-to-sleep/ is interesting) We are trying no cry sleep solution approaches to gently encourage him to find his crib a comfy place to fall asleep - it's slow but we're making progress without making bedtime stressful.

DS is a similar age and sounds similar in his sleep patterns. I don't think there's much you can do to genuinely get them to fall asleep alone if they don't do it spontaneously. ( sarahockwell-smith.com/2014/06/30/self-settling-what-really-happens-when-you-teach-a-baby-to-self-soothe-to-sleep/ is interesting) We are trying no cry sleep solution approaches to gently encourage him to find his crib a comfy place to fall asleep - it's slow but we're making progress without making bedtime stressful.

I could have written your post! My ds is now 9 months and has slept through the night (properly I mean...just stirring and self settling ) a few times now. Sadly he then got ill so we're back in the realms of light sleeping and frequent night waking. Hopefully we'll get back to the magic self settle again soon ! We did a few things which might be worth u trying : my partner took over the night shift ....that mean baby only got a cuddle, no booby, and was offered water, at night. This was to break the seemingly endless "need booby to sleep" situation. Brilliant for me after 8 months of night shifts (not that I can sleep through but at leastI'm in bed!). We also started giving baby a formula bottle (c7oz) later in the evening. ...c 10pm. He usually drinks it all so we figure a lot of the fuss may genuinely be hunger . And the other thing which seemed to naturally help was that ds started rolling himself onto his front to sleep. That was his first sleep through (though I was awake worrying most of the night!). He now has a preference to sleep face down resting on his arms and kneeling with his bum in air!? I guess whatever works! :-D

DS1 is just over 7 months and about 5 weeks ago now we were about to start controlled crying as he was waking continuously throughout the night. Miraculously the night we decided to start it, he self settled every time he woke (3 times), then same next night, same next night.....we had 3 weeks of not having to go into his room after we put him down at 7pm until 6.30am. He slept through the full 11.5 hrs 4 times, the other times he woke but self settled. Then he got a bad cold....still has a cough...and we're back to him waking again but not as bad as it was.

I think it's easier for a baby to self settle if they're bottle fed to be honest. I finished up bf at 5 months and although he was never a clingy baby, bottle feeding means he doesn't wake for the comfort any more. I just put a bottle in the cot if I need to feed him in the night. He also has 3 Ewan the Sheeps...yes 3...he loves them and I want to make sure there's one in reach at all times!!

I truly believe it depends on the baby! I have two DDs. The oldest would never self settle, always needing to be cuddled/fed to sleep. It's been a long road but we didn't rush her and she started self settling in her own time and I'm so glad I did it that way.
My second DD self settles perfectly, it was never taught, she just does (she refuses to be fed/cuddled to sleep!)

I could have written your post when DS was 7 months old. I had resigned myself to feeding to sleep. I have recently switched to formula and he does often fall asleep on the bottle, but will self settle at times.

He's always been able to go down awake at bedtime for some reason, but never at night wakings or naps. In fact naps were terrible I couldn't even get him in the cot without him waking for a long time.

What I do now is if he is still awake after feeding, I put him down on his front, as this is how he prefers to sleep, and rub his back. He'll usually go off soon after. I know it's not true self settling as it requires a bit of intervention but it's a lot closer than I was before.

He frequently wakes in the night and gets himself back off, but I think that has just come with time.

Sorry that was a lot of waffle and not a lot of advice. I guess what I'm trying to say is it's geting better, and hopefully will continue to do so with time.