No cry sleep solution

[ejecoms]

I'm posting here because I'm about to try the No Cry Sleep Solution to try to help my 6 month old's appalling sleep! I have co-slept and breast fed on demand since birth and she has now turned into the most terrible sleeper which is so frustrating as she used to sleep quite well even when very young.

I have never let her cry and got into the bad habit of feeding her whenever she stirs at night. I think also she is used to sleeping cuddled up to me and so she wakes frequently in the evenings until I come to bed with her. She also mainly naps in the sling again so she is cuddled up to me. I will do a sleep log today and overnight and post this tomorrow with my sleep plan.

Please nag me if I don't do this!

I've already done steps 1 and 2 of the plan. Today I'm working on step 3 - creating sleep logs.

My motivation for working on this is that I'll be back at work in August and I will have to do nights and evening shifts and I can't leave a baby who wakes every hour for a breast feed with someone else at night.

Following....
I nightweaned DS1 at 13 mo and tried some of her tips for getting him to sleep at bedtime. I vowed I wouldn't get into same pickle with DS2 yet here he is at almost 5mo and almost exactly as you describe your DD OP.
Was going to reread her books (sleep and nap versions) and start something myself around 6/7mo.
Currently going through 4mo sleep regression with hourly if not more wakings at night...

Oh I'm so glad I'm not the only one! I thought I had learned from the mistakes I made with DS (now aged 4 and does sleep through the night!). He used to wake every hour to feed too!

So here's my sleep log from the last 24 hours:

Summary:
3 naps, total 2,5 hours
10.5 hours night time sleep, 8 night wakenings. Longest stretch of sleep 1,5 hours.
Total sleep 13 hours

The details:
8.45 asleep in sling - 9.58 awake. Couldn't do anything!
11.07 fell asleep while nursing. Slept on me. Woke at 11.11, rocked back to sleep - 11.50
14.58 asleep in sling - 15:38 woken by DS poking her

7.14 nursed in bed, detached, patted
8.42 cried. Rocked to sleep then woke and nursed
9.12 cried. Tried to rock. Nursed.
00:06 nursed
1.00 cuddled
2.58 nursed
4.01 nursed
4.19 cuddled then nursed
4.30 gave up at this point in attempt to get some sleep myself so had her cuddled right up with me and fed as much as see wanted. I had been awake since about 1 at this point so desperate for sleep
5.46 awake. Currently having a feed

Reread a bit of the book last night where it talks about how you have to want to change things and I think this is part of my problem: I love having her cuddled up in bed with me and part of me doesn't want to give that up. So I'm going to try to be really clear in my reasons for change:

• when I go back to work someone else will need to put her to bed and she won't be able to feed if I'm working a night shift
• my back is starting to ache from having her in the sling to nap
• I'd like to be able to go out in the evening or leave her with someone during the day
• I'd like to be able to spend an evening with my OH without recurrently being interrupted.

we have been doing ncss for about 6 weeks. it has some good ideas. ur lo may benefit from longer day time naps? easier said than done, tho. ds now usually unlatches himself and rolls over to go to sleep. not sure if it's helping. we had a period where I thought things were getting better, then things got bad again. we r now in a good patch, only 2 wake ups last night, which is amazing, and ds surprisingly has a cold. I am wondering if all the calpol is helping him sleep and there is another underlying problem making him wake so much. he is finally swallowing drugs instead of spitting them out and he can now have 5ml

That's why I like ncss. That she says If it works for you, it's fine. When it stops working for you, change it. And if you start changing something and it's not going well, stop and start again another day. It's ok.
None of this IF YOU GIVE IN EVEN ONCE ITS THE END OF THE WORLD!!!!!!!

ejecoms I could have written your post, except I have a ds. Watching with interest as I've been thinking of buying the book myself.

Hi all,

Thanks for your support and advice.

Beccus - you're right, I'm sure she does need longer naps. The Problem is that she usually sleeps in the sling when I go to drop off/pick up my DS from preschool and there is usually someone shouting or poking at her which wakes her up. I am going to borrow a pushchair from a friend and start to put her in that to nap. What ideas did you find most useful from NCSS?

Flipflops - you're right, she's very human about the whole thing, she really understands what it's like to be mum.

Rosiegal - I hope I have some success to report that will encourage you to use the book!

Night 1: think I was fairly successful with my plan. Put her down once to nap alone. Also, at night, I put her down semi-asleep rather than totally asleep. Kept to my plan overnight which is:
When she wakes/stirs/makes a noise:

1. Keep still and pretend to be asleep to give her the chance to settle herself
2. If she starts to cry, try patting/rubbing her first
3. If this doesn't work, feed her, but limit the length of the feed.
4. At the end of the feed, move away from her so we aren't in contact (I've currently got 2 single mattresses on the floor with her idea that she will sleep on one and me on the other.)

I've also bought a bedside lamp for my DS's room, so the room should be darker when we have books and stories. Now I'm going to have a think about our bedtime routine!

wel done! i thought the following was useful - advice re nap length and day time sleep, quiet time before bed, bedtime routine, b/f earlier in the bedtime routine, pantley pull off, trying to keep a vague daily routine.

Night 2: stuck to my plan well. She has started detaching herself and rolling away from me... Will often then roll back and have some more milk but I feel this Is progress.

I managed to settle her back to sleep without feeding her the first time she woke... And then she woke again 10 min later! I don't understand... I thought she should sleep for longer. Who know?

yes, that's good. u can let them relatch many times and it doesn't matter, u r just aiming for them not to fall asleep on the boob.

Night 3: terrible night. She kept waking up crying, which she never does. Didn't want to feed, would eventually be rocked to sleep. Totally abandoned sleep plan in attempt to get some sleep. Fed up as DS didn't go to sleep until about 9pm, DD woke at 9.15, DH is working this weekend so I'm on my own. Dreading the clocks changing. Dreading the Easter holidays.

oh no :( on bad nights u just gotta do what u gotta do. calpol/neurofen worth a try?

Thanks Beccus. I don't give Her calpol just because when I've tried it she spits it all out.

Another bad night. She has a cold. Fine during the day but waking crying a lot overnight. DS also waking coughing. Feel exhausted and that I'm back to square 1.

Can I join?

I'm back in work, breastfeeding, co-'sleeping' and potty training a 3 year old who is putting everyone through belated terrible twos in spectacular 'cutted up pear' fashion.

I am reading the ncss too but am just doing sleep logs that end up being front and back of a4 paper.

Should say I'm up with the 5mo not the 3 year old!

Do join in dajmibuzi! What's your sleep plan? I'm on night 5 now, and DS seems to have recovered from her cold - although she woke in the night, she didn't cry. She seems to be starting to unlatch herself so I'm feeling a bit more positive it will work.

I have learnt the following from using my plan:

• that my instinct is to feed DD as soon as she stirs. I find it really difficult to stop myself to see if she really is waking up
• because we sleep cuddled up together, any movement from one wakes the other. We have to get used to sleeping apart!
• sometimes I wake her up when I go to my DS in the night
• sometimes I get really uncomfortable but can't move because I don't want to wake her.

All these causes of sleep disturbance should improve quickly if I follow my sleep plan and move away from her after feeding her!

Night 6: truly appalling

Night 8: a better night but didn't really follow plan. I don't think I'm going to see any improvement at 10 day log...

I've been following the same routine of quiet play in a dimly lit room, dress in pjs and feeding to sleep at half7, lying with her til she falls asleep and then leaving her when she's been asleep a good 10 minutes. I'm happy to do it and I think she likes having me there thank God for mumsnet

I've done this for about 2 months and when dd started sleeping poorly I didn't know whether to change it or perservere but I'm glad I did plough on because she has started to sleep for longer stretches.

A couple of nights ago she did 8-4! Total fluke as last night she was back to every 2hour or so

Glad you had a better night ejecoms

Wow! 8-4! That sounds amazing!

Night 9 just over so I'm planning a sleep log tonight though I'm not expecting any improvement because she's had a cold.

Can i join in! I started the pantley pull off this week after dd began waking every hour

Night 1 - i think she fell asleep before i managed to remove it. Throughout the night she removed herself before falling asleep (wasn't expecting that!) and i alternated between boob and giving her the dummy and removing that. Because I've read that comfort feeding can lead to hunger feeds as the tummy gets used to eating every hour. She was in bed with me at 3am

Night 2 - took forever to get her off, but finally managed it after lots of rocking. She removed herself again throughout the night (??) dummy every other and she didn't come into bed with me for the first time in ages.

So im confused. She's removing herself throughout the night, does that mean she doesn't have a settling problem or that this won't work? She always wakes after each sleep cycle.

In planning on persisting for the 10 days to see where we get to, but is totally exhausting!!