Startling at every noise, hates cot, 5 months

[Applecross]

My dd is a lovely natured baby except that she will not sleep in her cot at all. She feeds to sleep in my bed about 8pm but she startles very easily if I move or make any sort of noise, even if I get up for a wee and then cries until I come back (getting increasingly distressed). This means I have no evening time as I have to go to bed with her & I need to study/start job hunting. She's 5 months and I'm wondering whether to do some sort of sleep training and what might work with the startling or whether to just wait for more time and hope she gets more relaxed.

You could train her to get used to noise when asleep by keeping the place busy and noisy when she is sleeping/napping.

It sounds like the wrong way around, that you should be quiet when baby is sleeping. But the opposite is more helpful.

I think it's not unusual with first borns to be light sleepers because they are used to quiet when the sleep. Once you add extra children, some toddlers and childrens TV into the mix with subsequent children, they are usually not such light sleepers as a result. Certainly true of my first born compared to her siblings.

Have you tried a white noise app? I understand it helps some babies when really loud - because it blocks out other sounds (like you going to the toilet etc)

The white noise is worth a try - oddly, she is a second baby and the first one was impervious to the dog barking and loved noise but dd2 startles when the dog barks, her big sister screeches etc - she's in the quietest room but that isn't quiet as we have quite a small flat and she just seems to have gotten totally freaked out by the noise and gets quite upset by it. Hopefully she will adjust but no sign of it lessening yet.