Please help meee

[justalilmummy5000]

My ds is 18 months old and an awful sleeper
He stays awake till 11/12pm some nights
If he doesn't nap he goes to sleep at 7 but is unsettled and wakes up to 10 times
If he does nap he stays awake till really late but then sleeps till morning where I have to wake him for school run and is the grumpiest being alive till he goes back to sleep and is almost impossible to wake. Which then Leeds to another night of being awake till late. I can't wash my hair can't iron can't get even an hour on my own

He's always been rocked to sleep I can't stop this if I put him in he's cot he screams and makes himself sick

How do I make this child sleep please help me!

Also must add controlled crying is very hard to do as he shares a room with 6 year old ds who I don't want to disturb he sleep as that's a whole new problem (over tired over hyper sort of thing) just want him to sleep through the night for once in he's small life!!

Your son needs to be sleep trained. He will be a much, much happier and brighter little boy if he is sleeping enough.

At 18 months old I would expect 12 hours at night - 7pm to 7am, and then at least 90 minutes nap at lunchtime. Your son is sleep deprived and without teaching him to get to sleep you are doing him a huge disservice. I don't mean to be unsympathetic here, but that is the bottom line.

So pick a sleep training method, and stick to it. He is going to scream and cry whichever method you use to teach him to sleep without you, so managing how that effects the rest of the family would be wise.

I would firstly recommend waiting until the Easter holidays, when your eldest isn't at school. Could you see if he could have some sleepovers maybe at grandparents house for the holidays? Then your eldest isn't impacted by the sleep training. If this is impossible, let him camp out in your bedroom for a week - make it fun and special for him (since his younger brother may get a lot of the attention for the sleep training week).

Also try and get your partner to have the week off (or two weeks) so that you can share the load and support each other. You may need time to catch up on your sleep in the daytime, so plan for lots of support and help being available.

Then just get in with it. Your son will be a much happier boy and will be thankful for you being able to apply some consistent and clear tough love to teach him how to go to sleep and stay asleep on his own.

That advice is child neglect. Appalling.

Urm, why?

Feel free to add your own useful advise caravanista13

Caravanista I disagree entirely. There's nothing neglectful about that post.

Fate isn't even advocating a particular method - that's for the OP to find. She's offered some supportive advice and solutions to the OP's barriers to sleep training.

Caravanista how on earth is that neglect?

I think that is excellent advice and I was going to suggest the same thing!

Good luck op! Sleep deprivation (for you both) is horrible and I hope that you take on board the advice and that things get easier for you!

I guess caravanista13 just read:

"Your son needs to be sleep trained..."

... and didn't actually bother reading my post or indeed the OP, just chose to be unnecessarily antagonistic on a thread where the OP (and her family) desperately need some help and support.

I actually went to search caravanista13's other posts because that post was so antagonistic that I assumed it was a troll post. But no. Maybe caravanista13 is just having a bad day today? Flowers for you caravanista13, no need to be so mean.

Agree with caravansta. Sleep training is needed.

It's actually more neglectful to let your child get into a state of extreme exhaustion and sleep deprivation, caravanista

Only on mn would sleep training a tired out 18 month old by a loving but knackered family be considered neglect! ffs.

Do as Fate suggested. Sleep training is hard but in your situation I wouldn't go for half measures and abandon it halfway through. The Easter holidays would be a good opportunity to get it sorted. If your LO is sometimes not going to sleep until 12 then being woken for the school run at maybe 8 ish then that's no where near enough sleep, as I'm sure you already know. Good Luck