Co-sleepers. What age did your DCs sleep independently?

[jobnockey]

Just a question for co-sleepers really. What age were your DC when they decided to start sleeping alone? My DS is 6 and always goes to bed in his own bed but inevitably comes through and gets in with us during the night. It's not necessarily a problem (DP sees it more problematically than me I think but only because of his perception of what is 'normal' rather than him disturbing our sleep). He's a single child and says he gets lonely on his own and asks if me and dad sleep together why does he have to sleep on his own?
I think that's a perfectly valid point to be honest!
He's only just turned 6 and I can imagine he might still be doing this for some time yet but just wondering what others experiences of this are. unless sharing the bed suddenly becomes intolerable I don't want to be going backwards and forwards to his room all night trying to'train' him. I would much rather it is just his decision that he is big enough to spend the night on his own... As long as it's before he starts secondary school or even I would have to start thinking that was weird!
Thanks in advance for any shared experiences...

Hahahahaha Mine are still there. 7 and 10. I don't mind really, but they are big and thus it is a bit of a squash. The 10 year old would sleep in her room, but not alone , she wants her sister too. Her sister will only sleep twined around me like a rhesus monkey. Recieved wisdom from a friend with two older dds who co-slept is that they moved out on their own accord at elevenish.

Fuck. Must make sure DP doesn't see this thread!

I am unintentionally co sleeping with my dc2, I was rather hoping (as he's a year old) that he might be happy in his own cot in the next month or two? Perhaps I should lower my expectations. (This is lighthearted!)

Hahahaha . Yes, lower your expectations. My friend's son only moved out of her bed at 8 because she was so vastly pregnant that he was too squashed to be comfortable. His new db was eventually forced out at 6 because my dear friend had had enough of co-sleeping with a wriggly small person. His solution was simply to go and sleep in with his big teenage brother instead!
On a more serious note, humans are designed to sleep together, sleeping alone is a very recent concept, and a very Western one. It might mean musical beds for a few years, but wherever everyone gets the best night's sleep is usually the best option. We are so hung up on the adults having one bed together and the children a bed each, but it is rather nice on a cold and windy night to be all cuddled up together as a family, like a basket of puppies. .

Couldn't agree more! I can't think of any other social mammal that allows its young to be separated from them whilst they are both sleeping. Quite weird when you look at it that way. That's always been my argument to dp when he's expressed it's not 'normal' for ds to still get in with us every night. Couldn't be more normal in my opinion!
I think dip will miss it too when he does stop (which could be another 6 years time by the sound of it...)

Ds1 about 18m, he'd started moving away from us and moved to cotbed really easily, though we did sit with him initially until asleep.
DT1 was placed in cot about 22m and would fall asleep independently and stay that way for 11hours on occasion - no stealth boast, she's had a bit of a molar-related regression.
DT2 (at 30m) has yet to spend a night alone. He'll usually fall asleep in cot with company but is in with us before midnight hair-twiddling and doing the starfish routine.

His solution was simply to go and sleep in with his big teenage brother instead! That is adorable!

We are still co-sleeping, though I feel like a beginner compared to you lot! DS is four, and one on the way - am so excited to have us all snuggling in the big bed together. Feels perfectly normal and natural for us.

We coslept until dd was 9 months. Then I put her in a cot as couldn't take it.

But we actually have a bed in the DCs room so if they need company, one of us will sleep in their room. They share and are 5&3. They've never slept in our beds beyond babyhood but we will stay with them in theirs.

(In their room not their beds - too small!)

All three were between 6 months and a year! DD needed it more than her brothers.
If a child is unwell or has nightmares they will join us and DH moves to the sofa bed, but it is rare.
The oldest child I know that doesn't yet do full nights in their own bed is 6 and is an only child.

My daughter never had the need or want to co-sleep but my son never left my husband's and my bed until he chose to voluntarily at 11.

2, she's only been in her own room for 5 months. I'd have kept her longer if it was up to me but she wanted a 'big girl bed' and once she had one, didn't get out of it! I miss my bed time cuddles. We have a super king size bed so if ever she wants to come in with us she can, and there's room for 4 when the new baby arrives.

Since DD1 had a big girl bed aged about 2. We didn't co sleep every night but she hated being put back in her cot and would never settle back in it if she woke at night, so we'd co sleep any night when she awoke mid way through and refused to go back to the cot. (Usually every other night, more or less).

Once she had a proper bed she could get in & out of herself it was much easier persuading her to go back into it! Rather than standing up screaming in the cot, if she gets upset at night she can come in to us and ask to be taken back to bed. So much easier!

I can't remember exactly, but I think dd moved out of our bed and into her own at around 7ish. Might have been 6. We were very laid back about it and neither DH nor I were really bothered either way, so it was entirely dd's choice as to when and whether she wanted to move. We ensured that she had a bed and a nice bedroom, and let her know that she could decide for herself.

When she first moved out, she would occasionally have nights when she wanted to come back into our bed, typically when she was especially tired or feeling a bit under the weather, but that wore off over time. She is 9 now, and hasn't slept in our bed for absolutely ages - she still sneaks in for cuddles on a weekend morning, though. :)

Reluctant co sleeper here. 2 year old comes through every night. 9 year old starts off with us but I boot him out when 2 year old arrives. 6 year old joins us too. 11 year old would like to come as well but I've just had to put my foot down.
I'm so tired I want my bed back. Doesn't bother DH hes a heavy sleeper. Those that promote go sleeping implying it will be over in 2-3 years need to come to my house.

Co sleeping not go sleeping ...

I'm still co sleeping with my 7 year old.

He can and will sleep in his own bed if I'm ill or occasionally just wanting my own space. But those times he shares a room with my DS1. If he was going to be on his own I don't think I'd want him in his own room. It's mad, I'm okay with my 10 year old sleeping alone (but he likes it) but my 7 year old seems too little yet.

Still co-sleeping with 4 year old twins, and can't see it stopping anytime soon... I doubt we'll ever get them out of our bed!

Apparently Jo Whiley (the DJ) has an absolutely vast bed, and although her four children span a couple of decades (From 4 to 20-odd I think?) and they all have their own beds, sometimes they all like to sleep together in the super-family-bed. Made me quite teary when I read that. So lovely! All nattering away and then dozing. Lovely.

I'm glad this thread is here. My 4 year old sleeps in our bed every night. He did get in his own bed briefly for a while but has now returned every evening.... His reason is "because I love to rub mummy's arm and I can't do that when I'm in bed on my own"
I also have my 9 month old in our bed.... We are trying each evening to get him into his sleepyhead...with the hope of progressing into his cot. But it's v hit and miss and he has reflux and huge separation anxiety issues too, which makes things even trickier.