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What are we doing wrong? Need fresh eyes on the matter!

9 replies

Needsweetstosurvive · 25/02/2015 20:04

So, on a good night my ds wakes 4 times, on a bad night it can be up to 8 times. He has 8 teeth, had them by 8 months so could be teething molars. He self settles at bed time with me sitting next to him. When he wakes sometimes I just have to tuck him in and he goes back to sleep, other times we need to pat his bum to get him to drop off again. As sometimes he is sitting up, sometimes standing but crying every time. He is in a cot in his own room and has been since 6 months old. He has two naps during day, one about 45 mins and the other about 1.5 hours. Always awake by 3pm for school run and in bed asleep between 7 - 7.20pm. After that will sometimes do 3hr stretch but most often wakes every 1.5 - 2 hours until getting up at 6.40am. Breastfed but doesn't get a feed in the night. All naps in cot and never sleeps in our bed. What are we doing wrong??

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Needsweetstosurvive · 25/02/2015 20:09

Oh and he eats 3 big meals a day with snacks and breast milk in between. Crawling and cruising since 8 months, trying to walk now. He has done two 7 hour stretches in his life, the last one being when he was 7 months. Never slept through yet. I thought. Ds 1 was a bad sleeper, he at least started improving by 9 months and STTN by 12 months without training, not sure this little one will be doing that any time soon! Separation anxiety maybe?

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ohisay · 25/02/2015 20:34

honestly I don't think you're doing anything 'wrong', quite the opposite! I wonder if it's something that's not quite right for him in him room? too light/dark/hot/cold? my two liked a heavy blanket (we have a wool one) the weight seemed to relax them, even now at 6 and 3 they prefer Heavier quilts to lightweight ones for a good night's sleep.

Tangoandcreditcards · 25/02/2015 20:47

I could have written your post (except one of us normally ends up in bed with him after 3am ish because we're too tired/bored/cold to settle him). So whatever you're doing wrong, I'm doing too.

*helpful

Needsweetstosurvive · 25/02/2015 20:48

We keep his room at a constant 17 degrees, if I do think he is chilly I pop an extra blanket on him. His room is quite dark but always has been, don't really want to introduce a nightlight, don't think they are necessary and would rather he got used to the dark. He does get quite windy so wondered if it was dietary but no other signs and is a very happy boy in the day generally

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Needsweetstosurvive · 25/02/2015 20:51

Lol tango, I do feel a bit annoyed that we don't actually have any particular bad habits but still have crappy sleep ?? I'm sick of trying to work out what the problem is. He doesn't even come into our bed so not waking expecting this.

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Muchtoomuchtodo · 25/02/2015 20:53

How old is he now?

Is he in his own room, or does he share with a sibling?

Needsweetstosurvive · 25/02/2015 20:56

He is 10 months, in his own room

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Muchtoomuchtodo · 25/02/2015 21:15

The technique that worked for us was gradual retreat.

Settle him down and stay patting his bum and shushing him for a few nights, then stand by the cot shushing, every couple of nights take a step back to do the shushing. Eventually you'll be able to walk out of the room shushing.

It's not an overnight solution but worked for both of our boys in similar situations.

Tangoandcreditcards · 25/02/2015 21:27

Oh. My DS is 13 mo nearly. Our only 'bad habit' is the co-sleeping, but we only started that at 11mo because the back-and-forth in the early hours got ridiculous.

So.... Um... Maybe don't do that?

*double helpful

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