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3yr old has stopped/resisted sleeping!

1 reply

oxymoron76 · 25/02/2015 13:21

I am having a lot of trouble in the sleep department with my 3yr old she just turned 3!

So let me set the scene she was a very good sleeper from 2 months in her own cot and sleeping through apart from the odd days but as she grew the sleeping habit was great she would tell me when it was bed time and we would go through the bed time routine and then I would sway good night close the door and she would sleep or play in her room until she was tired and fall asleep. Never came out of her room or really cried for help to sleep.

So in Aug we moved house and the renovation work began I was really worried about her settling but the first night she slept through and then so on. At Xmas I decided to get rid of her dummy as she was coming up to 3 and she had stopped using it through the night but over the last 3-4 months I noticed she would have it through the night so we did the whole post it to Santa and you get you present and that went very well we had a few nights of crying and asking for it but overall I think we are passed that. She was already in the bed part of the cot bed but because she moved around a lot we bought her a big bed as her room had the space and well she took to that quite well. Oh I forgot to mention in all that we began to see tha tantrum monster and they were epic tantrums I really dont know who she gets that from ;-)

So now my troubles begin .. early Jan she began to wake up crying hysterically completely inconsolable and these were not short bursts these could go on for hours the longest started before bedtime around 6pm (more tantrum) and lasted until 11.30pm that night and that was the birth of the exorcist/poltergeist child. Where has my happy and pretty good kids gone!

So we are now 6 wweks on and apart from the odd lucky night of a couple of cries but back to sleep it is almost every night of waking up screaming, aggression, mummy go mummy dont go I want to be a big girl I want to be a good girl!

So what has driven me to write this is last night I didnt sleep and I reached the end I think and as I have to get up at 5.30 and to get ready for work and she was still calling and crying at 5am .. all the lights went on and I said well now no one is sleeping and that was pretty much it!

So I know they have terrors and nightmares so I can understand that but we are past the things that were scaring her as I havent heard her mention that for a while so here are some of the things I have done;

  1. No TV for a month have just introduced it and she is not that interested
  2. No phones/tablets and again she seems to have adjusted without
  3. Re-established bed time routine
  4. Changed her room around as we thought that she wasnt liking the layout and she seems to like the new layout
  5. Talked through what scares her and now she laughs and blows away things that cause her fear

What has changed;

  1. 7 months ago moved house
  2. 7 months ago moved to new nursery
  3. Had a lot of renovation work done so lots of people around until Xmas
  4. Removed the Dummy
  5. She moved to a double bed
  6. She is complaining a lot of leg/foot pain but that is also now a way for her to keep in the room pressing her feet.
  7. Oh and most importantly she turned 3!

I honestly dont know what to do anymore and what things to try we have tried reward charts, changing her sleeping so she was with me a few nights just so I could get some rest and she could as it was all catching up with her.

I need other perspectives now as I cannot think clearly anymore so am finding myself having to step back a lot now.

OP posts:
FATEdestiny · 25/02/2015 13:44

Does she have a night light? As well as a plug in light, you can also get those bedside lights that can be picked up and turned into a torch (holding the light and being able to point into dark corners may help her).

This age is very common for suddenly becoming scared of the dark.

Also - reward rather than punish:

You can have one sticker for every hour you sleep in your bed. Make a sticker chart together. Choose stickers from the shop together. Go through the argos catalogue and pick out a cheap toy and a better toy (we tend to do £5 toy and £20 toy).

So I would make a sticker chart with room for 12 stickers per night, seven rows, one for each day. In the morning she gets to put her stickers on the chart and gets one chocolate button (or whatever) for every sticker (so every hour quiet in cot).

Celebrate how much she did sleep not how much she didn't sleep. "Yeah, you stayed quiet in your cot for 7 hours last night, well done!". Even though 7 hours sleep might have meant screaming until midnight.

Give her a giant colourful tick if she has at least 7 stickers each night. Then stick a cut-out from the argos catalogue for the cheap toy she can have if she gets 7 big ticks - 7 hours sleep every night for a week.

Next week, challenge her to need 10 stickers for the tick (or 12 if you think this is manageable). Same sticker chart. For 7 days worth of 10 hours a night she gets the bigger toy.

Make every morning about celebrating how much sleep she did have, not how much sleep she didn't have.

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