controlled crying need support

[girl84]

Hi all, my little lady is 14 month old and has never been a great sleeper. I went back to work in October and pretty much exhausted with getting up up to 15 times a night with her.

I tried pick up put down but she still continued to wake and wanted to be picked up. When I put her down she would cling to me!

She now has one sleep a day usually 13:30-2 which has reduced her waking to 6ish times.

I've resorted to cc as her not sleeping is dominating our life..sounds dramatic but other ppl who's babies don't sleep will know what I mean.

I've started it tonight with the support of my hubby and she fell asleep within mins
I left her a minute each time then reassured her. Has been awful letting her cry n both been sat on the landing in bits.

can anyone say if this worked and has anyone got any advice? I'm assuming we do the same in the night?

thanks. X

Meant within 30 mins

Cc worked with my firstborn but have found it distressing with my second, more gentle child. I recently had a sleep nanny come to help and she was wonderful. She explained to me the loud distressing "accelerator" cries were interspersed with him trying to soothe himself cries ( mmmm mmm mmm) she told me to listen for the cry that pierced my heart and to time two minutes from then. If I couldn't hear him try to soothe himself with the White noise cries ( mmmmm mmmm mmm) then to go in and reassure him. Next time I heard the cry that pierced my heart to try and wait four minutes before going in ( but not to go in if I heard that he was trying to soothe himself) it has been amazing - he cried for a few minutes when I put him down and leave the room and has totally learnt to self settle and what's more it has taken the stress out of listening to him cry because now I can hear the difference in his cries and know when he is soothing hswlf to sleep rather than thinking he is super distressed all the time. Anyway it was a revelation to me and thought it might help you- good luck!

Hey just a note on the PU/PD - according to net mums after 8 months your better off doing the comforting in the cot rather than picking up.
www.netmums.com/baby/sleep/pick-up-put-down-technique.

We did this last week but increased the interval by half a sec each time up to 3 mins (then back to 1 min). The first time took about 15 mins (younger child) but after that we only had to go in 1-2 times and it really improved the self settling. If he was making noises, but not crying, when the time out of the room was up we didn't go back in, but if he then started crying we would go straight in and keep going from there.

Hopefully next time will be much shorter and u won't have to do that 30 mins ever again (awful isn't it - even when u can hear from the crys that they are angry rather than upset its still really hard)

Fingers crossed for you

Just persevere.

Did CC with DS at 8 months as was due back at work. Due to reflux and bottle/milk refusal, he was an atrocious sleeper (3 hours without waking could be considered a 'good' night)

Anyway, tough love was in order as he simply isn't the type for softly softly approaches. Started with 2min, then 4, then 6.... On the first night it took 15-20m and multiple wakings (which I left for 5,7,9 etc on the basis that he was sleepy and probably wanted to go back to sleep)

It took about a week of gradually increasing the times but he would put himself to sleep (after rocking cuddles for about 5m) and, if he woke, would put himself back to sleep with his dummy.

It's still not perfect. He still wakes multiple times in the night, especially when he's not feeling great or teething, but it's MILES better than it was-probably down from 10+ wakings to 1-2 and these are because he can't find his dummy and he goes straight back to sleep once he's got it.

That's the next hurdle-going cold turkey with the dummy. Ugh

It is not dramatic if the sleep depravation is driving you insane.

I had to do the same when i got back to work and it was heartbreaking but the logic thing to do and now my dc is a very good sleeper :)

Good luck.

Thanks so much, makes you feel like a terrible parent.

She slept 7pm-5 then until 6:30! Tonight she has cried for about 20 seconds and has gone quiet.

It's good to hear success stories. .pleased for you and it gives me hope lol.

Thanks. Xx