Dummy advice

[ralv]

Hi All,

So far in 5 weeks of motherhood I have done so many things that my arrogant pre-parent self said I would never do.
My DS is extremely fussy, particularly in the evenings, and seemed to have a very strong desire to suck. So after a particilarly scream filled day and lots of to'ing and fro'ing with the decison, we bought a dummy.

Ideally I want to use it only to help him settle to sleep and not have it jammed in his mouth morning, noon and night.

So I would really love to hear how you used dummies. Would you leave it in at night or take it out just as he falls asleep? Would you use it if he was fussing when put down for a nap or just for full red faced scream attacks
Thanks so much in advance!

As an expert in hindsight (!) I try and be strict about restricting its use solely to bedtimes. When your DD/DS is in a deep sleep it will probably fall out without them waking and at that point I'd leave it out rather than trying to put it back in. Don't beat yourself up about using a dummy, it can provide great comfort and we all do what we have to do. X

Hi
I was exactly this same : totaly against dummy :-) Now my 15 weeks old Girl has dummy to go to sleep. I was really scared about giving it to her in case she becomes addicted to it and after reading people critisasing use of dummy. I have also done so much internet and book reading about it that i was going crazy !! we decided to go with our instinct which was to use it. Our little girl was only 2 months old (that when we started) she was to little to smooth herself to sleep without any help and it does say that dummy helps to prevent a cot death. Now she falls asleep on her own in her Moses basket and she can sleep in the night without it (when she looses dummy). As far as your baby doesn't wake up every time dummy falls out and doesn't have dummy while awake in the day I think its all right to use it.

With DC1, I introduced one at about 3m and took it away at 12m. With DC2, I used it sooner, and took it away at about the same time. I only ever used it for naps / bedtime unless it was truly desperate (illness etc). Taking it away was hard but helped that had only had at naptimes etc. I just did cold turkey when on holiday lots and a week later it was done

No regrets!

Introduced about 8 weeks and she had one until 2. Only ever for bed and naps. Never ever walked around with one. Literally just associated with sleep time

I have found with both of mine that the dummy falls out once they are in a deep sleep. I never replace unless they are stirring and not due a feed.
With dd we only used for naps and bed (as a sleep prop) with ds more so as he has silent refkux and often in pain, the sucking seems to help. I was also anti dummy and never thought I would use them but they have been a godsend. Hoping to wean dd off hers soon as she will be 2 next month.
I know a friend who only used for daytime naps (rather than night) and it seemed as though it was much easier to wean off as naps are eventually dropped with time. Maybe worth a thought?

Also have you considered if the night time fussiness may be colic or silent reflux? My ds suffered terribly with this. White noise, dummy, swaddling and eventually medication helped this.

Are you breast feeding op? May be your baby trying to get your milk supply up- I just fed fed fed in those early weeks, esp in the evenings. Do use a dummy if you want to though, it won't cause baby any harm. Especially If you only use it for sleep and not to quieten baby every time he cries.

I give DD dummy as a sleep prop, for naps only. I feed to sleep at night so god knows what's going to happen in the future. DD only 9wo.

I didn't plan to use a dummy but introduced it at about 6 weeks when I found that dd is very sucky and finds it very comforting. It's been a lifesaver for when she's overtired or over-stimulated, which has been happening a lot recently (she's now 13 weeks). When she's in that mood she will often reject the breast, even if she's hungry, and cry hysterically (I think the smell of milk drives her into a frenzy or something). Sucking the dummy helps her calm down, so that she can feed if she needs to, or go to sleep. At the moment she is really fighting sleep and can get very upset, and the dummy helps her cope with that transition. She only minds it falling out if she isn't quite asleep yet, in which case she cries (but she is already learning how to use her fists to keep it in). Once she is asleep she lets it fall, and she doesn't need it to re-settle after late night feeds, just to help her go down the first time, especially if it's been a while since she had a nap. And definitely for daytime naps, when she often won't settle even when she's desperately tired because the world is so interesting. When she isn't tired or stressed she shows little interest in the dummy and doesn't particularly want it in her mouth.