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Sleep

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Original poster

Newborn sleep help

23 replies

LittlePink · 01/02/2015 06:54

Ds is 18 days old and I can't get him to settle after night feeds. He feeds well and I burp him regularly but once he's stopped feeding i put him back in his Moses basket next to me and he just screams and screams sometimes for 2 hrs. Last night it was 1.5 hrs between 2.15-3.45 I've tried everything I can think of and even bringing him into bed with me doesn't help. Eventually he fell asleep sat up in the crook of my arm last night but I said to dh at one point when I was nearly in tears I don't know what's the matter with him, I feel so rubbish at this. I just can't settle him at all.

He goes to bed swaddled, we change his nappy before the feed as he's often wet through despite moving up a size nappy, I feed him, burp him, change nappy again as by then he's filled his nappy, tried the 5 s's which works like magic in the day but never at night, tried sleeping him on his chest, in swaddle, out of swaddle, rubbing tummy, rubbing back, rocking Moses and pat shushing. But for the 18th night now I can never get him to settle after the feed. He's quite a sicky boy and I asked hv about it but she just said its all newborn behaviour but what if he's in pain and no ones helping him because they say it's all normal. He's fine in the daytime. He sleeps almost constantly apart from 2-3 hr feeds and settles fine. It's just at night. Any ideas?

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Original poster

LittlePink · 01/02/2015 06:57

I forgot to say it's usually 2 night feeds and won't settle for 2 hours after each one so we're awake most of the night. Then our toddler gets up at 6.30am so it's pretty horrendous at the moment!

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Original poster

LittlePink · 01/02/2015 06:59

Sorry typo I don't sleep him on his chest- I meant my chest!

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Booboostoo · 01/02/2015 07:29

Sorry you are going through this, it sounds very, very tiring and stressful. Unfortunately I think it's one of these things that newborns do. Very often they are more unsettled during the night than the day, and nothing works.

Can you sleep at all during the day? Is there any chance of changing DC1's sleep habits to fit in more with the baby? Do you have any help during the day with DC1, nursery or CM, or can you get help with other stuff like a cleaner?

Hang in there, it will get better.

WhyNotSmile · 01/02/2015 07:34

He falls asleep in the crook of your arm, but not in his basket? Could it be that he doesn't want to lie flat for some reason (eg reflux?)? Could you try putting him to sleep in something more upright, like a car seat, and see whether that works? Obviously it's not a solution, but it would at least let you figure out whether sleeping upright helps, and you could go from there.

Original poster

LittlePink · 01/02/2015 07:38

Dd is 2.7 and sleeps really well. 7pm- 6.30am. She's starting pre school in a couple of weeks for 2 sessions a week so that should help. I don't have help in the daytime but dd still naps after lunch which I want to keep hold of as long as I can!! But every time I go to nap myself ds seems to know and wakes up! Either that or ive got a million and one things to do in the house like piles and piles of never ending washing!

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Original poster

LittlePink · 01/02/2015 07:43

I tried tilting his basket on a towel but found it made his snoring worse so took it away and all the loud noises settled down. He's fast asleep sat up in my arms now so I do think it's the lying flat on his back he hates but I worry having him in bed with me at night. I guess he sleeps so well in the day is because he's always asleep on me or propped up in the breastfeeding pillow next to me or in the sling etc.

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BananaPie · 01/02/2015 08:39

There are some good tips on this website: www.troublesometots.com/newborn-baby-sleep-survival-guide/

Swaddling and white noise worked well for us.

wigfieldrocks · 01/02/2015 09:10

Two night feeds at two weeks old is actually not a lot. Are you sure he's not actually still hungry? Especially as he only does this at night - babies are nocturnal and will feed more at night for the first few weeks.

eurochick · 01/02/2015 09:14

I also thought it could be hunger. Mine was definitely wanting more than two night feeds at that age.

wigfieldrocks · 01/02/2015 09:20

Sorry ignore me - I got confused reading the post, I see it's not 2 night feeds at all. Having just been through similar with my now 8 week old though I do sympathise - could be a combination of colic and a very hungry baby? Someone I know going through the same as you at the moment took her baby to a chiropractor and says it's worked wonders - maybe worth a try?

wigfieldrocks · 01/02/2015 09:25

Sorry total baby brain here! Was sure I read two night feeds somewhere and then saw the first post. Yes two night feeds is not very much for a newborn but I guess it's what determines a night feed - I would be expecting a baby that age to be feeding every 1.5-2 hours at night. The only way I could cope was to let him latch on while I was lying down then when he'd fed back to sleep dp gently lift him back into his crib on his side of the bed. They can be very unsettled if they are near you and can smell your milk. Sorry for all my confused posts - hope you are ok, sleep deprivation sucks

Original poster

LittlePink · 01/02/2015 09:46

It is every 2-3 hours Round the clock and feeds up to an hour at a time then is unsettled for another hour or 2. So I'd say 2-3 night feeds between 10 and 6 so he's doing what newborns do in terms of wanting feeds. It's just the re settling that's the problem. Sorry my brain is in a fog so not describing things very well!

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Original poster

LittlePink · 01/02/2015 10:14

Also forgot to say when I try to feed him again at night he doesn't seem to want it and shakes his head and cries.

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Original poster

LittlePink · 01/02/2015 10:19

Wig- I wonder if it could be an idea to try putting him on Dh's side and see if it makes any difference. In the haze of sleep deprivation sometimes you need someone else to just say have you tried x,y and z.

Thanks everyone else too. Gives me things to ponder on with the different ideas.

I have heard of cranial osteopathy wig, my friends baby had it and said it really helped. Will see how things go and keep it in mind.

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1stBabyQuestions · 01/02/2015 16:18

Have you tried putting him to sleep on his side?
I have a 9day old and she will only sleep on her side in our sleepyhead mattress, or on us! X

wigfieldrocks · 01/02/2015 19:08

Good luck, been through it all myself just recently but ds3 is now 8 weeks and web are starting to see a more settled baby now.

Booboostoo · 01/02/2015 19:57

Can you try to either drop chores that are not strictly speaking necessary or get some help so that you concentrate on surviving this period?

From what you say about lying flat I wonder if he might not like the cocoonababy. It's quite expensive and you never know if they will take to it, my DD loved it, my DS hates it, but it was worth the money just for my DD who would otherwise only sleep on me.

Original poster

LittlePink · 01/02/2015 20:24

He seems to like sleeping on his side but I wouldn't settle myself if I left him on his side at night. I have let him nap on his side under my supervision in the daytime and he looks so comfortable and sleeps for ages but no I couldn't do it at night although he probably would like that position more.

In terms of dropping chores, we create far too much washing not to keep on top of it. Especially with all ds's sicky bibs, baby grows and poo explosions! The rest of the house is a complete tip though!

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TarkaTheOtter · 01/02/2015 20:28

My dc2 was like this - hated being flat. It was brutal but he did grow out of it. For the first few months weeks he would only sleep upright on my chest. He then turned into a pretty good sleeper so I think it was just a digestive thing that he needed to grow out of.

mrsnoon · 01/02/2015 20:31

Mine slept much better slightly tilted on his side and if you pull his underneath arm out away from his body he wont be able to roll onto his front.

mrsmugoo · 01/02/2015 21:59

You're just feeding him and putting him back in his basket awake and expecting him to fall asleep by himself? At 18 days old?

Is this your first baby?

Babies pretty much need "putting" to sleep until several months old - have you tried rocking him to sleep after a feed and then putting him down when he's nicely asleep?

Genevieve1976 · 03/02/2015 19:31

Hi little pink

I feel for you, my 24 day old great during day, then nighttime either awful after feeding to settle or pretty good, he's feeding every 2/3 hrs too. Hardcore sleep wise and I'm being unhelpful with no solutions, I've got the book 'the wonder weeks' recently which is interesting and put my mind at rest a little. Hope ur little one improves soon, my other half works away two weeks in a row so it's like treading in concrete at mo!!!! Xxxxx

1stBabyQuestions · 04/02/2015 22:18

I understand your hesitation about sleeping on side, I know my little one wouldn't sleep on her back at all! (She is now 12days old) providing they can't roll onto their front surely they are ok!? As I said I use a sleepyhead mattress and I think she likes being cocooned, it also helps if she is a little windy too! You can buy those mats that have sensors in them for babies who like to sleep on their front and side. A friend of mine brought hers from John Lewis (not sure what they are actually called) but her DS will only sleep on his belly, they co-sleep, but brought this mat as an extra procaution. If baby stops breathing it rings an alarm.
I don't know if that would be worth trying if nothing else works?

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