PLEASE PLEASE HELP! 7 month old never sleeps!

[becs31]

I am at my total wits end, we have a 7month old DD. As a newborn she suffered v badly with reflux and colic and could not lie down, so DH and i took turns to sleep with her sitting up on us. She is still suffering with what appears to be chronic wind at night although she is fine in the day. At night she farts LOTS and the paedatrician has now give us Merbentyl (anyone tried it? so far it isn't working.) Anyway, DD will not sleep really at all and either screams or is very awake all night. We have tried EVERYTHING, cranial massage, almost every drug going, routines etc etc. I know a lot is also to do with the fact she hates being alone but i am at the end of the road emotionally, we have not slept for 7 months and it never gets better. The consultant and HV have given up on us know and i feel they think i am a crazy neurotic mum as she appears so well in the day. She sleeps around x2 25 min naps in the day. I have no idea how she keeps going as i am only just surviving. i feel like i am failing as a mum, we tried 6 years and IVF to get her and now i feel so sad. Can anyone help? Thankyou.

Hi
My youngest is now 17mths old and had and still has (but not as bad) eczema and he also suffered with colic in the beginning. He has slept downstairs with my husband since 2 mths old - on my hubbys chest! He would wake up all the time and we didnt want him waking up the 3 year old. Anyway one day we both said NO MORE - cant keep living like this! I bought an electronic book over the internet and what it basically said was to put baby in cot and let baby cry - first for 3 mins then go in, quick cuddle and put back then 4 mins etc. I have always said I would never let him cry but this one night I did - it lasted 20 mins in total and 10 the next night - but now he more often than not just goes straight off when put in cot. It also says need a good nap in the day - he is put in cot about 12-1 and usually sleeps until 3. Your little one probably needs am and pm nap as much younger. It is also important (it says in the book) to have a wind down time - smooth talking, read a book - say going to bed soon. Have you tried the Dr Brown bottles for the wind? They worked for us.

sleepclinic
HTH's

Hey Friz - how come you never suggested that to me?!

becs - can I just make sure I've understood you correctly - your DD has 2 naps during the day of 25 mins each, and little or no sleep all night?

How is she being fed - breast or bottle? Has your GP looked into the possibility of dairy intolerance with you?

Are you prepared to do controlled crying with her? I suspect so from the desperation in your post! If so, get yourself a copy of Richard Ferber's book, 'Solve Your Childs Sleep Problems'.

I also had a DD that wouldn't sleep, day or night (my usual posting name is CantSleepWontSleep), and was generally miserable, but we have finally got over this thanks to a combination of me giving up dairy (she's breastfed and milk intolerant), putting her on gaviscon (for silent reflux) and doing controlled crying.

Also, and I'm sure you will have considered this already, what kind of solids is she eating during the day?

hi thanks for your posts, it helps that there are people out there! Yes, M sleeps around 25 mins x2 a day. I totally agree that it is a good idea to try to extend the day naps, it is just that she is so hyper in the day, and night. We have a v small flat and cc is not really an option as the neighbours already hate us for the nouse for the past 7 months! however, my partents are on holiday in Oz for 6 weeks and we are considering moving in there for some sleep and to try to get M into some kind of routine. Do you think it is too late? i am so worried about everything! She is on solids, our day kind of goes like this ; brekkie, weetabix ( for bowels) with baby milk, boob feed after, lunch around three hours later; homemade puree and yoghurt, bottle feed after, tea around 4 hours later, ususally baby rice and fruit, boob feed 1 hour later, bed ( ha ha!) Boob generally calms M down when all else fails although i got v sick of it as sge wanted it consently and after 5 months she finally took the bottl which changed our lives as it meant DH could feed her when hge got in, THANK GOD!! So that us1 thankyou for replying to me xxx

p.s yes r.e dairy intolerance, our cranial therapist suggested it and i absatined for 2 weeks. sometimes i feel it is to do with the milk but she is ok in the day, she is a mystery!!

p.s yes r.e dairy intolerance, our cranial therapist suggested it and i absatined for 2 weeks. sometimes i feel it is to do with the milk but she is ok in the day, she is a mystery!!

Anyone there to answer a question about naps during the day?

It's never too late Becs! Since you have the opportunity to go to your parents for a while I would take it, and after a couple of days for her to get used to her new surroundings, begin cc. You should find it works within a week or so. You might find her a little unsettled again when you move home, but simply do the cc again for a day or so and you'll probably find she doesn't put up much resistance. If necessary warn the neighbours that there might be a couple of bad nights, but that you expect things to be much better afterwards, so if they can just bear with you then it will be in their own best interests too.

Doesn't sound like her food should be bothering her - I'd just wondered if she was having particularly windy stuff, but doesn't sound like it.

And of you finally getting her to take a bottle. My DD still won't. They are stubborn little mites with minds of their own aren't they?!

If my dd has a nap longer than 20 mins in the day its harder to get her to bed at night.why r naps important?

Have you written down when she sleeps how long etc. babies this age should sleep at least 12-15 hours a day. Have you looked at what kind of stimulation she gets? Babies also tend to do better with a decent routine, and I know this is going to sound anal, but I bend my life around Funky Dude?s routine as he can be a temperamental sleeper sometimes, I figure it is only for 2 years until day naps are no longer an issue, and then I can resume with my life. (It's not that bad, I get loads done in the day at home).

I think if this is a genuine problem and it appears you have asked professional help that you should ask for a referral to a sleep clinic.

I saw a story on TV today about a one year old girl that never slept and it was found out she had a type of sleep apnoea that was rectified by removing her tonsils and adenoids.

Vicky55 most babies under the age of 1 sleep up to 15 hours a day in order to function and help their brains develop. If sleep is a big problem and normal strategies do not work in getting baby to sleep then you should ask advice from your GP.

FunkyDude was very alert and awake in the early months, we ended up getting him to take 3 x 45 min naps in the day which pulled him through to bedtime. Thankfully he has never had a problem with sleeping at night. He is now nearly 11 months and I can get him to take 2 naps a day up to 3 hours in total, and I think the fact that he is very mobile now makes it easier to get him to take a rest.

M2FD - at story of 1 year old.

Just wanted to (nicely) contradict a little at your 'at least 12-15 hours a day'. The average at this age is around 14 hours (source Ferber), but obviously being an average it is made up of those that do more and those that do less. Although DD will have 12-13 hours some days, others she is quite happy with 11.

I'm lucky if I get 13 hours from FD, a friend of my sister had a similar problem and the GP just told her, "maybe he doesn't like to sleep during the day"...

Aren't GPs just great .

I know how you feel. I used to have to breastfeed my son (now 6 months) to sleep and then he'd only sleep for 20 minutes get up and be cranky and tired again 20 minutes later but refuse to sleep during the day -he was better at night though. Some babies just fight sleep all the way. He's much better now and the answer seems to be routine (he's a v active baby so I make sure I always do some wind down time on my lap with him, reading a book, before his nap time and his bed time), swaddling and putting bolsters around him in his cot (so he feels all cosy and cant move around too much) and sitting near the bed and shushing him for 5-10 minutes if he's getting tetchy about sleep (its amazing but eventually it seems to hypnotise him to sleep). Hope these tips help.

Naps? No idea why they are important, but they seem to be for ds.

We've been really struggling with sleep since he was a newborn (would only sleep on my chest or dh's chest for the first 3 weeks and has fought sleep ever since!).

Since starting the NCSS, which is very hot on naps, I have been taking him for an hour long walk in his pram every afternoon at the same time, and he goes to sleep. And he sleeps more at night. If I miss the pram-nap he is harder to settle and sleeps worse at night. If I do the pram-nap too late he is harder to settle and sleeps worse at night. It's a fine balance with some babies!

that was to Vicky55 by the way (sorry, forgot to say)