Does anyone lie with dc as they go to sleep?

[MamaMaiasaura]

Just interested if other parents do similar and whether they feel guilty as is not generally 'accepted' and we are encouraged to just leave them.

Ds (6) each night has a story, talk, snuggle and special song (skidder-marink), I then lie with him as he falls asleep - I generally lie there and plan the next day in my head and even snooze.

I know that he can sleep without all this but he loves it and I do too. I also rationalise that it will become 'less cool' as he gets older as they are kids for such a short time and he is so wonderfully affetionate and loving. We have a very special bond (sure we all feel that way about our kids).

HE is asleep by 7.30 - 8 most nights and doesnt need night light, sleeps in own bed etc.

Does anyone here do/did a similar thing?

Well we have progressed from sitting with DS (5) till he went asleep to him now not even attempting to sleep in his own bed! He sleeps with one of us. It's nice in some ways and a nightmare in others.

He tells me that he will sleep with me/DH till he is 6. Then when he is 7 will sleep with us again. Will sleep alone at 8. Back with us at 9. He says that my 10 he will be sleeping on his own all the time. Has it all worked out!

I (or my dh) lay with my ds till he went to sleep until he was 25m I still occasionally bf'd him to sleep until he was 22m but as I was pg I broke his bed once so just stayed in room next to him after that - we co-slept until he was 19m then he went to his own room. We decided to use rapid return to teach him to fall asleep on his own after dd was born as he was waking frequently and would not go to sleep unless we stayed with him - this made life difficult for everyone esp with new baby. He now falls asleep (after we leave the room) v happily with his soft toys and we make sure he has nice stories cuddles etc. in lead up - I love co-sleeping with dd and as long as I am bf'ing then she will stay with us but when she is ready I look forward to her learning to sleep alone too.

Staying with them is fine as long as it doesn't cause problems for the childs sleep - and with older children I imagine it won't - you have to do what feels right.

should say I stayed next to him in his room - until we started to use the rr thing...

Awen, it sounds lovely, and I partly envy you. If we tried that ds would just talk and talk and talk ....

How do you manage if you want to go out? Will he do the same thing with a baby-sitter, or manage without the routine for one evening?

I'd be afraid ds wouldn't ever go to bed without me if I got into that sort of routine.

I do this with both mine Awen. I hop in with them & we have a brief chat & cuddle and usually stay until they start to drift off. Mine both sleep in their own bed & they don't "need" me to get off to sleep, as if I'm out or they are at their Dad's they still go to sleep fine.
I think it is lovely. It is often the nicest bit of my day.

I do this with ds (7.5 months). It's one step further on than cuddling and breastfeeding him to sleep - I lie down beside him and talk gently and stroke his back until he is fast asleep. I really like it.

Right back here now. There is some really interesting replys.

I know ds can get to sleep without the whole cuddling up as he does os at his dads and also does so here if I am going out. This coming weekend his cousin is coming ot stay so I will snuggle up and read them both stories, do the song (my sisters sing their kids similar songs) and leave them to it.. will probably end up on here requesting help in how to get them to stop chatting and sleep!

I am a bit worried that I will end up breaking his bed as we are hoping to have a baby and heaving myself up the ladder could be interesting.. bed already creaks . Altho this probably wont happen for at least a year.

Budabeast - they do work it out dont they .. I love kid logic

Sliderrule - whats the rr thing?

Bikebug - thats how i started with ds, it is lovely isnt it? I remember the sighs he made as a little baby when drifting off

Bugsy yay, I am not alone

clumsymum - bless

dd falls asleep on my knee when we are reading stories then i put her in her bed where she stays all night unless she is ill and she ends up in with me she is nearly 3

she only does this with me if at her grandparents, childminder or if babysitter looking after her then she goes up to bed and goes to sleep on her own

i enjoy our bedtime cuddle and dont see it as a problem

sorry rr is rapid return - I was in a hurry - we used rapid return to teach ds to go to sleep - and it involves doing whole bedtime routine then saying goodnight and leaving the room while ds was awake - then returning him to bed without chat or eye contact (after the first two returns) until ds gave up and went to sleep - it was a couple of painful weeks as ds was fighting it to start - but we remained consistent (and outwardly calm - inside I felt horrible) then finally ds understood and started to go to sleep alone happily and now he sleeps much better and goes to sleep each night around 7.30pm then bounces into our room at 6am very happy (and so are we). I am in no hurry to introduce 6m dd to her own bed/ room but when she is a toddler I imagine we will use the same method when it feels appropriate.

I am sliderule btw

If I could I would stay with each of mine as they fell asleep, but as they all do it at the same time it's impossible! I hope that as they get older I will get more special time with each of them. Dd1 gets some as she gets half hour to read, and ds gets loads as he is a baby. Dd2 gets her time in the day, until recently she needed someone with her to sleep but would fight and fight. Reluctantly we did rapid return and she now snuggles in her bed, she sleeps well (which she needs for her health) and I am strict about only sleeping with her when she is unwell. I co-slept with both dds as babies and loved it, but ds seems happier in his cot - we did co-sleep when he had a cold but he's doing much better now he's back in his own bed.