Will I ever sleep again...?

7 replies

Snapdrag0n · 05/01/2015 15:20

I am living in a sleep deprived haze of madness having read numerous articles on 'how to get baby to sleep through the night' I no longer know what I should be doing, whether I should be doing anything and ultimately am consumed by the fear that I have done something wrong.

DS is 7 mths and used to sleep through the night until he turned 4 mths. The opinion seems to be that he has to be taught to 'self settle' and that is the root of the prob but he can (when he chooses), which he rarely does anymore! I bf when he wakes now as it is the easiest option but according to many articles this is an unnecessary bad habit at his age Should I stop, I want to believe he will learn to sleep again but am I being optimistic?

I don't want to believe that cc is the only answer but need to know there really is a light at the end of the sleep deprived tunnel!

OP posts:

Banana82 · 05/01/2015 15:57

Hi Snap

I have a 7.5 month old who now (only the last month) sleeps through the night. I don't believe in controlled crying. If he is crying it's for a reason but I know that's a personal choice.

He often wakes up and starts quietly crying. I go into him and just rub his belly or his head and he will quickly settle again. Someone's I leave him a bit longer to see if he settls himself and it descends into a screaming session.

I also stopped feeding at night. It was the easiest way to settle him but I wanted him to get out the routine of waking = milk. We had a couple of nights where it seemed to take ages for him to settle without the milk but so glad I did it. How many times a night does your DS wake? If he is getting enough milk in the day he doesn't need it at night. Maybe it's become a habit for him?

Lindalove · 05/01/2015 16:52

I don't have a baby (yet, am pregnant) but some books suggest when babies wake at night they might not be hungry, just in need of comfort. So perhaps you feeding is giving him this but could be replaced by something else faster... and easier on you. Does he lose interest in the feed quickly?
If he does how about a dummy to suck on, or one of these or something like it? www.amazon.co.uk/Sweet-Dreamers-Ltd-EWAN01-Dream/dp/B0040JSN7Y

Original poster

Snapdrag0n · 05/01/2015 16:57

Thanks for your reply Banana82,it's my first post on mumsnet after lurking for months so I'm pleased to have such a nice response already! I don't believe in cc either and it panicked me when I read that it's the "only" way to get a baby who wakes often to sleep through the night. DS will wake 4ish times a night and I agree it probably has just become habit for him, he eats three meals a day and bfs also, although I do find that his bfs are much longer in the night and more snacking in the day but then that's probably because he fills up at night I would love to sleep for longer than two hours in a row and I think that night weaning is probably the answer but I just fear hours of crying as I try to settle him differently and then even less sleep....I feel hopeful that you've done it and it's worked though!I have just kindof spent the last couple of months living in hope that he will just stop waking and "grow out of it" but maybe that's a tad optimistic! At what times of night did you say you weren't going to feed?Ive read to pick a 7 hour period (11pm to 6am) or no feeds from midnight, how did you work it?

OP posts:

OohNoo · 05/01/2015 18:42

Snapdragon, think I'm in a similar situation to you with my 8mo (just posted similar)... Was also just hoping baby will 'grow out of it', scared of not feeding him back to sleep cos I can't bear the thought of hours of crying and less sleep even if just for a few nights...
Anyway, that's no use to you! Just wanted to let you know you're not alone! And interested to hear any more advice that comes this way...

Original poster

Snapdrag0n · 05/01/2015 19:25

It's nice to know I'm not alone OohNoo, it's tricky isn't it...I plan to stop feeding in the night most nights but then when it comes to it, I look at the clock and it's 3am and I have the choice of an hour or potentially more of trying to settle DS to get a couple of hours sleep before he wakes again or a quick bf and back to sleep for more hours...the bf always seems to win as I don't have the energy, and not because I actually thinks it its necessary or even really the right thing to be doing for him anymore...ohhhh, maybe I'll try settling him without milk tonight

OP posts:

Joesmummy1 · 06/01/2015 07:22

We used a sleep consultant Sian Thomas at www.sleepbabies.co.uk look at her website lots of stuff there an case study about how to wean off the milk.
She advised us to wean off milk slowly,did itt over ten days, slowly reducing the minutes I was feeding and putting him down awake in the coy and then soothing. He protested the first few days but I never left him just sat beside him and comforted him. He slept through after I stopped the milk. If you can afford her, use her if not have a look at website as free advice there. Good Luck

Banana82 · 06/01/2015 08:01

I knew he was getting enough milk in the day Snap so I was sure that when he was walking it wasn't from hunger. This may be different to your little one as you say that he feeds longer at night and snacks in the day? Occasionally now he will wake and cry for a long time which I will then give him milk. This lasts for about 2/3 nights. (One/two feeds) then back to sleeping through. I read this can happen from developmental/growth spurts.

I agree with joesmummy. I just started to offer him enough to settle back down then he was back in his cot asleep. Never be a full feed. I do that now if he doesn't settle, but that's rare.

It's so hard not getting more than 2 hours sleep at a time and very much an easy way to get them back to sleep but I'm so so glad I had the rough couple of nights as he's now a 7pm-7am sleeper.

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