Baby Whispered advice - E. A. S. Y. relevant to using a sling?

[Lindalove]

Hi I'm 6 months pregnant and due with my first baby in April. I've been reading the Secrets of a Baby Whisperer book and generally think it sounds pretty good/ the advice is useful (will have to see when baby comes along of course as know no book. advice is ever totally right or relevant and you need to see what works for you and baby).

The EASY routine suggested - feed baby, play with baby, put baby to sleep and then have a bit of time for yourself - also sounds sensible in theory but I am wondering, is it possible to 'train' a baby to sleep using EASY both in a moses basket (where he will mainly sleep for the first 4-6 months) AND in a sling without teaching them habits like they have to be held close to you to sleep? As really want to encourage self-settling as much as possible which is why I like the Baby Whisperer approach which advises against babies being held until they fall asleep as you otherwise can create a rod for your own back/ have to always hold your baby for them to sleep even when they weigh a lot....

Is the 'solution' to try and 'train' him to sleep in his moses basket to start with so he can do that, before I use sling on him in any way? But if I don't use a sling sooner rather than later he may never get used to one?

I'd like to also have him sleep in a sling as it seems like you might then be able to go to the loo/ have two hands free and be able to go out & about more easily. I'd rather use a sling than a pram early on to get out of the house.

I know this probably also seems totally hilarious that I am trying to plan this (FTM) but I find it helpful to have thought a few things through, and be prepared to be flexible, rather than not have any plans at all!

I'm also confused as to how you get a baby to sleep in a pram as well, but I suppose that is at least similar to a moses basket, whereas a sling seems like quite a different thing to a small baby (sleeping upright rather than lying down?)

Any thoughts welcome!

With DS1 I just fed him to sleep as a baby, which was fine and very convenient, and I just stopped feeding to sleep (at bedtime, often still fed to sleep for naps as so convenient) at about 6 months. From the beginning I just got him to sleep various different ways - fed to sleep and lay with him in bed, put him in the sling/pram with a dummy and walked him to sleep - whatever worked best at the time. Didn't really put him in a cot to sleep until 5-6 months though.

With DS2 I got in the habit right from the beginning of always feeding him when he woke up, so a bit more of a EASY approach. Then he napped in a swing with a dummy at home or in a sling or pram if going out. When he woke I fed him. He never did a 3 hour cycle though, it was more like E 7-7.45am A 7.45am-8.15am S (in swing/sling) 8.15am-9am.

The baby whisperer is crap. Tiny babies don't tend to self settle and won't for a few months. Holding them to comfort them to sleep is a good thing when they are little and is not a rod for your Own back.
Dd was held or rocked when tiny and fed to sleep when a bit older and she learnt to self settle at 9 months.
The vibrations of a pram on pavement tends to send them to sleep, same as the car will get them to sleep when they're tiny.
I've got a sling for dd and I don't think she'd sleep in it now but she slept in it when younger and being cuddled close to me was a good thing. Certainly not a rod or any sort.
Try not to get caught up with what one particular parenting guru says, babies don't normally read books so you'll have to make up your own rules to suit you and your baby. Good luck :-)

You can't really 'train' them or teach them anything until they are 2 or 3 months old, they just don't have the brain structures in place. Those early months are when a sling can be really useful so maybe you can use the sling then and start the other approach later.
Also a sling is great and yes you can get stuff done, but you've still got a hot, heavy lump attached to you. When around the house I would plan to use a sling when needed rather than routinely. I use ours in the house when DD is clingy but more to save my arms, be able to make a cup of tea, eat a sandwich or put washing on, not do the hoovering etc. Chances are your baby will sleep in the Moses basket some of the time, so you will be able to get some stuff done.

it is great when out and about though :-)

The Baby whisperer drove me mad I'll be honest. The EASY cycle sounds simple enough now but If you're anything like me then your exhausted hormone addled brain will forget what comes next every time! I actually put the book in the bin in the end. I couldn't in good conscience give it to a charity shop or a friend in case someone else accidentally tortured themselves with the generally silly suggestions in there.
Newborns can't be trained but I'm sure even the Baby Whisperer acknowledges this (somewhere).
I am 100% in favour of slings from day one. The stretchy fabric kind that hold the baby very close (hearing your heartbeat) and upright. Most definitely not the Baby Bjorn type before they can hold their head up to breathe.
My 2 slept in lots of different places but never a Moses basket despite my best efforts. You don't need to worry about you will get them to sleep in a pram - for most babies it is the easiest way to get them off. In fact my second spent at least 3 weeks sleeping in the buggy all night by the side of my bed as I could use my foot to rock it when she stirred. Exhausting. Good luck!

Thanks - will try and use the sling then early on as a winddown/ have the baby in it to sleep on occasion.
I think I will relax about EASY and go with the flow for the first few weeks, but I do think implementing some form of routine (adapted for you & your baby) makes sense. I don't intend to treat EASY as a 'bible' or anything, just seems less harsh than some styles of parenting and also less 'whatever' than the unstructured types.
I am just hoping I don't get a baby who won't sleep for more than 20 minutes at a time as suspect I will be dead or dying by 6 weeks in that case. At least with newborns 'activity' can just be 5 minutes of showing them something black & white and singing a song... :)

I found easy didn't work at all with dd to the point where I am fairly convinced it is a coincidence when eat/sleep cycles are in sync. With ds it might have worked better as he napped better and fed more frequently.

If you have a contented baby, easy will work but you won't actually need it. If you have a difficult baby you will just be grateful for them to be asleep and won't care about sleep associations so long as they actually sleep.
Newborns just eat and sleep in my experience and don't need any activity at all.

I agree that newborns tend to just eat and sleep, with a nappy change for activity! It's when they get a little older that a routine will emerge. Neither of mine have napped in a basket or pram, only in sling or on us but it does change when they're older.

I had lots of good intentions and ideas before having my DD 6 weeks ago, boy have I had a shock!! I previously prided myself on being organised and having routines, babies do not appreciate this at all!!! I find I've ended up doing whatever keeps DD happy and me sane.

I hated baby whisperer so much I recycled it rather than give it to charity (and, if you want to bf, her advice on that is utterly appalling).

a newborn doesn't want to look at a black and white picture either.

Try to remember that you are giving birth to a tiny person, not a generic baby. He/she will have a tiny personality and preferences from day one. The sooner you accept that, the less stressful parenting will be. If you have a baby who likes a routine, you'll have to follow one. If you don't, it'll be hell.

FWIW, all three of mine have developed their own routines post 6 months. Once they are having meals, other things fall around htem.

I've actually found EASY really useful, it was a good balance between a more rigid Gina Ford style routine and completely going with the flow. I wanted some shape to my day, everyone is different though and it's important to remember that what works one day doesn't necessarily work the next - they'll keep you on your toes! The 3 hour cycle only really worked from when DS was 7 weeks.

Morning - I think the thing is that you probably had a baby who 'wanted' a routine. And it's flexible enough to find what suits them. I gree that, if you get a routine baby, it's more flexible than GF or whatever.

Absolutely, luckily he's a greedy sod like me who wants to know exactly when the next meal is coming I should have answered the OP... I think a sling would work perfectly well, I've taken everything with a pinch of salt and DS naps in his swing chair/pram/crib/or on me as suits us at the time. It's the order of things that I've paid attention too. Good luck & enjoy your little one

I used EASY loosely although agree when they are tiny it's more like EAES!

We used a sling as were on school runs and my little one liked being close to me. Now he's goes to sleep in buggy instead (he's 6 months).