From feeding to sleep to self settling.

[Writerwannabe83]

My DS is 8 months old and I feel embarrassed to admit that he is fed to sleep for every nap and I let him nap in my arms. He has never napped in his cot. I have tried a few times but he just cries and cries and because I'm so desperate for him to sleep I give in to the tears and let him feed and then sleep in my arms.

However, yesterday I confirmed my return to work date as being only 8 weeks away and when I go back to work things will be a lot different for DS (not really relevant to post though).

Anyway - because of this I absolutely know that I have GOT to stop feeding him to sleep and instead be able to put him down in his cot and for him to settle off on his own.

His first nap today was on me and lasted 25 minutes - very poor.

For his second nap I let him feed to sleep (as I was do desperate to get a nap out of him) but he woke up after 25 minutes. He was still clearly very, very tired so I put him in his cot to see if he'd settle back off but he had a complete meltdown. I waited 5-10 minutes to see if he'd settle but he was getting so distressed and frantic that I gave up and bought him downstairs. He was obviously still tired.

I bought him down at about 2pm and I'm thinking that seeing as 1.5 hours have passed I might go and put him back in his cot and see if he sleeps. He looks so tired

How long should I leave him in his cot before accepting a nap is not going to happen? I can't just leave him there for ages otherwise bedtime will come round.

I'm determined to sort out all the issues I have with DS's sleep because I've allowed him to get into some very bad habits

writer I decided to make the leap last night and put DD in her cot, in her room. She took an hour to settle but with not much crying, just mithering. She finally slept from 9-11pm, and 11-3 in her cot, then came into bed with us from 3-8am.
She is also proper full of cold. I hope we have turned a corner, but am not counting my chickens yet. Thanks for your kind words. It is very good to know I am not alone in these feelings.

Great news - I'm sure you will have good nights and bad nights whilst doing this but stick to your guns.

Not that I should be giving advice as I'm still giving in to DS. Last night was horrendous again. I really don't know what's got into him to make him deteriorate so much.

Welfare check OP......how is it going?

Just seen your other post!

Good luck with the cc.

Hi writer,

I feel your pain as my 9.5 month old isn't a great sleeper. I have tried gradual retreat and made some progress, but since then, there has been setback after setback (colds, teething, sleep regression etc). It's hard not to feel miserable and despondent at times .

I kind of skimmed over this thread, and have seen your other thread about CC, so know that you have a plan in place.

Don't know if anyone else, or possibly your sleep consultant mentioned this, but if I read your routine correctly, there is almost 6 hours between waking from morning nap to trying to put him down for an afternoon nap. Is that right?

If so, I wonder if maybe he's been awake too long...?

Again, apologies if someone else might have addressed this already. Just from experience I know if I miss the "window" with my little girl, she has a cruddier nap than a well timed one.

All the best with your slept training. Hope it's easy on you both

You sound like me before I went back to work with ds (my first) - he even napped on me.

I worked myself up into a state thinking he wouldnt ever self settle or nap without a bf.

Actually it was fine - without using cc, we got him napping in his cot (still feeding to sleep). We had a nanny who looked after him while I was at work - he went down for naps for her with no bother at all! Just wanted me to feed him and she would give him a cuddle (as DH would as I got him to start putting ds down for naps more).