I really do. I've had enough. Except I know I'll have to do it again in a few hours. And again, and again ad infinitum.
My 18mo DD has always cried at bedtime. Every night without fail. Until she was 12mo she was bf to sleep, and there would always be tears at the end of the bedtime routine. She's always been a rough sleeper too - up frequently, taking at least an hour to resettle. Doesn't self settle.
Had weaned off the night bf, got rid of the association by doing some gentle sleep training (mixture of pupd and cc, but only up to max 5 mins crying and we never needed to do that). It worked for a month. Now we're back to epic meltdowns before naps and nighttime sleeps every night. She fights us if we have her in our arms and I'm not strong enough to restrain her. If we put her in her cot she screams and stands up and will continue screaming. Picking her up doesn't stop the screaming.
We've been trying a form of gradual retreat which works some nights but not others. It's exhausting. I can't take any more of this bloodcurdling screaming. We're also up for hours overnight with her, and she wakes at the slightest noise. Had (childless) guests staying over the weekend and we begged them to be careful with the stairgates etc but they kept 'forgetting' and letting them slam shut which woke DD and meant we then spent the next couple of hours resettling her again.
What do I do?? I was walking the streets with her for 2 hours at 2.30am last night cos I couldn't bear to be inside with the screaming.