Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

Flip

Original poster

How long it "too long" to keep DD in our room?

18 replies

Hedgehogging · 20/10/2014 16:27

Just canvassing for opinions.

DD is 6 months and sleeps in her cot in our room. Initially DP and I figured we'd do this till she hit 6 months but now neither of us wants her to leave! (Especially DP which is somewhat sweetly unexpected.)

My question is, to those of you who kept your DCs in the room with you for longer periods, is there a point at which it becomes really difficult to move them into their own? I think I'd like to keep her with us till she's 1 maybe?? Thoughts appreciated!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Original poster

Hedgehogging · 20/10/2014 16:28

Damn, typo! How long too long.

OP posts:

HavanaSlife · 20/10/2014 16:34

All mine have been in with me until at least 1, ds3 was in with us until 18 momths then moved into his own room with no problems.

Ds4 is still in with us now at 20 months

PetraStrorm · 20/10/2014 16:39

I think it depends so much on your DD's temperament and what you want to do. My DS was in his own room from about 8-9 months (I was keen for this to happen) but he took every possible opportunity to come back into our room!

Dd was entirely different. I was newly single when she was born and co-slept with her from birth. I wasn't at all worried about which room she slept in, but she was a great sleeper and I only had myself to think about (DS was way past the broken-nights stage when DD arrived) She gradually moved to a sidecar cot, a cot next to me with the side up, a cot in the corner of my room, until we moved house just after she turned 2 and she went straight into her own room. She was absolutely fine and still prefers her bed to any other.

I think in part this is due to her more independent temperament and also because I was utterly unstressed about where she slept, so she didn't pick up any tension.

In a nutshell, just do what works for you and your DD and don't worry about other people's opinions. Keep her in your room as long as you feel happy doing it. 6 months is still quite tiny.

fishnettights · 20/10/2014 19:36

Just moved dd out easily at 21 months. I miss her.

Molotov · 20/10/2014 19:41

We moved dd1 at bang-on 6m and I HATED it.

We moved dd2 at 9m as we couldn't fit her cot into our room.

TBH, I think up to 18m or so is fine (that would be my personal 'limit')

Original poster

Hedgehogging · 20/10/2014 19:56

Thanks all! Good to know there are others out there who have had longer term little roomies and with no major issues getting them moved out when the time was right.

Fishnet, TBH I'd say it wouldn't knock a feather out of DD, but I would miss her terribly!

Looks like another few years months of manoeuvring around a giant cot in a small room

OP posts:

HavanaSlife · 20/10/2014 23:03

For us it was a case of where to put them as well, we moved to a 3 bed house when ds2 was 15 months so thats when he went into his own room (8 years between ds1 & 2)

Also 8 years between ds2 &3 we moved to a 4 bed house when he was 18 months. 22 monyhs between ds3&4, ds4 will go in with ds3 when I feel they are ok to share

MsBug · 20/10/2014 23:11

Dd slept in our room till she was about nine or ten months. We visited some friends who had two small spare rooms so we wouldn't all fit in one room. Dd slept much better than she ever had done in our room so when we got home we moved her into her own room for good.

I really missed her! But it was worth it for the extra sleep. Now she's nearly two and I love it when we go on holidays and share a room again, listening to her breathing when I go to bed. Enjoy it while it lasts.

Pico2 · 20/10/2014 23:19

Even if they go in their own room, plenty of children come into bed with their parents at some point in the night for ages. DD is 4 and sometimes comes in at 2.30am, though often sleeps through to 7am in her room. When I mention this to other parents, a surprisingly high proportion seem relieved as they thought that their child was the only one.

Original poster

Hedgehogging · 21/10/2014 08:30

This is a very reassuring thread! Thank you for all your comments.

Havana it's sort of similar for us in that we do have a second bedroom but it's currently used for drying clothes and storing suitcases and a particularly ugly sofa belonging to landlord. So I'd feel sort of bad consigning DD to it

OP posts:

HappyAsaSandboy · 21/10/2014 09:04

We moved our twins out at just over three years old! They moved with no issues, though they join us for cuddles sometime in the night (which is fine by me).

Do whatever you think best for your family and let the future work itself out :) Things could pan out well or badly whatever you do now, so go with what makes you happy :)

TinyTear · 21/10/2014 09:06

14 months in my case... i think around 11 to 18 is ok...

just dont move when they are poorly/teething

FishWithABicycle · 21/10/2014 09:08

We planned to have DC1 in our room till 6 months. The plan was that during the first few months of maternity leave I would get the (1 bedroomed) house into a saleable condition and get it on the market, and we'd move into a 2- or 3- bedroomed place at circa 6 months. (hollow laugh)

We moved at 2 years old and had a cot in our room throughout those first 2 years. It wasn't a massive problem but it was lovely to have a grownup space back when we finally did move.

You go with whatever feels right for your family, there aren't really any rights or wrongs. Millions of children all over the world don't have the luxury of a bedroom separate from their parents, it's not a big deal.

Figster · 21/10/2014 09:12

Blimey I'm pretty much the opposite of everyone else then as Our ds went in his own room at around 3 months would have preferred him staying closer to the 6 but we were all waking each other up every night so dh insisted. Hes never slept in our bed apart from maybe an hour in morning if he comes in with us and we'd fall asleep but that was very unusual.

He has slept for 12hrs right through for a long time though so we've not had to deal with night wakings and his stair gate is on his door as it can't go at the top of the stairs so he doesn't invade over night.

YellowSpoon · 21/10/2014 09:16

Mine stay until they tell me they want to go:) usually 3 ish... Sometimes bit earlier.

MsBug · 21/10/2014 19:34

I've just noticed your original question is how long is too long to keep them in your room... I'd say when they start to bring boy / girlfriends home, they probably need their own room

Original poster

Hedgehogging · 22/10/2014 12:39

MsBug

OP posts:

strawberryshoes · 22/10/2014 12:49

DD1 was in with us until she went into a proper bed of her own (a double no less!) at about 2 years old. I suggested it to her at that point and she was keen. Previously she was sleeping in a drop sided cot attached to our double (or more often than not, actually in our bed snuggled up to one or the other of us) and it worked out nicely because she was never a good sleeper and being in with us, everyone got more sleep. Then when I felt she was ready, she moved with no fuss at all and if she was ever ill (rare with her, has the constitution of an ox) there was room for me to get into her bed to settle her because it is a double.

DD2 is now in the bedside cot and I can see her moving into her own room a bit sooner than 2 as she seems to like her own space more but at 7 months I am still doing one night feed per night and there is no way I am getting out of bed to do it! She will also have a double to go into so we can do the same thing again.

Flip

Swipe left for the next trending thread