Please help - problems with 16 month old's daytime nap

[Beaver80]

I would really appreciate any shared experiences or advice you have to offer, I'm just not sure what to do or what I'm doing wrong.

My 16 month old girl is a good sleeper at night and will settle herself back to sleep if she wakes during the night. Up to now she's been a pretty good daytime napper with two naps a day, in her cot if we're at home. I would put her in her cot and sometimes she would just quietly taker her comforter and go to sleep after I'd left the room. Sometimes she'd cry for a few secs then go to sleep. Occasionally she would cry for a bit longer and I'd go back in and rub her back a bit until she fell to sleep.

She still sleeps well at night (I always put her into her cot awake and she goes to sleep almost always without any complaint). But 3 weeks ago she started really resisting her daytime nap in her cot (she'll still fall asleep easily in the car or buggy). She has migrated from one nap to two at nursery so I have tried the same at home, waiting until after lunch and I know she's really tired. Also I should add that she goes to sleep fine at nursery, or so they say.

When I take her up for her nap I give her all the usual cues she has always had - shutting blinds, getting her comforter, attempting to wrap her in her blanket if it's cold enough, telling her it's time for a snooze etc. But now she just stands up and screams. I try to lie her down to do shush pat but she just screams harder and tries to sit/stand and wants to be picked up. I have tried repeatedly trying to get her to lie down but she just gets worked up. I've tried controlled crying (I had done that once successfully with my son when he was being tricky about age 2) but she got as worked up as I'd ever seen her and I had to stop. I couldn't even stop her crying for a second so I could leave the room again.

I'm just not sure what else I can do. I know I shouldn't bring her out of her room, and I'm trying not to rock her but even when I'm desperate and try to rock her she just arches her back and resists me even cuddling her.

She's teething but has been teething for months.

Sorry for the long post. I'm feeling like a bit of a failure at the moment. If anyone has been through anything similar I'd love to hear from you. Thank you.

Don't feel like a failure. Sometimes they have little sleep regressions that soon pass.

I'm not quite sure from your post whether your daughter has two naps now or one? I would have thought that it would be one by now. If so, and she's struggling to go to sleep after lunch, could you try putting her down before lunch, say at 11:30am, having had a small snack before/split lunch? This may ease the transition from 2 to 1 nap, so she's not overtired at all. As her awake take lengthens this will gradual move until after lunch.

Also, ime, thay have -yet another-- dose of separation anxiety at around this age.

I seem to remember having a difficult phase when DD dropped from two naps to one as there was a bit of a conflict over lunch and nap. Sometimes if you leave the nap until after their normal lunch, they are overtired (which your DD sounds a bit) but if you try and put them down earlier, they are too hungry to sleep properly.

I think we ended up with essentially two lunches for a month or two while it all settled down! Could you try that for a little while?

Thank you, those are good ideas and I'll try them the next day she is at home from nursery again.

To clarify, she was having two naps until recently but now is fine on one. But yes I think she gets overtired after lunch, and she's clingy at the mo, and been teething. All factors contributing to this regression.

Thank again for reading.