Won't sleep without boob - I'm at my wits end!

[sweetkitty]

Sorry another thread about my 8 month old DD2, DD1 was and is a great sleeper so this is all new to me.

It's getting so bad I lost the plot last night. Fed DD2 at 8 as usual put her down to sleep, she got up about 15 minutes later bright as a button, she had a good crawl around the carpet etc then she had another BF then off to sleep again on the sofa (I know bad mummy) I carried her up to bed at 11pm and she woke up, she needed another BF to get off to sleep, I dozed off and about 20 minutes later she woke again, I tried dummy (no chance) tried rocking her, soothing her etc but the only thing that worked was boob, thing is it can't be hunger that's waking her, it's this reliance on the boob to get to sleep. DP has tried with EBM too and no joy.

She has completely changed as she was really good and would go off to sleep by herself and if she woke dummy would do the job. I think as she has got older she just wants boob and me. I don't know how we have arrived at this situation but it's driving me mad. Only time she will sleep without boob is in the car or pram.

There's even part of me thinking would a bottle of formula make any difference I'm getting to the stage where I will try anything.

I've tried the usual bath, massage, quiet time, up to bed, BF, put down in bedside cot next to me but she's up about 10-20 mins later, tried giving her water instead of BF (no joy), when you are so shattered and you are scared of waking DD1 and DP is up at 6am it's so much easier just to lift your top and say there you go. I'm getting to the stage though where I'm resenting her feeding off me especially at night and sometimes feel like saying "get off me!"

Message withdrawn

I had thi swith my dd2. It depends how irritated you are by it. Dd2's upping the night feeds was definitely caused in part by her not getting enough solid food by day. I was okay at 8 mo but it did really get too much in the end, I went cold turkey at 22 mo (by which time I was 20 wks pg with ds). It meant a week of screaming but she stopped.

I will be stopping BFing around the 12 month mark as we want to ttc no 3 next year and I want 6 months of haivng my body back and buiding myself up for the next pregnancy (mad I know) as I was BFing DD1 when I became pregnant with DD2. DD1 slept 11-6am from 6 weeks, was a speed feeder, never cried for food I had to remember to feed her, came off the boob so easily at 12 months I didn't even need to try.

I do not want to stop BFing I just want DD2 to sleep, if I BF her to sleep and she slept from 8 until 7am even with one feed inbetween that would be fine. She eats loads of food in the day much more than DD1 ever did (as does now). It's just so hard when you are so sleep deprived you finally get off to sleep only to be wakened by her and only a BF will calm her down. She must sleep for about 10 hours total in 24 hours not normal for an 8 month old?

i had this with DS and DD. I tried giving DS a bottle of formula, from when he was about 7.5 months, before he went to bed. IT didn't make an immediate difference. He just started to sleep better after a couple of months, and was only waking once by the time he was a year old. DD is now 7 months and sometimes wakes me 4 times in a night, though usually it's twice, just for a suck. Also she usually wakes after 45 minutes of going to sleep at 7pm, and I feed her to sleep again. Tried to be strict for a few nights but it didn't seem to work and I was knackered after spending most of the night rocking her to sleep instead of feeding her. Gave up I've tried formula with her but she won't take it. I'd try it with yours, you can still combination feed (fed DS till 13 months).

I have this too and our first child DS is only 8 days old...after a couple of days of letting him cry it out DH and I were exhausted and are now co-sleepimg...I'm disheartened to hear it goes on for months - yikes!

Hope more Mums come on with more advice.

pinkypig - please don't let a 8 day old baby cry it out, they are far too young. In the early days all they want to do is suck, breastfeeding is still getting established and they still think they are a part of you. They are so small and tiny, cosleeping is great I love it although DD2 now takes up most of the bed. When they are this little just carry them, feed them as often as they want, it passes so quickly. Please don't be disheartened they aren't all like my DD2, DD1 slept from 11-6am at 6 weeks and from 8-8pm at 12 weeks so you may be lucky.

My dd2 breastfed around the clock for a month, then slept through. You can't let a tiny baby cry it out, if they cry it is because they need something. My problems came with weaning, which you may well be able to avoid.

it is with emormous relief that i read sweetkittys 'another thread about my 8 month old' posted saturday. my 8 mo dd1 is breastfed and eats during the day no matter what i try she feeds all night. i reckon on getting maybe 3 hours accumulative sleep each night at the mo. i had just begun to think my face might slide off with fatigue and i was doing something wrong when i came across this website. does anyone else experience this and where do we go from here? dh, dd and self all sleep in a huge bed together so we dont disturb one another but baby just wants to snuggle up to my boobs all night - shes not even really feeding can anyone shed some light or tell me they experience this too? thanks

sweetkitty lots of sympathy. My dd (5) was a better sleeper (marginally) than my ds (2.5) - he didn't sleep through until 9 months and we had got into bad habits of a bottle in the night to quieten him and stop him waking dd. I consulted an excellent sleep specialist and she really helped with a gentle approach that wouldn't disturb dd (I didn't want to do too much controlled crying especially at 5am because of waking my dd). She was fantastic. If you want her details email me on [email protected]

Also meant to add that the sleep lady said that at 9 months if weaned and on a good diet they don't need food in the night and it's 'learned' hunger so you have to sympathetically wean them off whilst reassuring them. All easier said than done I know. She did wonders for my ds though.

eltajin - big sympathy looks like we're all in the same boat (ie one that is rapidly sinking into a sea of tiredness ).

Sweetkitty - how ru doing honey? ((hug))

Hi, I have an 8 month old who is breastfed and wakes twice in the night for feeds each night, 1am and 4am. He eats stacks of solids but can't go to sleep unless he breastfeeds. Feel better that there are others out there who are having a similar time. Any ideas how to wean off nightfeeds (without any tears or effort on my part as am too tired to faff for hours)

I'm just resurrecting this thread as it seems to mirror the questions I have...8 month old...waking up lots in the night for bf's. He eats well in the day and doesn't really want to feed except at night. A bit of me feels like if I try to stop the night feeds he wont be taking any milk at all so I don't want that. But I do want some sleep....please!!! Any suggestions?

I'm in the same sinking boat too. My dd (almost 9 months) is a serious boob addict. I work full time and it feels like the only way I will get any sleep is if I give in and give her the boob. But, then, she is boob dependent and wakes up REPEATEDLY during the night (if she sleeps for over 2 hours straight, I wake up and start checking to see if she's breathing!). It's a viscious cycle that I don't have the energy to try to get out of...
Some people have suggested having a partner / other sympathetic person take on night duty for awhile so as to wean off the boob. Has anyone else tried that? I just worry as dd gets hysterical if I'm even nearby and she can't get to the boob...