"Crying down" to get to sleep

[Flingmoo]

I have always been against CIO/CC methods but recently discovered that my baby goes off to sleep easier at bedtime and naps if I let him cry for somewhere between 1-5 minutes before going and giving him a little stroke on the back and popping the dummy in. Usually have to repeat at least once and sometimes quite a few times, Sometimes after a couple of minutes of crying he'll just fall asleep on his own.

I feel a little bit bad as it feels like I'm letting my baby cry himself to sleep. Am I a terrible mummy? Will this be damaging him? It's the only way he'll have regular naps apart from the occasions where he BFs to sleep. I feel like I'm inadvertently Gina Ford-ing him! What are your thoughts?

No, the baby whisperer talks about 'mantra cries' eg. The moaning cry babies do to send themselves to sleep. Sounds different from proper cries. She says not to go in if they are doing this as you will interfer with sending themselves to sleep. My dd is now 4 and her mantra cry was loud but I could tell when it changed to a proper cry. At some point (maybe when she started talking) she grew out of it. Some babies just need to make a noise to block out the rest of the world I think and no one falls asleep as soon as their head hits the pillow.

Hmm, never heard of that! Thanks! Don't know much about the baby whisperer, only read the opposing views of GF vs No Cry Sleep Solution.

(Wish one of these experts really did have a magic solution for baby sleep though...)

Google baby whisperer forums and mantra cry and there should be lots of info. Have used the BW a lot and seems to make sense to me. Sort of a middle ground between no cry and Gina!

Ds does this, he cries (not a distressed cry) for a few minutes before going to sleep. I think its just his way of winding down. A friends baby does it as well.

Mine did something similar as a small baby, about 15mins of shouting and then sleep. He does the same now when he's really tired and in the pushchair, it's not crying, it is more like shouting/squawking, and it's usually a reliable sign that he'll be asleep soon.

Yes same here. my ds is 11 months and when I first pop him in his cot he has a big scream of protest, then after 20 seconds it switches to a sort of annoyed moany cry. not like his other cries at all. He is asleep within 4 minutes. since I've been leaving hi. to do this he has gone from waking 5+ times a night to sleeping through so I refuse to feel guilty!!

Mine have both done this, they both sort of 'moaned' to sleep when they were tiny (my friends used to laugh because it was sometimes really loud) then DD sang herself to sleep and DS would cry a bit but it definitely wasn't distressed. Unfortunately it took me 16 months to let DS 'do his thing' and have a little cry, I would go back in over and over to settle him. One night I had to leave him because DD fell out of bed and needed my attention and he was asleep within ten minutes, he slept 13 hours straight every night from then whereas before this he was up twice a night. I feel so guilty!!!