Hello, I'm writing to ask if anyone who has been through this can give me a little bit of hope... I have an almost 4 months old baby who will not let me lie him down in his crib or cot, if I put him in asleep he wakes up and screams, if I lie him down awake he screams... (I'm talking proper crying - I let him moan and grizzle for a bit as I know that's normal but it very quickly turn to full on blue murder screaming).
Since his birth he was never great at lying in the crib but if I put him in deeply asleep he used to stay in it, in fact from 7 to 11 weeks and with the help of a Sleepyhead, if I laid him down once he was in a deep sleep he'd go 11pm to 4.30am which was totally amazing. Since he hit 3 months though there's just no way he'll go in. I've tried hot water bottles, lying him on his side/belly, putting one of my worn tshirts in with him... Nothing seems to work! He's on ranitidine for reflux and that now seems more or less under control. Atm he sleeps in bed with me but i am so uncomfortable with him there, I hardly get any sleep myself. I have nothing against co-sleeping for a few months but I'm terrified at the thought of having a one year old in bed with me still, I can't go on sleeping so badly for that long...
I'm feeling really quite low, don't know what to do. He's clearly exhausted because he only falls/stays asleep in my arms, particularly whilst breastfeeding (during the day I have him in the sling a lot) so often gets woken up when I move if he's just in my arms and not in the sling.
I also have a 21 months old so it's a massive struggle to have the baby in my arms the whole time. I feel like my life is a complete mess, I just don't see how I'll ever get him in his crib given my toddler doesn't let me concentrate on the baby for very long. The baby also cries very quickly if he is left in the bouncer or on the playmat for more than 5 minutes (he's always been like that) so I struggle to look after my toddler - I feel like I'm letting them both down.
I don't really like the idea of CIO (if he cries for more than a few minutes he becomes hysterical and very, very hard to console - takes like half an hour).
I doubt anyone will have a miracle cure but as the situation is starting to make me feel really quite low I wanted to ask if anyone who was in the same boat has seen an improvement by just "going with the flow"/not using CIO and if so, by what age? Im hoping this is an age thing and I just need a bit of hope to get me through... My first son wasn't the easiest baby in the world but at least he accepted being laid down so this is unknown territory to me!
Sorry for the stupidly long post, I just really need to talk about it... Worried how long I can cope like that! Thanks in advance for your replies.