those who get babies into a rouine - how?

[eggybrokenoff]

I recently had ds3 after ds 1 - shocking terrible sleeper to the point I was a bit deranged with sleep deprivation, ds2 who was an angel until 14 weeks when he changed overnight to a nightmare. ds3 has started quite chilled but seems to be heading down the feed to sleep only, very unsettled route.

reading up yet again on sleep books/blogs and celeb opinions people talk about 'getting baby in a routine'. but how do people do it? if you have a bedtime routine and they wont sleep at the end of it then what? if they wake at night 40 mins after falling asleep how do you get them back down without a 'prop' of some kind. I know plenty of great parents who have babies who all slept through early and had a nice predictable routine. some of it must be down to parenting as well as the baby.

so what are the top tips?

Hello, my lo has had a routine since about 2 weeks(I know controversial but it worked for us) we just started doing the same thing each night and it clicked after few nights, I find if she wakes not long after I have put her down she is still hungry she is ebf so feed her again normally only another 10 mins or so depending on how long she has had before going down.

Eggy I know how you feel! We're very much go with the flow here and I don't know how to do it any other way.

However, DC2 has so far been a much better sleeper than DC1. I put it down to a real focus on making sure he's full ahead of the night. Big big feed in the evening with only his nappy on to keep him cool and awake, then wake him up by changing / putting PJs on and feed some more.

Similarly during the night feed none of the "ooh I think he's asleep let's put him back in bed" I used to do with DC1, but bf on one side, wake him up if he gets sleepy, then bf on other side to make sure he's really full.

But having said all that, I'm no expert and who knows if this good sleeping will last...

I think a lot of the routine working is about starting the day at the same time no matter what and aiming for naps at roughly the same time so they aren't overtired by bedtime or before feeds ?

It worked very quickly with ds1 but took a lot more time for ds2.

see I think I do all this. same bedtime routine same time each night. up at same time every day, same morning based around school run, roughly same pattern of activity each day. but in evenings despite being tired he fights sleep for hours, is erratic through the night and doesnt seem to have a nap pattern. perhaps my older two are teaching him as some sort of conspiracy to make me go crazy

Haahooo but how does that get your baby to fall asleep?

I feed both sides as much as I can. When I think he is suckling on empty I change his nappy and offer a bottle of milk expressed that morning (I can't seem to fill his belly in the evenings. He will guzzle anything from 70 to 200ml. If he doesn't conk out then, I'm in trouble. He won't fall asleep, he'll squirm and wriggle and kick about, getting more and more upset unless I put him to the boob for some comfort suckling.

without the bottle I used to get 90-120 minutes of sleep out of him. Since doing the bottle I can sometimes get 3 hours or more. We even once had 7 hours!

He tends to fall asleep 10-11pm, having worked at getting him settled from about 8 or 9 ish (after toddler is settled in bed).

Nutella in terms of feeding we're pretty similar:

DS (12 weeks) feeds on both sides between 6pm and 7pm, with some breaks for winding etc. Then he has his bath and after that has 180ml of expressed milk from a bottle, making sure he stays awake by having him in nappy only for most of that bottle. By the end (7.30 or 8pm usually) it he is still awake but really full and tired, so put him in his bed and then he falls asleep in the next 10-15 minutes. He might stir a bit but usually goes to sleep by himself.

But I completely appreciate this doesn't work for all babies!! With DD I spent a year rocking and feeding her to sleep.... In the end so much depends on what each individual baby is like!