Rock bottom

[roadtripper]

It's 5.50 and I've already been up for two hours. My 3 year old woke up at 3.50 and only just went back to sleep. Meanwhile my 10 month old fed at midnight (still wont take a bottle) and got up for the day at 4.30.

It's not always this bad but I'm always up by 5.30 and the baby has gone back to needing at least one feed in the night. I think it's separation anxiety as my DH used to be able to settle her.

I'm so tired, I'm fat but can't stop eating sugar to keep me going, I think my marriage is about to snap and sometimes, at 5am, I hate my children. I can't think straight enough to formulate a plan to fix it all.

This is a very self indulgent post but I just had to talk to someone. Anyone through the other side of something like this?

I fully understand where you're coming from! Firstly, have you tried a gro clock for your three year old and do you have blackout blinds? I would highly recommend both. Secondly, my 10 month old also wakes at least once so this isn't uncommon, she's an early riser but she's also better of her room is very dark. She'll be getting a gro clock for her 1st birthday so she gets used to having it in her room!!

Thanks for the reply

I have blackout blinds for both and a gro clock for the toddler but I have probably totally undermined the gro clock by letting him get up a bit before it in 'good sleep' periods. Got strict today though hence back to sleep eventually. I am going to try to make it a thing.

Trouble is he's just become afraid of the dark so I don't want to be too hard on him when he wakes at night (he's now got a nightlight, door open with hall light on).

I recently took the sides of his cotbed so I'm sure that's why he's waking. Maybe I should put them back on? But he's 3 so in theory he should be ready... Everything feels like its going backwards!

I think a lot of us can understand how you feel.

I have twins and until they were 18 months they both woke up at least twice a night. It was horrific. Everything about my life was coloured by sleep depravation. I hated my husband, body, food consumption. You know this I think but it's all about the sleep and it all gets better once they sleep through but knowing that doesn't help does it??

They are v change resistant are 3 year olds. Mine ran around the house all night for 2 weeks when they got there new beds. Could you implement rewards for staying in bed? I know this is bad parenting and don't give a shit but mine have recently been running round the house all evening instead if sleeping. I told them they'd have a gummy snake for breakfast if they stayed in bed. I then held them over the bin when they got out of bed. It worked a treat.

I know it might be different though at 3 am when they are scared of the dark.

I've been thinking maybe rewards might work. I just sometimes wonder if he is quite able to grasp the concept of delayed gratification! A reward chart didn't work but a one off easily identifiable reward might.

Gahhh you've reminded me there's a lot that have it worse though. Sorry for being such a whinger

We went through this with our 2 year old after new baby came home. Sticker chart didn't work by itself- she couldn't see the end result. What did work was putting a treat( new toy) out of reach on her tall boy, and reminding her at bedtime that if she stayed in her own bed until the sun came up 5 times (5 stars) she could have it. She then got the gist of the gro clock- she now stays in bed 'to make mummy happy'.

I would do anything for one wake up with my 8 month old!

I use blackout blinds for my toddler and baby to trick their body clocks in the summer! I guess you have tried doing things like changing time of bedtime?

I am at a younger stage than you, a 3 month old who barely sleeps in the day due to constant interruptions and pace of life with a lively, loud 2 year old. I am being horrible to my DH and quite frankly, to my children. Sometimes I get so cross with them. Yesterday we spent the day with one or other crying. And I fainted, assuming due to tiredness and stress! Just lucky I wasn't holding the baby.

I think we often underestimate what effect sleep deprivation has on our bodies. I blame. It for everything! I mean, how can you stay sane on four hours sleep a night? Sorry, not massively helpful post, just wanted to say that you are not alone. I consider six am a lie in!

You are absolutely not being a whinger! Being woken up in the middle of a deep sleep is hell.

Seriously, go for the sweet rewards. Then phase them out after a few days. They eventually forget why they are doing the right thing.

Good luck.