7.5 months and waking every 2 hours. Am passed the end of my tether.

[Madamecastafiore]

Just need some advice please ladies.

DD has started to wake every 2 hours again and goes to sleep feeding so I am now at the stage where I can't see straight for tiredness.

I need to tackle the feeding issue, I want to stop feeding now and also get her to fall asleep I her cot.

She goes ballistic though. Stiff and screams and scream, going In and shushing her or patting her doesn't make a dent in the small rigid screaming creature in the cot at all.

Do I tackle everything at once and starve her until she takes a bottle (she used to but stopped abut 3.5m) and hope that fills her up so she sleeps longer and do I just put her I her cot and wait it out until she cries herself to sleep. Do I do it during the day (I normally take her for a walk and she falls asleep I her pushchair where she remains for the duration of her one daily nap) also so she knows that when she is put in her cot she goes to sleep in there or will it make her hate her cot?

I don't want to be horrid to her but I really am at the end of my tether. My IBS is bad at the moment and I feel so weak and tired and can't take anything to help whilst breastfeeding.

I really don't think I can go on being woken up every 2 hours without going crazy or dropping down with exhaustion. I have 2 older children and a busy life with DH working at a stressful job and all the running around 3 kids and running a house that entails.

I need to do some thing but don't want to scar the poor little mite for the rest of her life thinking that we are abandoning her.

She is wonderful other than this. Eats all kinds of food, waves to you when you say hello or good bye, is nearly crawling can go at about 20 mph in her baby walker, sit up and is adorable, huge blue eyes and crazy hair. She is easy going and happy during the day, always smiling and babbling away, then the night falls and her alter ego takes over!

Wow, you could be describing my baby exactly madame! She's been like this since around 6 months, and I'm also knackered. I've tried reducing the length of her night breast feeds to try and stop her feeding to sleep, but it only means she wakes up more often.

Watching for any ideas with increasing desperation

Well she upstairs screaming her head off. Is v v tired and DH off today as had the snip yesterday. He is going to persevere trying to give her a bottle today. Cold Turkey time!

Will keep you posted. It heartbreaking though.

I don't think feeding more or formula will help. She's more likely waking coz she's used to falling asleep on the boob and needs it to go back to sleep when she stirs between sleep cycles in the night. Unless you want to go with it and co-sleep so that you get a bit more sleep, then you will have to teach her to self-settle, which probably will involve some crying. Honestly, it's not ideal but you have to look at the big picture of all your needs - it sounds like you're risking getting ill by not dealing with the problem.

If you've got the money, I'd recommend using a sleep consultant. I used Andrea Grace as I felt I needed someone to help me get through it and give me a plan I'd stick to.

Hope things get better for you.

I had this issue with my eldest and we ended up doing sleep training. I got the HV to do a home visit and help me write up a plan and I had to follow it for every single sleep and nap time. It was sorted within 2 weeks.
First I spent all day feeding him up and reducing the night feeds so I knew he wasn't hungry. He had a dummy and comforter but still wanted feeding to sleep (all my babies got used to the feeling of a full tummy all night so would wake up even if not particularly hungry and it took a few weeks for them to get used to not having a tummy full of milk). I gave them a small bowl of weetabix or a banana just before the night feed, after dinner or potato and rice or similar to really fill them up.

Thanks chaps.

We are seeing the health visitor next Tuesday for some help but I'll take on board what you are saying.

She is asleep at the moment and we are going to spend a couple of hours trying to fill her up as much as we can before she goes to bed. Will also do a dream feed as well (ha ha who am I kidding, she will be awake for that no trouble!).

DH said will look into sleep specialist person if we don't crack it with the filling her up, cuddling back to sleep (DH, not me) and refusing to give her boob during the night.

Shud I up her down when she is awake rather than rock or cuddle her though? DH sits and pats her and shushes her but I don't know if that is just replacing one crutch with another?

I had similar with dd at this age, she's now 9 months.

With the bottle she had always had the odd expressed bottle no problem then suddenly started refusing it at 7 months. The first time she did this I was in work and she took no milk all day. The solution we found was handles for the bottles so she could feed herself (we discovered this after putting milk in a sippy cup in desperation when we were going out for my birthday). After a couple of weeks of having at least 1 bottle every day using handles she was happy to let us feed her again, although we had to use completely different positions to breast feeding. She likes to sit up and lean back on us to feed or lie on the floor next to us.

I started cutting out night feeds one at a time. I had to steel myself for having a few tough nights and being prepared to be up for hours with her, but it wasn't that bad. She was feeding at 11, 1 and 4 at the time. I started with the 11pm feed and just did all the other things that breastfeeding would normally encompass, so I would cuddle her back to sleep like after a feed. She took to this quickly and then moved her 1am feed back to 2, then 3 and dropping the 4am one altogether. She started taking less and less on the later feed and the week I decided to drop that feed too I didn't need to as she dropped it herself.

Madame, if it works for DH to shhh and pay her, then go with that. It's far better for her to fall asleep in her cot than in your arms. As she gets more used to it you can gradually reduce the amount of physical contact and whiten down the shhhing, so that she needs less and less help from you.

When we night weaned my husband did night duty for 5 nights and DD began sleeping 9 hours straight - after waking every 1-2 hours. We had to do it this way as she would vomit if left alone and get very upset if I didn't give into breastfeeding. Their tummy's get used to milk at night so it takes a little while to get used to going without. Was worth the 5 difficult nights though. Here's our story if you're interested on my blog - mydaughterwontsleep.com/2014/02/06/is-breast-best-when-it-comes-to-sleep-apparently-not/
Good luck

That's really interesting, thank you. It seems that I have a lot to learn even with this being DC3!

DH looked after her last night. She woke twice and he rocked and shushed her back to sleep. He said thought this was best way to do it get her used to not having milk and then get her used to self settling rather than doing it all at once. And you know what I am more than happy for him to take the lead on this as am at the end of my tether!

Will continue reading and learning though for the next step of the journey!

She is so bloody cute though.

Teething possibly? Sorry I can't see it mentioned yet and it's the thing that keeps mine awake the most. It does pass, you get a good few weeks then another crap few. There's no need to sleep train but if you keep as near as poss to the baby (co sleep or same room etc) it minimises the impact on your nights x

they all do this IME

Great that you've got him to help. You could do with the sleep and he's much more likely to be successful with cuddling and shushing. If you go in she'd just scream for boob!

I may have misunderstood your post, but are you saying she only has one nap in the daytime? I would expect her need at least 2 at 7.5 mo, totalling 3-4 hours. At 9mo my dd needs 2 good naps. Could over tiredness be part of the problem?

Yes tiredness I think is part of it but she fights sleep.

She not been fed back to sleep last couple of nights so life a little easier. Has 2 new teeth and I am trying to get her to sleep better during the day.

I also think she is lactose intolerant so really being careful with diet. Awful wind, bloated tummy and loose stools as well as vomiting.

Fingers crossed seething will work!