4am wake ups: tell me what to do.

[Cbell]

My DS is 11 mo and mistakenly believes the day starts at 4am, how do I convince him otherwise?

At 9 months we started sleep training (mostly cc) and have got him sleeping, pretty consistently, from 7pm till 4am. Initially we were willing to accept the 4am wake ups as we didn't want to use cc in the mornings as well as evenings. It has not been a method that we have been entirely happy with so please no judgement.

I would like to find a way of extending his night times. Any ideas?

At 4am if I try stroking him he generally just keeps wriggling around until I BF him, they he's awake for the day. His morning nap is normally 8.30am for about an hour then another in the afternoon around 2-3.30pm.
His bedtime is at 7pm and by this time he is generally tired and settled with a bit of stroking.

What have you tried that's worked?

Give him half a banana before bed.

I would try keeping him up later

I have no idea. My 11mo DD keeps waking up at 4am too.

What if you bf him the minute he squeaks? Or even set your alarm and get him before he calls out?
My 9mo old is still having a bf at 4 but thankfully treats it as a night feed and goes back to sleep, but I bf him right away so he doesn't get too wakeful.

I would try pushing both naps back so the last one ends about 2-3 hours before bedtime - hopefully no over tiredness then. 8.30am is really early for a first nap but obviously I can understand that if wake up is at 4 am it's about right... just try and push it back as much as you can.

Both mine were early risers and in the end I more or less resigned myself to starting the day at 5 am and getting out and about for 8.30am and then home for nap at about 11. I gradually pushed back naps until I managed that sort of routine but have never been successful in making wake up later than 5.30 at the latest until about 2-3 sorry! Even my 11 year old still wakes at 6 am on a weekend!

What would happen if you delay feeding for 15mins for a few nights? You might find starts waking at the later time? Rinse and repeat?

Same boat here... 11 month old waking at 4am. Im going to try wake to sleep as its just a habit I think

DD2's first nap had crept forward to 8:15/8:30 with the 4am starts. I tried putting it back to 9:30, but it didn't seem to make any difference.
This morning she woke just before 4. I waited a bit, then gave her a drink & then BF her. She went back to sleep from 5-7:30!!! Last night we put up bin bags to darken the room.
During the daytime I just put her in the cot for her naps and she settles herself with no fuss at all. She just doesn't seem able to do it in the mornings, but I think she is thirsty/hungry when she wakes from the way she takes a drink/looks for BF.

Do you have a blackout blind, Cbell?

Hi I have same problem - 10 mth old wakes between 4 15 and 4 45. I just read an old thread recommending exposure to daylight just before bed. It seemed to work for at least half that tried it. Gonna try it tonight!

I have a one year old that is waking at 4am. What is the theory behind exposing them to daylight?

DS started doing this as the mornings got lighter, have you considered this?

Forgive me if you have tried this; as soon as I blacked out the windows and made his room pitch black, it was back to 7.30 again.

We've blacked out DD2's room & the first 2 mornings she woke at 4, but went back to sleep after a BF (& me patting her back in the cot) until 6:30-ish. (She hadn't re-settled after BF in the lighter room). This morning she woke at 4:45 & I BF her & after I put her back to bed she went back to sleep until 6:30 again.

DD did this (and still does occasionally) It's almost always because she's hungry - if I fed her ASAP she'd go back to sleep. Sometimes she'd fart around for a bit but I brought her in to our bed and ignored her and she'd conk out!

Thanks for the advice and sorry for the late reply we've been on holiday.

It could be food related although supper is at 5.30-6pm and bed at 7pm with BF so he's full up.

Not issue of light as it's bloody dark at 4am.

I'm wondering if it's just habit?! Usually it's his first wake up of the night so maybe he needs to learn that it's still bedtime.

If I BF, he just rolls around chatting, if I leave him he cries. We'd be happy with 5am but 4am is a joke.

Same here. 11 month old, 4am or there abouts for the past 3 months. It's hard.....I have no advice and feel I have tried everything and need to just ride it out ??
Will be watching this thread for a magical piece of wisdom though!

Hi there,

Not sure if this will be any help but my DD1 used to wake for a feed at this time but would usually go back off again. When I stopped the feed at around 17 months, she continued to wake up but wouldn't go back to sleep without the feed. I treated it as a night waking, so kept everything as dark and quiet as possible, would get on a fold out bed in her room with a duvet and pretend to go back to sleep, saying shh, night time, back to sleep. It would take a while, but she almost always went back to sleep eventually and we would both get a bit more sleep. Eventually, she stopped waking up altogether. She would fuss and cry a little but I felt she was OK with me being there and it meant she didn't get into the habit of coming into our bed at dawn! She occasionally still gets up early but usually her wake up time is around 7 - this is nearly a year later.

Good luck!