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Sleep

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Original poster

4 month old - i need URGENT advice please!

19 replies

Mandymoo · 05/09/2006 19:41

DS 4 months old and bfed
Hardley ever sleeps in the day (mainly due to dd noise levels when she plays!)

Normally goes to bed at 7pm (feeding off me) and then wakes at:
1.30am
3.00am
3.30am
4.00am
5.00am
6.00am

I, being the lazy cow i am, instincitvely shove my boob in his mouth and he almost immediately goes back to sleep again. Trouble is, i've obviously made a rod for my own back now and i need for him to have a better night routine.

I dont mind co-sleeping but at 4 months old surely he shouldnt be waking this much?

Any advice?

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Mum2FunkyDude · 05/09/2006 19:43

Yes, I think you probably already know the answer, it appears that you are pacifying him. He should be able to stretch at least 4-5 hours at night. Have dh get up and soothe him back to sleep, it maight take a few nights, but you'll be much happier at the end.

Original poster

Mandymoo · 05/09/2006 19:44

We have tried that over the past few nights but his bawling then wakes up dd - i know we have to get him settled but cant bear the thought of having to deal with dd at that time of night too

OP posts:

Bozza · 05/09/2006 19:46

Are you making sure he gets a good full feed when he wakes rather than a couple of sucks and back to sleep?

Bozza · 05/09/2006 19:47

Oh sorry just read that you are. Maybe try ensuring he has a good feed, so perhaps properly waking him up etc.

lisasimpson · 05/09/2006 19:50

I agree with mum2funkydude, DH might be the better person to try and pacify (so not sure if co-sleeping would be the best) and it could be a rough few nights - but the long term gain will be worth it. Can anyone else have your dd whilst you try it?

lisasimpson · 05/09/2006 19:52

meant to add - would you consider a dummy - it might help determining the need to suck from the need to feed?

bramblina · 05/09/2006 19:53

My ds was waking sometimes when my friend's ds of same age wasn't and I just thought, is it out of habit? He would not take much of a feed, although always happy to go back, he didn't need me to fall asleep, he just seemed to think waking meant a wee suck! So one night I just lifted him, cuddled him and put him back down, he was fine. The next night I ignored him and he went right back off. I don't have any other children to be concerned about though, and he was not very noisy. Does he still share your room? Could you have him in with you to ignore, to save waking your dd? Have you tried other ways of calming him, re-swaddling him, offering water (I never did that mind you)? Last thing at night after he's finished his feed could you try to wake him a little so he gets used to sending himself off?

chocolateshoes · 05/09/2006 20:06

The same happened with my DS at that age & a friend of mine suggested giving him a cuddle to settle him rather than automatically diving in with milk. And it worked! I then managed to stretch the time between feeds. Although he didn't 'sleep through' til he was 5mths. Some people suggest trying giving a bottle of water but I found that as DS was b/fed he wasn't interested at all in a bottle. It just made him cry more!

Original poster

Mandymoo · 05/09/2006 20:07

He does have a dummy but sometimes thats more hassle than its worth as it falls out and then that wakes him!

Its not really practical for dd to go anywhere overnight - 1 night perhaps but would be unfair for it to be any more than that i think.

We put him in a sleeping bag at night which he seems ok in - havent swaddled him for a few months.

Would you suggest i just keep replacing the dummy and resign myself to the fact its going to be a rough few nights and just get on with?

OP posts:

Mum2FunkyDude · 05/09/2006 20:08

Mandymoo, can you send dd to a granparent over a weekend? Maybe that will give you enough time to sort out lo?

Original poster

Mandymoo · 05/09/2006 20:10

yeah, she could go to mums who is literally 5 mins away.

OP posts:

samnbabes · 05/09/2006 20:34

Just a word of encouragement - our dd (now 5 1/2 months) was like this about 3 weeks ago - blimey, it's just so easy to wop an boob in their gobs...

We decided enough was enough - and that night she slept 5 hours solid for first time in ages(had clearly crept down the stairs and heard us making 'right that's it noises') We were amazed how quickly she sorted herself out - had expected a big ol' fight. First night she complained for 3/4 hour or so, then sucked her thumb/whinged a bit for another 3/4 hour. But since then has only woken once a night. And settles herself after a quick rub. Have to say, dh did it - I said she'd smell milk otherwise

Does dd always wake when she cries - our ds sleeps through dds cried and is generally woken by bloomin' anything....

bramblina · 05/09/2006 20:42

I had tried a grobag at about 4 months but ds's hands would wake him up, and we ended up swaddling him till 5 months. Is it worth trying that again? I will swaddle next baby for as long.

kittywits · 05/09/2006 20:51

Try an amby hammock. I'm always going on about them. but this will allow you both to get some much needed shut eye.

chocolateshoes · 05/09/2006 20:59

ooh, I forgot to add that as well as sleeping in a gro-bag we tucked him in really firmly - so that the sheet went horizontally accross him & then under the mattress. Then we jammed rolloed up towels between them cot bars & the mattress so make sure it was really fim. This seemed to stop him thrashing about such a lot & I do think it helped.

Original poster

Mandymoo · 05/09/2006 21:01

DD doesnt always wake when ds cries but he does have a particularly loud cry!

Will try swaddling again and see what happens

Thanks for your suggestions X

OP posts:

angelhunter · 07/09/2006 05:06

Still swaddling my five month baby girl as it helps her feel secure maybe thats part of the problem.She geenerally sleeps from 6pm till about 2-3 then sleeps again till 6-7

CorrieDale · 07/09/2006 07:00

I have to buck the trend here and say that what you're doing is just fine. At 4 months my little bugger seemed to be permanently awake! It's one of those horrible developmental-explosion times when they (ahem) 'may sleep poorly', as one of my developmental books puts it. Deeply understated IMO&E. This phase can last anything from a few days to a few weeks (sorry! probably the last thing you want to hear!) And there are others to come!!!! 9 months (or when they're getting mobile), 12 months (pre-walking and walking), 18 and 24 months. I sound like a prophet of doom, but I found that knowing that when DS started walking was going to result in crap sleep meant that I was better able to cope with it when it happened. I just go with the flow, do what I've been doing all along, and things settle down of their own accord.

WriggleJiggle · 12/09/2006 15:31

Watching this post with great interest. Dd is 5mths and I'm desperate to cut out the 2am feed as I keep falling asleep with her. Am thinking about offering cup of water and a cuddle? Did try offering a bottle of milk but she refused loudly.

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