I'm on crutches with a newborn. Help

[ColdCottage]

All advice taken. I am on crutches due to a slipped disk and have a 3 week old baby, my first.
It is breaking my heart as I can't lift or carry him.
I am very lucky I have family to help in the day while my husband is at work.
The worst time is at night as my husband needs to sleep to be able to work but I can't walk with or pick up the baby to rock him.
I have the cot next to the bed so I can soothe him with my hand and can lift him into bed to feed (husband wakes to change him). But not easy to calm him like this.
My husband is currently walking with him as I sob in bed at not being able to take care of him as I want to.
Please help with tips.

You poor thing - that sounds really tough! I don't have any experience I'm afraid but hopefully someone with more experience will come along soon. In the meantime, a few ideas...

Are you able to rock back and forwards with baby once thier in your arms?
Have you tried white noise to help soothe baby (you can get apps on iPhone and there are things like Ewan the Dream Sheep you can buy)? Or maybe you could get a light show you can watch together? My DD used to have a Tomy star show which would keep her quiet and sometimes help her nod off.
Does singing or chatting to your little one calm them at all? I used to find my DD settled when I talked to her in a rhythmic voice, saying the same thing again and again in a quiet monotone. I used to say, "baby's a daft banana, babies a daft banana" over and over. It helped me stay calm too. I'd often be pacing at the same time but chanting softly on it's own might help a bit...
Does your little one have a dummy? Might be worth a try of feeding is well established.

Be kind to yourself. You sound like a lovely caring Mummy doing her best in very difficult circumstances.

Poor you . No experience at all and can't imagine. I know dh needs to sleep, but sleep is broken for all concerned with a new baby.

If I were you, I would sleep with the baby. I've had 3 babies and none of them cried in the night unless they wanted the boob, or company. They were breastfed, so didn't really need burping. I used to sleep with them as they slept so much better and so I got a lot more sleep. I would try co-sleeping. You can use babies own sleeping bag, but let them snuggle up to you and feel your warmth, smell you etc. They love it.

I would recommend co-sleeping too. You get lots of those little newborn baby snuggles.

I'm really sorry to hear about your predicament, but glad to know that you have lots of help. I hope your recovery goes smoothly and you are off the crutches before too long

Thank you all, there are some good ideas there I will try.
He does like his face and the bridge of his nose stroked but as soon as he is asleep his dummy falls out and he wakes up.
I have slipped a disk so going to be 8-12 weeks before I should be better. I can't sit up at night straight or for very long due to the pain so can't even rock him like that sadly.
I did end up with him sleeping for about 1 1/2h next to me in bed but was so paranoid given all the don't bed share information we are told.
Seemed fast asleep and the moment he went back in his cot he woke.
Feeling a little stronger this morning, more able to push the despair and sadness down deep now it's light. Been so strong up until now, just not let myself think about it too much.
They say I need to take dyazapan to help relax everything but can't BF then and I so want to continue. Not only for the bond but also financially and practically.
Just glad that it is me not him that is unwell.

Definitely agree that bedsharing might help. If you are worried about the risks (which are actually quite small if you aren't drinking alcohol, smoking or taking recreational drugs) then consider hiring one of these which allows you to have your baby sleeping right next to you, on the same level as your mattress and infinitely cuddleable but with his own little bit of space so there's no danger of him being rolled on.

With the dummy have you tried slowly pulling it out when he is asleep? I find if I do that she doesn't wake up and want it but if it falls out she will? No idea why! My mum had a terrible slipped disc and was in hospital for weeks before she could go home. They have give her epidural injections (different to labour one) it is very localised and lasts for a couple of months. Could you ask your GP about it? I really feel for you because my mum needed so much support and that was without a newborn! I hope you feel better soon.

can't help you with the practical side but there is chance that you can take the drugs you need to and still breastfeed. Many mums are told they can't when they can. You need to get in touch with the BfN drugs in Breastmilk helpline
[email protected]
They will be able to tell you the exact info on what is safe you may be able to take an lower dose or alternative. they will also send information to your doctor's if you need them to. They are really fantastic please do email them.

In terms of the dummy, I stopped it with one of my children for this reason. It was driving me bonkers. They soon found thumb which was easier. Yes do google the co sleeping to give you some confidence. You will all sleep more! And you can breastfeed lying down too.

MigGrill thank you so much for your tip. I spoke to them and I can take 2mg 3 times a day for 2-3 days without affecting the baby. Spoke to surgery and my sister is picking up the prescription as I type. This is such wonderful news. The first step to getting better rather than just masking the pain.

Great news, they truly are fantastic aren't they. Theyhave helped so many mums I've talked to. each been told they had to stop breastfeeding in order to take medication.

I hope it helps you on the way to recovery. Keep in touch with them they will be happy to answer any questions you have. Good luck.

Yes they are great. The news changed my whole day for the better. Thank you.

Congratulations on your baby. I really feel for you coldcottage, horrible situation. I went through similar with ds a couple of years ago. Co sleeping was the answer for me (although you prob shouldn't while on diazepam). Dh decamped to the spare room for a while so we had plenty of space. I also had a steroid epidural via the pain clinic at about 6 weeks which was a relief. There are other meds you can take, speak to your gp if not improving. It will get easier!

C shaped towel and sheet to make a bed nest worked a treat last night. Got 3/2/2 hours sleep last night!