18 month old "Princess and the Pea" still wakes almost every night

[minipie]

DD has never been a great sleeper.

She was 6 weeks premature and for first 3 months slept only propped on my chest (day and night). Undetected tongue tie and resulting reflux/bad wind didn't help. We got into rocking to sleep habit which was only "fixed" by CC.

As an older baby/toddler she can self settle and doesn't have milk in the night. However she seems to require far less sleep than the average (she's only needed about 11.5 hours including naps ever since about 10 months old). She doesn't welcome sleep and will fight naps unless really tired. She is an incredibly light sleeper and will wake up any time she has a cold or is teething (even if the cold/teething isn't bad and isn't bothering her in the day). She will wake up if the room is too hot, too cold, if she coughs, if it's too light... you get the picture. If she wakes, she will only go back to sleep with water (and quite often calpol/nurofen) and cuddles - or lengthy crying if we don't give the water/medicine/cuddles. If it's after 5am it's very difficult to get her to go back to sleep.

All this means that while she can sleep through, she only does so when everything is perfect.

Sigh.

Anyone else had one like this? Anything I can do?

No advice as exactly the same here! 19 months of sporadic sleeping thru requiring water/CC/meds to go back to sleep. Having full on rages the last few nights

Ah hi elvis it helps to know I'm not alone at least! Rages - your DC or you ?

I feel really judged by other parents I know whose babies all slept through from 6/7 months if not before. I think they are convinced it's down to me allowing/creating bad habits. But I've done exactly the same as them... just got a sleep hating child!

She rages and I despair! DH is crap at nights and when she wakes he says I should leave her indefinitely. CC was a compromise and has helped.
I read somewhere that the more intelligent children need less sleep so I'm clutching onto that! Am PG ATM too, due in 8 weeks so at least I'm used to sleeplessness!

my 21 month old has been like that her whole life. Gave up napping at 16 months

I have a 4 year old too, who's a good sleeper, so I know it's just her personality, rather than something I've cocked up along the way...

However, sometimes in the wee small hours I do think she's trying to torture me.

I would say it's entirely normal for a child to wake once or twice a night, and for them to often need reassurance to help them fall asleep again.

My twins are 3yrs 7mo and still wake once or twice a night. They have slept through on a handful of occasions, but nothing regular.

I think when people talk about 'sleeping through', some of them mean 'no feeds', some mean 'no wakings except or feeds', some of them mean '5 hours straight', and some of them are plain lying. Try not to compare your baby to other babies too much :)

I think my son (1yesterday : ) ) is like this. Can do 3/4 hour stretches (6 once). Can self settle.

However quite often we are on hourly wake ups and will only feed back to sleep. He has never napped the amount he's 'supposed' to for his age. Illness makes him sleep less, not more (like some magical babies I've heard of).

Anything that can disrupt his sleep will.

I'd also heard about the intelligence thing. I keep looking for other signs he might be a genius, but he's still eating books rather than reading them . . .

Hah yes I've heard the intelligence thing too, at this rate she's going to be the next Einstein. I think it's something they tell parents of non sleepers to make them feel better

elvis we are currently ttc number 2 - I can't bear the thought of two waking children so just have to pray it improves. best of luck!

roar we still have naps but bet it won't be long. At least you got one good sleeper - Sod's law says I'll get another just the same.

happy I'd like to believe this is normal and everyone else is lying but I don't. I think that "sleeping through" for a child above, say, 10 months means an unbroken stretch of 9+ hours and I think that most people I know have got children who do this. I can tell from their looks of pity when I describe my DD...

Emma you have reminded me there are worse out there... We often only get one wake up and get 5 hours either side, so your tale of hourly wake ups makes me grateful. Hope your DS improves soon.

Anyone out there who had a child like this and they magically started sleeping through all the time at, say, 19 months?

My DD stayed at my MIL one night who said she'd slept for 12 hours straight through
.... On questioning she had woken twice, needing resettling once and a bottle once. I don't class that as SSTN!!

I have dd1 that slept through (12 hours, no waking) from 4 months. We didn't do a thing, she just liked sleeping and napped 2 hours ever afternoon till she was almost 3.

Then we had dd2. She is 3.4 and although is no longer waking every night, a good week includes a couple of wakings and sleeping the rest of the night in our bed. She stopped napping early and we gave up cc after trying a sort of gradual withdrawal for a week. Nothing works with her! She's amazing but I wish she's sleep more!

I just expect her to wake now so it is a treat if she doesn't. Sorry I've not helped!

Hey Minipie! Me again!

Sympathies - as I am sure you would expect my DS is v similar to your DD in this respect. He seems to be her twin.

He too wakes up if we laugh too loud at the telly at night, if he coughs, if we flush the loo upstairs...etc. there's no WAY we could have a bath once he is in bed for example, whichever friends seem to find hard to believe.

His current trend is pushing his bedtime back later and later - often doesn't settle until nearly 8pm. And is bringing the morning earlier and earlier. We have had 0455 for the last couple of mornings and I feel like a zombie.

I don't really have any advice but lots of sympathy. My DS has never been a great napper and just has one nap after lunch - 90 mins on a great day but more often than not it's 40-60 mins.

A couple of friends have told me this all gets a bit easier once they stop napping altogether. Then they're too knackered to wake up in the night....am crossing my fingers this is true!

Have you tried acupressure to help settle back to sleep? It would take my DD 2 hours to nod off, now it takes 2 minutes plus a few simple pressure points also help her to sleep deeper. It's a lovely alternative to CC or feeding to sleep.
Here's my blog post on it if you're interested..
Best wishes
mydaughterwontsleep.com/2013/12/27/the-sleep-inducing-power-of-acupressure/

ah more sufferers! thanks everyone for the sympathy, same to you all.

I must admit I'm a bit horrified at tales of this going on till after 3 years old. I've been telling myself it will all be ok once teething is over... or once she stops napping... or something.

I haven't tried acupressure no - the problem is not getting her back to sleep (I can usually cuddle her back to sleep quite quickly, except after 5ish) - it's the fact she wakes up in the first place!

BotBot hello, no surprises to see your DS is the same! (were they separated at birth?!). Actually DD sleeps quite deeply in the early part of the evening - up till 11/12ish or so - so I guess at least we don't have to tiptoe around in the evenings. after that it's princess and pea territory. Her bedtime is 8.15/8.30 (we pushed it back to fix very early mornings so hopefully it will do the same for you).

Don't suppose you're in London are you Minipie?? If you are and you ever fancy meeting up with a mum who has a very similar-sounding, non-sleeping, highly-strung baby then just PM me...! Would be good to swap war stories with someone who gets it! All my friends in RL seem to have those babies who sit in their buggies happily chewing their toes all day, gurgling, and then sleep 7-7 at night..!

I can sympathize but have little advice. DS was like this until 4 and still sometimes is. He needs everything perfect.

As they get a bit older and you can have conversations with them it gets easier as we were then able to teach DS to turn on his own nightlight and open his own water bottle. So she'll either get older and start sleeping more or you will be able to explain things to her better, either way it gets a bit easier. Still frustrating though - DS will be 5 soon, he sleeps through most nights now but needs all perfect to be able to get to sleep.

I am indeed BotBot - SW London - you? would def be up for a meet up/commiserate!

I'm SE :-( but work 4 days a week in town near Charing Cross...

I'll PM you!

DS didn't sleep through regularly till he was between 4 and 5. DD maybe sleeps through half the time now and she is 6. Not what you wanted to hear, but the wake ups are less trouble the older they get and they are both very clever!

I could totally have written your post! DS2 was born 8.5 weeks early and had tongue-tie, reflux and generally was quite an unhappy sleeper till I weaned him early at 5 months. He can sleep through, but will only do it if everything is perfect. He's 15 months old, and has now not slept through in 8 weeks and I'm going slowly insane. I work fulltime and have a 4 year old DS1 who wakes up if I let DS2 scream too long, so I generally end up doing whatever I can to get DS2 back to sleep. Often hell wake up, scream, have a drink, get his dummy back from where he's thrown it and then go back to sleep. Sometimes though, he'll scream until I pick him up or walk around with him or something. On a good night he'll wake once, a bad night every 1.5-2 hours

DS1 was (and is) a great sleeper. DS2 is very different though - much more active when he's awake and seems to struggle swiching off sometimes. He usually settles fine at bedtime though and naps OK ish (better at creche than at home though).

I'm so tired I'm losing my ability to think....

that's interesting amyboo - I sometimes wonder if those early weeks of tongue tie and prematurity laid a pattern or habit of bad sleeping that we are still dealing with.

On the other hand DH and I are both pretty light sleepers (and DH doesn't need much sleep) so maybe it's just genetic... but apparently we slept ok as babies.

I am envious that you have one good sleeper though! We are planning DC2 and praying we get a sleeper this time.

I can't even face taking the side off the cot yet, I think that will just open a can of worms!

Why would you need to do that is she trying to climb out?