Self settling/feeding to sleep

[Haribolover]

Am currently stressed out by DDs sleeping. She is 21 weeks and usually wakes once or twice a night which is fine by me. The issue is she is fed to sleep and am being told by HVs, etc this is wrong and I heed to break the habit. We tried one night of pupd which resulted in over an hour of screaming and eventually gave in a d fed. I know maybe we should have done longer but she was getting more and more distressed.

If she wakes up in the night not for a feed she will often go back to sleep on her own or with musical toy. However the issue is putting her down initially or after a night feed.

Do we need to break this habit now, will it break on its own, if we need to sleep resin what should we do.

Am soooo worked up about this now it's taking away any enjoyment of DD. Also, needs feeding or rocking to sleeo for naps if not in car or buggy but less concerned about these and want to sort nighttime first.

Hiya, In my opinion 21 weeks is a little for sleep training. You're probably already doing this - but babies love routine - so a good place to start would be good one that you stick to. And a decent bedtime, wind down period of about 30-40 mins e.g. bath, massage, feed, bed.

We used baby massage and acupressure to help our daughter get ready to sleep and recognise it's sleep time. It meant that she dropped off very easily, so we didn't have to do CIO.

Here's my blog post on the routine that worked for us mydaughterwontsleep.com/2014/01/08/the-power-of-a-mothers-touch/

Good luck, and best wishes.

You could try Pantley pull off method from no cry sleep solution for a gentler response. Our LO went mental at PUPD at five months too.

If she's sleeping in decent stretches I wouldn't worry too much about what HV says.

I still feed my 13mo old to sleep. It's what gives the most sleep for everyone at the minute.

Personally I'd ditch the HV not feeding to sleep.

I still fed DD2 to sleep some nights when she was at school. She'd been able to self settle for DH from 7 months and in the night since about that age too.

Having a baby/child fall asleep on you is lovely. DD2 is now 13, she may not feed, but she still dozes off having a hug in front of the TV occasionally.

Do you want dd to self settle at bedtime or was this unsolicited advice from your HV?

Unless you're intending to stop bf soon I wouldn't worry about this until she's a bit older.

Thanks everyone, feel little better about it all. I am in no rush to give up BF, it's really the HVs are telling me it's do bad, she will never self settle and if I don't stop I'll be feeding her to sleep or having to drive around all
night when she is a toddler.

Is it something that could just come with time. We were thinking of just keep trying it but not making it a big deal if it failed. Is this sensible-so much contradictory advice out there and getting totally stressed by not know what to do.

starcrossedkayla.tumblr.com/post/48462427854/i-went-on-amazon-and-bought-all-the-top-books-on

I'd say this about sums about sleep advice

Haha I love that Emma, I researched sleep for ages in prep for a new born and basically reached the same conclusion.

I have 3 DCs and with each of them the beauty of bfing has been that they could be fed to sleep!!! It's one of the whole points of bfing imo!!!

In fact I actively kept it up until they all stopped bfing - about 13 months old. By then I found they were perfectly happy with a story and a song and being put down in their cot.

Ignore your HV and everyone else spouting this nonsense and do what works for you and your baby.

HV is right in a way. Letting them self settle will get the best sleep.
But if you are happy to feed to sleep and wake up several times a night then its up to you.
I didnt sleep train till 11m so much older until then i was feeding to sleep.
I started with naps but i did use CC, she took her first naps not on me and was soon up to 12h solid a night.
Because she gets to sleep herself she can do so again in the night if she wakes.

Bring able to feed to sleep is brilliant! I did until my DS went on a nursing strike when he was young - it didn't hinder his ability to self settle in the night and when he stopped bf he was only waking once in the night.

I found Being able to soothe a baby with bf such a wonderful thing and I loved feeding him to sleep, it was blissful and if any HV had made that suggestion to me I would have just ignored them.

I didn't mean to say when he was young but when he was one.

I think feeding to sleep is a most natural thing!

If your little one is only waking once or twice in the night she can self settle!
My DS was fed to sleep I took the advice of friends and HV and started sleep training which is when it all turned to shit! We are back to rocking/feeding to sleep and he sleeps far much better now than he ever did when we used cc/ gradual retreat!

I agree with many of the posters above in that feeding to sleep is so easy and natural. Why try stop if it's works? Just as a bit of reassurance my DS is 6.5 months has ALWAYS fed to sleep and is now sleeping 11/12 unbroken hours at night. He just ever so gradually reduced the number of wake ups then stopped. So all this "do not feed to sleep otherwise they will never self settle/sleep through/rods for your own back" is a pile of shite IMO.