Baby shuffling/waking at night - tie the grobag to the cot bars?

[doingflips]

I'm interested to see if anyone has heard anything negative about the effect on a baby's development if their grobag is tied down at night.

Our baby (now nearly 6 months) has always moved a lot during the night and used to wake himself up, so we started clipping the end of the grobag to the cot bars to stop him shuffling up to the other end. We also recently started clipping one side of the bag to the bars (low down so he can't reach the clip too easily) as he kept shuffling to the same one side and waking himself up with his face pressed up hard against the bars (he was also developing a bruised eye from doing this).

We use mitten clips (short ribbon with clip on either end) like these: www.etsy.com/uk/listing/113935272/monster-mitten-clips-or-choose-any?utm_source=google&utm_medium=product_listing_promoted_en_gb&utm_campaign=children_low

We tried different methods before using clips, such as cushioning the end, tucking a sheet tightly over him etc. but only the clips seem to work. If we're using a particularly long grobag we can tuck the end under the mattress instead.

Does anyone think this is a bad idea? Do babies need to move freely around the cot at night? I just don't want to be doing him harm!

I have never ever heard of anyone doing anything like this, ever.

Just let him move, that's what babies do eventually. What were you planning on doing when he starts sitting and standing, which will be quite soon.

GobblersKnob - yes, I had thought of that which is another reason why I posted. Are grobags any good to use once they start sitting?

Do not restrict your baby's movement whilst sleeping. It is hazardous and potentially could be seen as abusive.

Your baby will start pulling to standing and crawling soon. You need to realise that this is the next stage and is to be encouraged, not restricted, managed or stopped in any way. Ask for help from your HV if you find your baby's normal developmental milestones are cramping your lifestyle choices.

I can understand the thought process that led to this - my 7mo crashes about the cot waking himself up too and as he's my second I suppose I know he'll sort himself out in time, but I did wonder just how early it's feasible to put him into a bigger bed!

Grobags are fine for ages (think they now sell them to fit up to age 6 although I was hoping to get DS1 out before he grows out of his up-to-3yo) - when the baby starts sitting/standing that's usually your cue to lower the cot mattress so they're not in danger of pulling themselves out.

Thank you Twoandhalfwolves, this is my first so I'm finding my way, the idea came from another forum post I saw and noone there seemed to bat an eyelid so I thought it would be fine, so wrong!

I like the idea of keeping him in the grobag for now so that's good - when he moves around he will be able to stay warm.

Blimey.

Ds (18m) is like this, rattles and bangs his way about his cot from one end to the other. He wears a grobag and we have Bumpsters on the cot bars to cushion the bumps (thoroughly recommend them). Never thought of tying him down though.

The Bumpsters look great, thank you! Maybe those and the Airwrap together would be a good combination

They are fine moving around in a grobag, they can get very attached to them though, ds was in his until he was nearly seven

Grobags are fine until they move to a bed, but for the love of god don't tie your child down. Does it not seem odd to you when you typed it down?

I can see why this has raised strong opinions, but I can also see how maybe it might be considered as a logical step on from swaddling - which is pretty mainstream. We did have a period where if DS2 was overtired he'd jerk and scratch his face so sometimes I'd gently hold his hands down for a few minutes until he went to sleep. I'd hope I wouldn't get told I was abusing him - I think I got the idea from the no cry nap solution but again maybe I took a strange leap of logic from something else.

Does he want to sleep on his front do you think?

DS2 crashed and bashed around his cot and woke up a lot until he could roll over. He was desperate to sleep on his tummy......

Maybe83, I offered advice in my post. Op suggested her sleep was suffering as a result of her child moving around the cot. To have a child and then expect life to continue as it had before child is naive at best, harmful at worst.
I suggested asking her HV for advice, I do not agree what I wrote was nasty. I am utterly shocked that anyone would tie their child down at night. My comments I am sure are nothing compared to what some posters are thinking.

OP - I agree with someone ego suggested bumpers, they work best & I got them for the exact same reason. You can get thin ones or thick ones & short or tall ones - all depending on his range & strength of movement.

I see that you are being given a hard time on this thread, but as first time parents I do understand that with every best intention, we still sometimes get it wrong. No harm done yet but it's best to find alternate routes to a safe night for your DS.

Grobags are definitely an excellent choice and combined with bumpers your DS will be ok. Good luck.

I cannot believe that tying your baby down has even crossed your mind let alone actually doing it!!

If you are worried about him hurting himself on the bars so much just use a travel cot maybe if its that bad - don't tie him down - jesus.

Airwrap is good.

Also I think that using a travel cot with mesh sides would be a great idea if you're really concerned about his head banging on the sides.

I think you have to relax a bit and trust that babies sort themselves out in the end. He ll learn that he can't go anywhere eventually and stop banging himself too hard. They do move around an awful lot at this age and that's cos they are practicing using their muscles and rejoicing in their newfound ability to control their bodies. It's not something to get worried about, or to try and stop.

I wonder if you are thinking that he should sleep like a grown up does and using adult sleep behaviour as the 'gold standard' you need to get your baby to be doing?

If so, that's the problem, because babies, toddlers and children all sleep in very different ways according to their stage of development, and that's to be encouraged, not stopped.

I get why you're getting some really horrified responses although i can also see it would be upsetting to have all these aimed at you. I think there's an emotional and rational concern going on - as restraining babies is a big no no and probably triggers thoughts of cruelty and horrific accidents. I think you should take on board that people find this instinctively wrong, although its not the abusive and hideous thing people are worrying about, as you obviously didn't mean it that way... But please do stop as any ties or restraining mechanisms in a babies bed really are a strangulation risk.

Give the woman a break, she's sleep deprived which obviously affects judgement. We all know how horrendous sleep deprivation can be....I've not had a full night sleep in over three years...yesterday I just couldn't stop crying.

Many many of us have been sleep deprived ( I have since 2006, and a son w sn also). This is why MN is such a great resource, to know what's ok and what's not.
I truly hope OP gets some useful tips from this thread.

Doublelife thank you that was such an eloquent post. I wish I could have typed something similar but felt like I was choking on the fear that this baby was bring tied into its cot.

Totally understand sleep deprevation hence suggestion to speak to HV, it's not rational to think like this to the stage of actually carrying it out routinely.

I remember wishing I could gaffer tape a dummy on.

thankyou Igloo :)

Obviously tying him down is a very bad idea, but what about maybe a thin muslin like a blanket over the grow bag below waist level tucked in at the sides (so no suffocation risk). So if he really wants to move he can do but might stop him agitating himself a bit if he's rolling from side to side while dreaming?

Btw mine went through a period of waking up because she'd got herself into a funny position. I'd just go in and put her the right way around. It only lasted a very short time until she could sort herself out

In the morning I usually find her on her stomach upside down etc but she doesn't wake me anymore.

Also, this lady is asking for advice, don't know why the mean comments one after the other. I think she's got the message.

At first I was a bit shocked. But hopefully now OP realises there are the thick cot bumpers etc, all will be fine.

Ds is 15 months old and wakes up facing completely the other end of his cot. He's in a cotbed and it's big, but he shuffles, grobag and all down to one end, at some point sits up and flips down the other way. He doesn't hurt himself anymore and the grobag keeps him warm wherever he goes. He had a break from grobag over the summer, and I think it was perfect timing as he spent a good while may/June learning to walk and parading around his cot. I think he would have struggled and fallen a lot in a bag, but you can get some with feet.

God knows how long before he will stay in a bed though.

I just want to add that I thought of this and I don't think it's an unreasonable thought to have - how is it different from being in tucked in sheets? I'm surprised at the responses here. Ok, we get it, baby needs to move, but jeez it's not obvious that they can't still do that if the sleeping bag is tethered at the bottom at a single point.