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CC failed - what next?

9 replies

OnionRing · 06/01/2014 13:44

We tried CC at 7.5 months and persevered for 2.5 weeks before giving as she was still crying for up to an hour each time I left her.
So I took her back in our bed which is where she really wants to be, but I don't want her in there any more as it's causing problems with DH. She's 9 months now, do we try CC again or try pick up put down or something gentler? She has never slept in her cot, only on me, in our bed or her pram. She's formula fed (was bf until 7 months) and has a bottle at 1am and one at 5.30am.

I'm at my wits end!

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
ilovepowerhoop · 06/01/2014 14:15

could you try a gradual withdrawal, pick up/put down type thing?

OnionRing · 06/01/2014 14:44

Am I better trying cc again or will she be wise to that, or worse psychologically damaged by me trying it again?

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OpheliasWeepingWillow · 06/01/2014 14:55

Hmmm. I only ever did CC for 30 seconds, 60 seconds and 180 seconds, all with a timer. Each time I would go in, reassure her, lie her down and say shhhhh and leave until the next 30 seconds. I think after about 3 days DD realized I would always come if she cried and settled down.

Maybe try mini CC?

Tinkertaylor1 · 06/01/2014 14:56

Try baby sleep whisper it's starting to work for us

Tinkertaylor1 · 06/01/2014 15:02

I wouldn't do the cc again as it's obviously not working for you as a family so it's not worth the upset.

It only takes three nights of bad habits to take hold as I recently found out by letting dd in bed (9m)

The book was a good read, helped me look for sleep cues ect. I've just put dd down for a nap , she played for a while, then shouted for my attention and has now gone off. Saturday she SCREAMED and sobbed her heart out when I tried to put her down so its working . The book makes you look at her whole day.

OnionRing · 06/01/2014 19:57

Thanks, that's interesting Ophelia, it was having to leave her crying for 15 minute stretches at 4am with dd1 in the next room trying to sleep that caused the most stress with cc. Ultimately it ended with me and her crying and me sneaking her into the spare bed with me as I couldn't take anymore.

Tinker I keep coming across the baby whisperer method but don't know how exactly it works. Tonight I fed her and lay her down next to me and she howled until I walked her about at which point she fell asleep on me and that's where she is now!

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TheGreatHunt · 06/01/2014 20:00

What's your DH's problem? (I mean that in a nice way!)

Have you ruled out why she could be waking?

elportodelgato · 06/01/2014 20:12

Hi onion, I would agree with Ophelia, I used CC with both my DC and both times it worked very quickly, BUT I at no stage left them to cry for 15 mins at a time, which sounds like pure torture for both you and her.

I can't remember if the method I used had a different name perhaps, but this is what we did:

Quite strict bedtime routine with bath, bottle, story, kiss and cuddle then lights out and 'goodnight DC' and leave the room
after 2 mins, lights off still, pick up, kiss and cuddle, then 'goodnight' and go outside
After another 2 mins, lay DC back down if needed, shhhhh, pat on the back 'goodnight' and outside again
After another 2 mins, return to lying down and pat but no verbal cues at all and no eye contact
After another 2 mins simply return gently to lying down and leave the room
Repeat final stage until successful. Grin

I found that both DC slept better within about a week. They also worked out pretty quickly that a) I was outside the door and would come back if they really needed me and wasn't going to ignore them but also b) that I wasn't going to cuddle them to sleep

It really did work for us and felt like the kindest thing for everyone. I was not coping AT ALL with sleep deprivation and they were knackered too and needed to learn how to self-settle. I know CC gets a bashing on mn sometimes, but IME it's not cruel or damaging, and can be a quick and easy way of getting to a contented self-settling child. Both my DC now sleep 12 hours straight and go straight to sleep at bedtime which I have to say is one of the main reasons DH and I are still (reasonably) sane Smile

Good luck!

OnionRing · 06/01/2014 20:58

It's interesting that the shorter duration of cc still
works. I need to rethink this. I think I prefer that to standing over her picking her up and putting her down.

DH thinks I am reluctant to part with her at night and he is also right. I love bedsharing with her as I believe little babies need their mums close by but she's getting bigger all the time. I did cc with dd1 at this stage and it worked in three nights but she was already in her own cot in her own room and she was a better feeder and didn't have a night feed.

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