Please help with our sleep problems, i need my bed back!

[Marne]

I have 2 dd's age 2.4 and 4 months, dd1 has never sleped well and rarely sleeps through. DD2 sleeps well (up until a few nights ago) and only wakes once most nights.
Since dd2 was born i have been sleeping down stairs with her and dh sleeps upstairs. DD1 gets woken easily so dd2 wakes her up if she's upstairs then dd1 gets stroppy when i have to atend to dd2. Also dd1 wakes in the night climbs in with dh (so no room for me).

All i want is
*to be able to sleep with dh
*For dd1 to stay in her own bed
for dd1 not to wake up to 3 times in the nightfor dd2 to sleep in her cot in our room.

Am i asking too much?

I need my bed back and i need to be with my dh as we don't get any other time together.

I need some advice please, but not CC as dd1 makes herself sick after 10 seconds and strugles for breath. I dont know what else to try.

How amenable is your dh?
Mine wanted the kids out of bed so he took charge of the night time wakings in the end. They soon got fed up with waking up only to be fobbed off by him, and stopped bothering.

Dh does'nt even notice when she climbs into bed, he's a heavy sleeper.

Would he be willing to help? If so you could give him a nudge.

With my 4th ds (now 18 months) I went back to work and my job starts at 6am which meant I had to get a good nights sleep. So dh took over the night shift and I slept on the spare pull out bed in the sitting room for the first couple of weeks. My ds soon stopped the night time wakings and I got back in bed with dh after two weeks. Bliss! 4 months on, DS is now in his own bed with his brothers upstairs.

I will have to give him a big kick , i have told him to put her back to bed but he is such a deap sleeper, a bomb would'nt wake him up .
I am now back at work and i need some sleep, sleeping on a small sofa has given me a bad back

Marne can you gradually five her less and less attention night by night. Let her cry just a few seconds more each night (I know it's hard) until gradually she'll work out that it's not worth the effort.

I know what it's like. I've not managed CC because my babies just scream like it's the worst thing that has ever happened to them in their lives. I know what you mean about struggling for breath. I can tell by that sentence that you have really gone through it and I feel for you. Especially since you're already back at work.

It won't last forever.

Sorry I can't be more help. Remember YOUR needs too in the night. Give your DH a good kicking and get him involved. It'll be worth it in the long run.